Work "get to know you"s

[MaybeIamJealous]

Work has decided the whole office (approx 400 employees) must take turns to introduce themselves to the rest of the office, i.e. stand up when it's your turn and say something about you, your role, your interests outside of work etc. This is being done team by team.

The first introductions were done today. Everyone seemed to claim to be champion sports people / have been an extra in a movie / went from picking up a guitar for the first time in September to playing gigs by Christmas etc. No average Joe's amongst them.

I've been told I cannot do a woe is me section (saying I'm disabled and in pain and have no tolerance for this kinda shit won't fly 🤣). So instead I'm thinking of saying something completely made up, but not so obviously made up as to have me outed as full of crap. I already suspect some of my colleagues today had also played this game!

I'm looking for some inspiration coz I'm not coming up with much. Would you love some of your ideas.

Hi everyone, I’m [xyz], and I work in the finance department. A fun fact about me is that I once accidentally entered a regional hot air balloon race while on holiday in SkegVegas, despite having no prior ballooning experience. I didn’t win, but I did make an unscheduled landing in someone’s backyard, where I was invited in for lemonade by a very understanding retired pilot.

I would not do this. No way. Not for me!

I worked with someone whose 2 truths and a lie were something like:

• I’m a massive introvert
• 2 truths and a lie fills me with horror
• there’s gin in my (tea)cup (at 11am in the morning)

Tell them you have 3 nipples, 6 toes and once spent the night in a skip.
That due to having to reveal this, you won't be attending any social gatherings that have alcohol as you would like to keep your job.

Thanks for all the suggestions - some more for laughs I think 🤔. Sorry I didn't come back sooner. Been taken down with D&V the last few days.

I've still not decided what I'll say, but think I'll play it safe (e.g. married to Tom, 2 great kids, 2 cats and 1 dog. When not working or taxiing DC around, I enjoy reading, TV, and puzzles of all sorts.). Inoffensive and true.