Adult charged after slapping my autistic son, what happens now?

[Lisa121888Marie]

Hello, would be greatful for some advice please. My 11yr old son was slapped around the face by a 22yr old adult. I called the police and statements were taken both sides. She attended court for assault by beating and pleaded not guilty, and was put on bail until a trial date is set. My son is autistic and suffering with anxiety now. Is she likely to get away with this? I am struggling to understand how she can think its normal to slap a child. There were no witnesses, apart from the fact she admitted to both myself and my sons dad that she slapped him in the face. However she has pleaded not guilty.

Why on earth don't you actually read what OP wrote before commenting?

evil bitch, i’m not sorry to say if i was a family member of your son’s, i would have got to her before the police and gave her a taste of her own fucking medicine. my (much younger) brother had a fight at a similar age and i’m ashamed to say i shouted like a banshee at the boy he fought with and the crowd that recorded it, however i absolutely wouldn’t have raised a hand to any of them, even though i was totally incandescent.

I was assaulted by someone, even managed to film the latter part. The police refused to charge her as “no forensic evidence”. Hopefully she’ll get a conviction for the slap but I wouldn’t hold my breath sadly.

That's not what we are trying to say at all. The law works on the premise of innocent until proven guilty so there obviously needs to be proof beyond reasonable doubt.

It's not as black & white in that someone slapped someone & that's automatically an offence. There are defences where it could be argued that a slap was proportionate force eg if they had grounds to believe the person was about to commit an assault.

If someone was being threatening & abusive towards another child or they were arguing or fighting & an adult was intervening to stop someone being hurt then they could use proportionate force to prevent that - that could be a push, shove, restraint or slap (or even greater force if threat was high enough)

What people are saying is that the court will need to look at those things - what was the boy doing, what were the defendants sisters doing as well as the defendant herself.

No one can say for sure, not even OP as she wasn't there but there is a strong chance there is not enough evidence to find the defendant guilty. That doesn't mean the court thinks it's right to slap someone.

If someone was trying to strangle your child & they were turning blue & imminent risk & you bashed them over the head with whatever object happened to be near you but managed to kill them, you would have a strong defence as it was proportionate force to prevent a very serious crime & you would most likely be found not guilty of manslaughter/murder.That doesn't mean that bashing anyone over the head & killing them is okay.

Tbh this is all impossible for people to comment on. We are only getting your version of events. The court will hear both sides and that is the place, and the only place this woman should be judged.

Why was your vulnerable child on his own near their home ? If he’s so vulnerable are he should not be out alone ever .
Was he being unruly? I could see how someone would lose their temper if their sibling were being goaded. Doesn’t make it right!

"if it was a slap and nothing else and she claims it was in retaliation or to stop him from attacking her sister and this was her first offence, then I highly doubt she will get charged over this"

The woman assaulting OP's child has already been charged - it's in the first post

Perhaps she is also autistic . You shouldn’t let him out to play alone if he’s vulnerable .

Yeah, I'm staggered by the rush to defend this woman and minimise the assault (and then go on to hint at victim blaming). Just waiting now for someone to say it will be a waste of taxpayers money to proceed with the prosecution

@Lisa121888Marie - now you have @Whoachino 's extremely helpful message, you might want to ask MNHQ to delete this thread since it's moving now to victim playing and excusing the offender. Probably wouldn't be the case had your child been an 11 year old girl and the offender a 22 year old man.

Good luck to you and your son, and well done for reporting

I think that already happened

I totally agree that an adult who hits a child should be prosecuted but I’m a bit confused @Lisa121888Marie, by your comment that you live in flats but you later say your son is now nervous to visit his Granny and Grandpa in case he bumps into them?

MN posters really have it in autistic little boys.

A disabled child was hit in the face by an adult. There is no defence.

Not a waste of taxpayers money but a bit of a waste of time considering far more serious crimes go unprosecuted

I doubt anything will happen to her because she’ll deny it. No one should ever hit a child in case someone thinks I’m excusing the behaviour.

So you'd have no issue with OP (if she was present) going up to the little shits belting balls off her son, and cracking them round the face then? After all, they were goading him??

Why are we still making excuses for adults with anger issues, not to mention holding children to higher standards than adults? It doesn't matter if he was "goading" anyone! As a fully grown adult you should be able to walk away / use words deal with the situation.

This is like when people say to domestic violence victims, "What did you say to make him hit you?" Yuck.

And those making excuses for this person because "she may have autism too" are absolutely ridiculous. Quite a lot of autistic people don't go round assaulting people. If she's that violent because of her autism even more reason for this to be investigated as she's clearly a danger to others and potentially herself, and shouldn't be allowed out in public alone.

Yes you are.

A caution isn’t available if someone denies the offence so this is incorrect.

Also, she may be denying the slap or she may be admitting the slap but saying she was acting in defence of herself or another and used reasonable force. Both amount to a denial of the offence. She can call her sisters or anyone else present as witnesses.

Hmm, I’m not sure. There definitely could be a defence, but there are nowhere near enough details to judge. Eg Does the woman have disabilities? Was there a reason to consider any of his behaviour threatening? For all we know the woman could be 4 foot and the OP’s son 6 foot tall. He’s 11 - he might be little, he might not. If she has disabilities (for example) I’d be amazed if there wasn’t a defence. My son (aged 2) was seriously attacked by a 17yo autistic male. It never got anywhere with the police because of the offender’s disabilities.

Thanks for proving my point, I guess?

I think 22 is still a child

And you're not quite right

You're not quite right if you think 22 is a child.

22 is a child? I’ve heard it all now

22 is a grown adult not a child ffs.

What?

At 22 I had a mortgage and a good career.