What is on your ideal cheeseboard ?

[WildRosie]

Three 'firm' cheeses - Red Fox Red Leicester, Double Gloucester and Mature Cheddar. Two or three blues - Mature Blue Stilton and Shropshire Blue. Probably Yorkshire Blue as well. Butter if you want it. Water biscuits, sea salt crackers and digestive biscuits. Plus one or two dessert apples.

Drinks - Cabernet Sauvignon or Zinfandel, dry Chardonnay or vintage port.

I've just ordered a load of cheese now :)

All the cheese.

Pie d angloys as the soft cheese - like Camembert but with honey
Stilton
Emmental

Rough wholewheat crackers and some Carrs cheese biscuits
Grapes, olives, red onion chutney, picked onions

Cider or not too dry pink.Port.

Is PortSalut a type of cheese or a brand name ? I admit I'm clueless about some cheeses but I do know that Cracker Barrel was a brand of cheddar.

I have just discovered the most delicious thing - pickled cherries with a vintage Red Leicester on walnut crackers.

I like choosing really good cheeses from small producers; joy of the Internet is a chilled box of amazing and interesting cheeses on the doorstep.
Last box was a Little Rollright, a Sparkenhoe Red Leicester, an Ashcombe and a Kirkam’s Lancashire.

This probably makes me a heathen as a Yorkshireman but I can't stand Wensleydale cheese. Does sticking cranberries in it improve it ?

I've decided.

It's my birthday just after Easter and I'm having a cheese and wine party. You're all invited to join me (virtually of course) with your cheese boards of choice.

No doubt we'll still be in lockdown so we need something to look forward to!

I’m afraid I have a very downmarket cheeseboard:
Lancashire cheese
Wensleydale with cranberries
Pilgrims choice cheddar
Boursin
Jacobs cream crackers (I only like jacobs cream crackers!)
And grapes and cornichons (sp?)

To Drink: cold rose or if I’m feeling flush pommery rose champagne. Yum.

@WildRosie

This probably makes me a heathen as a Yorkshireman but I can't stand Wensleydale cheese. Does sticking cranberries in it improve it ?

I’m from Yorkshire too and can’t abide Wensleydale cheese with or without fruit.

All the cheese
All the crackers
Most of the pickles
Some of the chutneys
Smattering of fruit (grapes, dates, tomatoes)

Anything that smells of old socks

Unfortunately nowadays you can’t get the really smelly cheese

I agree @Bythemillpond

I remember cheese shops that were so stinky it’s like they were short of oxygen inside. Marvellous!

Carré d'Aurillac
Pélardons (but not too old)
Etorki or similar
A ripe Brie

Real French baguette
Bottle of Cahors or semi-sweet white Bordeaux (not the done thing but I love a sweet wine with cheese)

Just Wensleydale.. In any form. Maybe a smattering of Cheddar and brie for good measure 😂

Very mature cheddar
Brie
Applewood smoked cheddar

Caramelised onion chutney

Oatcakes
Baguette

Grapes

Montepulciano, rioja, and some strong black coffee.

Sensation chilli crackers
Tesco Garlic crackers
Wheat crackers

Mexicana
Bourson
Applewood smoked
Cheese and garlic swirl
Black bomber extra strong mature
Cream cheese

Tesco finest Chilli jam

Ooooh, my mouth is watering.

I would like:

Colliers Welsh cheddar,
Roquefort
Goats Cheese
Port Salut
Bavarian smoked cheese
Wensleydale with Cranberries.

Crackers- not fussy with these but I like those puffy ones (Cornish wafers?) and recently had some tasty pink crackers which may have been beetroot flavoured, IIRC.

Proper posh butter with salt crystals in.
A jar of cornichons.
Figs to go with the goats cheese.
Onion chutney.
Port.

🧀 🍷

Not to everyone's taste, I know, but a really crumbly pale Caerphilly.

I was at a hotel in the Lake District in the early 90s and their (excellent) cheeseboard had something called Oxford Red on it, it was manna, absolutely beaut, but I've never managed to find it again, so if anyone has a chunk in the back of their freezer....

You fucking bastards,absolute fucking bastards...

drools

My next shop is going to be really really really expensive now. I just want CHEEEEEEEEEESE

KeepWashingThoseHands
I remember years ago being in the cafe in a French supermarket. I was made to put my cheese on another table as my husband and friends were gagging from the smell.
The cheese was delicious.

Garstang Blue - just gorgeous & Carrs Water biscuits & then anything else of your choice.

I think Jacobs crackers are the work of the devil - but I do recall that thing many years ago which says it is impossible to eat 3 Jacobs cream crackers without water in a minute. DH - up for a challenge - tried it - failed

@BlackeyedSusan

You fucking bastards,absolute fucking bastards...

drools

My next shop is going to be really really really expensive now. I just want CHEEEEEEEEEESE

Has anyone bought any cheese today ? I've bought a bag of four cheese mix for my next pizza project. Other than that, I only have a small wedge of Blue Stilton in the fridge. Must get more Cheddar and Red Leicester soon.

I've dithered about buying a virtual cheese tasting...