Am I being a prat re Aldi cashier ?

[MurphysColeslaw]

I sometimes nip into Aldi if I finish work if I I’m on a 9 finish and need wine or whatever.
Often there is a cashier who has been quite chatty (male) just normal ‘have you just finished work and next time it was what do you do ? I get it, the store is quiet at that time so maybe he’s bored and is just trying to make friendly conversation.
Last week I went to the self serve bit and he was able to verify my alcohol purchase from his till.
He then proceeded to tell me he was able to see what I’d bought and started listing it, which I have to say made me feel uncomfortable.
Last night I whizzed in and bought a pizza, and went to the self serve bit, he appeared out of nowhere and said ‘Oh having an easy pizza dinner are we’
He’s putting me off going in.

Just say ‘Nice work, Sherlock’ and roll your eyes.

It's not like he's following you out into the car park.

I wish that's all I had to worry about in life.....

I have actually got far more to worry about .

There’s a butcher’s shop near me which sells nice meat, and has a lovely deli. I stopped going in because the guy has too much banter. I just want the meat, not the patter. Some people love it though.

I don't like that kind of overfamiliar banter either OP, but having worked in a supermarket decades ago I know that some customers love it and some cashiers just do it to be friendly. Just say the minimum, like yes or no - and if he asks you for personal information just say you don't like to give that.

You're allowed to ignore him. You don't need to be 'nice" to him. You could literally look through him as if he wasn't there, and that would be ok.

If it feels off, it's usually off.

Some people do love it, but it's not usually women like OP looking for this from men in my experience.

I would have a stock of brief, uninformative responses ready to use on him, like:

This and that
All sorts
Pretty busy (all for 'what are you doing now? type questions)
Oh I won't bore you with all that
Oh, hello (to anything, just blanking the actual question)
Got to go, I'm afraid
Oh excuse me, my phone's buzzing

I don't know - there were women who were happy to have that sort of banter with the male cashiers. I would feel exactly like the OP - but working in the supermarket was an eye opener for me.

Crikey, he’s just being friendly.

Some people are just more open and chatty than others, it doesn’t make them “off”.

Wear head/ear phones and use the self service till.
I have the same issues when visiting Costa. I’m all peopled out by the time I go in or it’s my day off. It’s put me off going in because I can’t think of anything interesting that I’ve been doing that day!

Yes.
Lighten up Op it is his wat to make convo and get thru his day.

I’d feel uncomfortable too.

Once I bought condoms from a big supermarket, and the male cashier winked at me and made a comment. I laughed but it was a bit cringe. I now only go to my local village Boots and the ladies in there don’t bat an eyelid.

If it feels off to OP, it feels off. If she's not comfortable with a shop worker commenting on her purchases, and popping up out of nowhere when he sees her, she's not comfortable with it.

She doesn't owe him anything.

So he wants to talk to OP.

OP doesn't want this. I'm wondering why she has to go along with something she doesn't want, to help him through his work day?

Go to a different shop, or go to that shop at a different time.

This. His chat may be unwelcome to the OP, but it should not be hard to just give a short answer, and go about her business. There is no need to treat someone like they don't exist, in this case. Goodness.

Is he this chatty with everyone or just you?

On the surface, I'd say just ignore it. Wear headphones maybe, or just give very plain, short answers to everything.

Generally, I'm someone who likes random chats with people like this. I think it makes a day much nicer and it's something that's being lost. But I've been caught out before a couple of times when a man (once a colleague, once a neighbour) was being friendly/chatty, but something I couldn't articulate just felt "off" to me. I told myself I was being stupid. And then later on my instinct was proved right.

I don't like banter when it's over familiar

But this guy is like you, a shift worker and he's obviously got some time to go! When I was working long 12.5 hour shifts I noticed around 19.00 you get second wind as you know that long day is soon coming to an end, so you'd be on a bit of a 'high' - maybe he's the same so has a bit of a chat with the customers

Are using their app/clubcard? How does he know what you’ve brought?

Is he new at the job and hoping to impress his boss with “friendly customer service” 😂

It is a boring job and some people love the chat, he’s just being friendly.

I think he has edged over a line by listing your purchases, it sounds as though he is monitoring you. It's fine to chat about someone's purchases as they go through the till (excepting medical or sensitive items such as contraceptives) - like asking if a food item is nice or how you're planning to use an ingredient, but it shouldn't come across as an ongoing audit and critique of your shopping.

It's difficult as he might just be trying to be friendly and getting it a bit wrong. I would try to avoid him if you can, but if it escalates it might be time for a quiet word with a supervisor.

That would annoy me too.

We often go to the same pub for lunch and an incredibly friendly member of staff has started anticipating our orders. Now I should love this, but I hate it!

It's difficult to get the balance right when you work in customer service. There's an expectation from the employer that they'll engage I imagine, and it's hard to do that when you've got next to nothing to go on to start a brief conversation. So it might come across as stilted, or that they're taking an unusual interest in something particularly mundane.

I wouldn't find it odd if someone who worked in a shop I went in regularly tried to extend the conversation a bit, that's human nature. But you don't like it, so do what you need to to stop it.