Constipation- someone PLEASE help me

[HelpMeMelpHe]

I have been constipated for 7 days. That may not sound like a lot but I usually go 2/3 times a day without issue. I was away on holiday and ate crap food and basically survived on crisps and pizza as I was so hot I had no appetite.

I am currently lying on the bed in tears, I have tried:
orange juice
4 suppositories
3 x enemas
putting my feet up
relaxing
black coffee
a special vitamin tablet which DP says always makes him go
Drinking loads of water
pushing from inside my vagina
actually trying to manually remove the stool (sorry for the way TMI)
sitting in a warm bath
massaging my stomach
dulcolex

ill be ringing my GP first thing in the morning but can ANYONE suggest anything else. I’m in a total panic, I can just feel the rock hard stool, I’m in agony, shaking and it hurts to walk. To top it off I’m on my period which I hoped would get things going but nothing. Someone please help I am desperate and I’m worried my gp will just prescribe everything I’ve already tried. I’m a nurse and working all weekend and at this point I can’t see how I can go into work which would leave my team in the absolute shit (pardon the pun). I don’t know what to do 🫨🫨

Why IS this???? (Clearly I know nothing about the human body!)

Drinking hot water is recommended.
Awful feeling.

Macrogol (Laxido, Movicol etc) has an impaction protocol. You can Google it.

Also, if you're ever unable to get hold of it drinking a tablespoon of olive oil followed by a cup of tea or other hot drink can work but it doesn't soften the stool enough to prevent a tear.

I have motility issues due to dysautonomia and taking a sachet of Macrogol twice a day is the only thing that has ever kept me having a BM and not getting impacted.

Good luck with the GP today op.

Honestly, this sounds utterly awful. You poor thing.

Pico liquid, it’s made by Dulcolax. You can get it on Amazon.

If at any point you’re not able to pee, you need medical attention fast.

The Op hssent Been dor a week a green apple ain't gonna cut it
Op ignore all the advice about adding food stuff to your diet whennyour impacted you have gone past the stage of needing fibre
Speak to the pharmacist/ GP
You need to tackle it from both ends so movicol and suppositories
My son has chronic constipation, glycerin suppositories do nothing
But Bisocodyl suppositories work well for him .

Good luck OP. Hope your GP helps.
BTW, there was an interesting article in New Scientist magazine last week I think, about the seriousness of constipation.

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I name changed for this, because I've only ever told one person I do this! I rarely get constipated but I don't drink enough and sometimes get a very hard, dry turd which is hard to get out.
Based on my dad's childhood stories of constipation and how the hospital used to put a tube up his backside and push in loads of warm (he said soapy) water,
I have a big plastic syringe and I lie on my back on the bathroom floor and inject a few syringes full of warm soapy water to soften it. After a few minutes, it all gets drawn in by the dry poop, softens it up, greases it, and it comes out. 100% success rate, I swear.

A phosphate enema is probably easier and safer and does the same thing....

Exercise?

Shower hose on low, take off the shower attachment, up yer bum.

Bleach shower hose afterwards.

Or a phosphate enema?

My gay hairdresser does this to have a clearout before he has bum sex with his boyfriend. Having a hairdo is never boring.

Post bariatric surgery, it’s very common, I was in a lot of bother, crying on the loo. I wasn’t supposed to take dulcolax due to how it makes you cramp, but I did. The sheer relief when the ‘plug’ came out was insane.

I also bought Microlax (Amazon Prime) enemas but ended up not needing them. Don’t forget to drink loads to try to soften anything else going through. Hope it resolves asap, I know the frustration/pain/sheer horror when nothing works.

@HelpMeMelpHe and anyone reading this who is in the same position - get some Anusol and keep it in the fridge. When you do go its going to be painful.

I don't think I've ever been so invested in someone having a poo or not having a poo! Got my fingers crossed from afar and hope you are able to have a poo soon OP. 👏

I have nothing helpful to add apart from my sympathies, OP. I can still remember that feeling when it is stuck halfway up there, won't come out but won't go back in again (sorry about that)

Trust me the shower hose is quick and easy and does the job straight away. I was on oxycodone for a few months and that stuff is lethal.

Avogel Bambu coffee substitute , two cups of that and you'll be unblocked in no time. That's not what it's for, but guess who found out by accident so glad I was at home when I discovered this unexpected joy. 💩💩💩 I think you can get it from Holland and Barrett

I don't think you understand the seriousness of impaction it needs medical attention not adding new food and drinks stuff.

A phosphate enema is safer and also does the job

All the posts telling you to do the things you’ve already done several times must be almost as painful as the constipation

This thread is an excellent example of why you shouldn’t seek medical advice from people on the internet when you have no idea of the veracity of their claimed identity and actions. Really, some of the advice given is dangerous.

Really hope you get help today. That's a long time to suffer.