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February alcohol free/moderation thread - graduates and flunkies of Dry Jan 2023, new members welcome!

268 replies

MeinKraft · 01/02/2023 13:49

Dry January has come to an end (sooner for some of us than others Blush) but the alcohol free fun doesn't have to stop there!

Whether you're wanting to extend your drought, moderate your drinking on an ongoing basis or are thinking of going dry for Lent and want to prepare why not join us to discuss all things alcohol free!

OP posts:
Champagneforeveryone · 03/02/2023 20:54

DH and I ended up going to the city today instead but drove because of the train strikes so have remained dry. We're drinking AF beer tonight but DH is starting to agitate gently about DJ being over.

I have conceded that we will go to the pub tomorrow for the rugby. I will decide then whether I will have a drink or not, at the moment I remain ambivalent.

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 03/02/2023 22:58

So I'm in bed after dinner with friends who were all drinking wine. A few minutes f these nights out now have proved to me that I absolutely can do it and I don't sit there enviously looking at their glasses of wine BUT I find I don't get quite as into the night if I was having a few glasses with the rest of them. I prefer 1 on 1 or just 3 people - I can do that more easily without caring if I have a drink or not. Not sure why.

Anyway I left at 10.15 to pick DS up from cinema feeling glad that I didn't drink but also a bit non plussed about the evening. Maybe I will feel more pleased in the morning!

DoingALeicester · 04/02/2023 09:05

I want to keep my drinking at home, is that bad? I don't have a 'social' to give up really.

Had wine last night, but just x1 125ml, and x1 175ml (am measuring in a jug before pouring, for the app). Then I was happily onto hot water!

DH and I had steak and chips (major red wine meal for me) and then sat and played Boggle while I was nursing it, I would normally definitely have had a bottle.

I wasn't even that bothered. It was nice, but I wasn't desperate for it. Had an AF beer earlier in the eve as well rather than going straight on it, which I normally would.

So I'm pleased, but then I see you are all much better than me, so now I wonder what I'm doing really.

Interested in this thread?

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General food
WaxingGibbon · 04/02/2023 09:07

I had a small half glass of wine last night. It tasted lovely but felt like a weirdly wrong thing to be doing. It then took me ages to get to sleep because of heart racing anxiety, which I used to get regularly before DJ - but haven't really over the past 5 weeks.

I've woken up this morning and it's even worse - full on adrenaline, heart pounding, can't focus, random catastrophising thoughts about a work thing. So annoying. I haven't exercised properly either for a couple of weeks, so I'll try and get out today.

I honestly don't know whether to put it down to a particularly stressful time at work yesterday, or the alcohol, even though I only had a small amount. I had planned to have a proper sized glass of wine tonight but probably won't now.

WaxingGibbon · 04/02/2023 09:14

@DoingALeicester you are doing brilliantly! I'm the same as you, I go out so rarely these days moderation for me is about what I do at home.

HPLikecraft · 04/02/2023 09:16

Well I wasn't going to, but I caved and had a drink last night. Pink fizz. It was bloody lovely and felt nice, a whole half bottle. No sleep problems or other mental/physical ill-effects.

I'll try not to drink tonight though, and hereafter will only allow myself to drink on Friday or Saturday nights with the odd special occasion thrown in.

pointythings · 04/02/2023 09:18

I'm very boring. Had wine last night. Slept well. Feel fine today.

Selfesteem22 · 04/02/2023 09:26

@WaxingGibbon my anxiecty has been massively better in DJ - seems I can manage on drink without triggering my a but had 3 on 28th Jan- one of my slip ups and felt awful for the next couple of days

freshstart2023 · 04/02/2023 09:34

Oh I’m so happy to have found this thread.

I’m sorry to say that since completing 31 days sober for DJ I’m now struggling to moderate.

I had Monday and Tuesday off drinking this week (the end of DJ) but drank on Wednesday, Thursday and yesterday. I got quite drunk (had a bottle of wine each night) and have been feeling horrible and so anxious again.

My target was half a bottle of wine four nights a week and I’m currently on a bottle of wine four nights a week.

It’s an improvement on last year, when I was drinking a bottle every night, but I think I’m going to need some support with moderation going forward.

Arrrrrrragghhh · 04/02/2023 10:10

Gearing up for Lent. It’s longer than a month and I need the purposeful nature of it ie giving up something you love BECAUSE it’s hard. I like that it’s meant to feel difficult if that makes sense.
Its also a good time of year to get busy again with the evenings getting lighter. I can also enjoy Easter lunch with wine which also helps me think about restarting. Having a drink on a Wednesday just because it’s a new month seems a bit counterintuitive but I really look forward to “ the end”. One day hopefully it won’t bother me.

freshstart2023 · 04/02/2023 10:11

I won’t be drinking today (to get my three days off a week) but am planning to tomorrow, so will really need to focus on moderating then.

pointythings · 04/02/2023 10:34

@freshstart2023 sit down with yourself and work out what it is that is making you feel you have to have a whole bottle instead of a couple of glasses. Is it habit? Is the buzz not enough? Do you lose track? Once you know wat's driving it, you can do something about it.

cashmerecardigans · 04/02/2023 12:28

@freshstart2023 can you think of what worked for you in DJ? I think you set yourself weekly targets for the first couple of weeks. Would it help to try and put yourself back in that mindset if you can? You did so well to get through it and it was wonderful to see how positive you were feeling. Keep leaning on everyone here for support if you need it

Stickywhitelovepiss · 04/02/2023 12:29

@freshstart2023 I was genuinely wondering how you were getting on, and sorry to hear it's a struggle.

I'm still on Dry Feb, but I am increasingly getting the sense that abstinence is in some ways easier than moderation... And that's the nature of the beast - wine is a disinhibitor, so of course your willpower goes...

I'm wondering how I will handle it, and I think the only way for me is to keep it to 2 days a week, now I know I can handle days on days without.

cashmerecardigans · 04/02/2023 12:30

I'm still strangely ambivalent about it. Like others I feel a bit anxious about going back to drinking, so I had nothing last night. I'm trying to go with what I feel I want than fall back into the old mantra of it's Friday so I'll have a drink. No idea where it's going to end up though

FlyingPandas · 04/02/2023 12:47

@freshstart2023 so glad you have found us! Sorry to hear the last few days have been a struggle. I suspect I could be very similar if I went back to wine now. I hope you find a way forward that works for you.

@WaxingGibbon and @DoingALeicester honestly this thread is really not about avoiding drinking at home -it’s just that some of us have recognised that the at home drinking is more of a problem in terms of moderation than the going out drinking. For others like @pointythings moderation at home is no issue.

We are all going to end up having slightly journeys but hopefully we can still support each other in achieving moderation in some shape or form.

Blackbirdblue30 · 04/02/2023 12:53

I didn't do dry January- going for dry Feb instead. Currently on day 8 and aiming for 6 weeks. I find abstinence easier than moderation so it's been fine so far and I'm planning what to do with the saved money at the end of the stretch. However I have a wedding next weekend and wondering what to get myself at the bar? I don't want other people to notice and speculate.

HPLikecraft · 04/02/2023 14:02

I'm glad you're here, and sorry you're struggling @freshstart2023 . I hope you can summon up some of that DJ resolve you had before.

I'm currently in a services drinking a stupidly priced coffee while we wait for the RAC. Car broke down (luckily right beside services!) and I doubt it'll ever be back up and running again as it's an old banger. I hope this doesn't drive me to drink. Well, at least I guess I saved a bit of money in January... not quite a whole new (to us) car's worth though.😞

Selfesteem22 · 04/02/2023 14:50

@freshstart2023 sorry you are struggling there any non MN support you could access at all?

Badbudgeter · 04/02/2023 16:42

I think I may come join you. I started dry January late 6th. So I planned to keep it going till the sixth. I think I’m going to have a dry February too though I’ve dropped a couple of kilos and am generally feeling and looking better. I’ve not really been tested though as dry January was also skint January do it was a relief to knock wine off the shopping list. I think my issue with booze is my inability just to have a glass. I read somewhere that a unit or so of alchohol will give you a buzz but it diminishes and you are really just chasing that high.

I don’t think I drank that much really 1-2 bottles of wine a week but certainly over recommended limit.

Badbudgeter · 04/02/2023 16:49

Blackbirdblue30 · 04/02/2023 12:53

I didn't do dry January- going for dry Feb instead. Currently on day 8 and aiming for 6 weeks. I find abstinence easier than moderation so it's been fine so far and I'm planning what to do with the saved money at the end of the stretch. However I have a wedding next weekend and wondering what to get myself at the bar? I don't want other people to notice and speculate.

I like tonic water with ice and lemon; assumption is you’re drinking gin. Fevertree tonic water is really quite nice too. I work my way through the different flavours of they have them.

pointythings · 04/02/2023 16:50

I like some of the FeverTree flavoured tonics - the Aromatic one (with bitters) is my favourite. They're pricy though.

OneFrenchEgg · 04/02/2023 19:35

@lemonsaretheonlyfruit thank you for finding me!

lemonsaretheonlyfruit · 04/02/2023 19:40

@OneFrenchEgg Smile

OneFrenchEgg · 04/02/2023 20:02

I'm a bit similar to pp who are nervous/reluctant to try a drink! Thought I'd be keen but not really, bit worried I might fall back into bad habits.

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