Sneezed and farted

[MonoClue]

So, as the title says.
I don’t have to be anywhere today so got up and made my first coffee of the day. It’s got that first chill of autumn here so I decided to take my coffee back to bed and enjoy that lovely snuggly feeling of a duvet and MN lie in.
I got back into bed and got comfy; it was blissful!
Anyway I had a sneezing fit, one of those that you seem to be constantly sneezing. Annoying as hell.
But every time I sneezed I let out a short but violent fart, and because of the way I was lay in bed they rattled up if you know what I mean. (It was weirdly pleasant )
So of course being a grown up I got the giggles. Between sneezing, farting and giggling like a mad woman I had tears rolling down my face and all I could think was “I snapped and farted”.
My DD came in to check on me because I woke her due to the prolonged sneezing, stood watching me then shook her head and walked away rolling her eyes.
By this time I was a sneezing, snotty, farting, giggly mess who also desperately needed to pee.
Please tell me I’m not the only one. I keep thinking about it now and start giggling again whilst my DD just shakes her head sadly and murmurs about nursing homes.

Well what do you know? There are other ducks. I always thought that my late DM was the only quacker. Also, her being quite like HM the Q to look at added a certain something. Happy days.

Just remembered an incident related to farting that always makes me smile (and my DD very indignant!). Me,DD and her DH were visiting a cider farm. My DD was 6 months pregnant at the time,and had,for the previous few weeks been suffering from very bad wind. I'm talking trumps of epic proportions. DD and I went into a barn where there were several huge shire horses. I didn't see it,but one of the horses lifted it's tail in readiness to do a poo,and let rip with the most enormous fart I have ever heard in my life. I thought it was my DD! I turned round and said 'Bloody hell girl! You've surpassed yourself this time!' She simply couldn't believe that I'd thought it was her.

Back in bed again for an hour or so. I’ve been battling with what turns out to be a frozen shoulder for a couple of months now.
The doctor put me on Naproxen yesterday and the side effects include excess wind and diarrhoea . So this could get interesting

I can, on occasion, be said to sound like a duck when I fart. Other times, it's a long rolling bubble.....

DD, OTOH, doesn't fart. Or so she claims. I do agree I haven't heard her fart since she was a toddler, so it may be true.

Ds (4) was playing in an empty carseat box this morning. He was sat in it.

DH was playing with him, knocking on the box etc. He then (Dh) farted in the box. Ds popped his head up 10 seconds later gagging. It was absolutely disgusting and gross and hilariously funny.

I once put my back out trying not to sneeze, fart and wee. Was bending down to pick sonething up out of a shopping bag, felt a sneeze coming, knew I needed a wee and wanted to fart, so sort of clenched and crossed while bent over. Sneezed and something went twang and I couldn't move. Should have just let rip.

I love this thread OP. I've just read it to DP as an example of why I love MN so much!

I actually can't wait until I next need to pump, as a grown adult I'm going to nip together to make a high pitched noise !! Yey!

Oh dear..... I've just been swimming and after I was done I went in the shower and bent down and did a huge trump 🙈 there were only two of us in the changing rooms so I had to have the longest shower to make sure she was gone before I showed my face arrrgghhh 😂

Last might DS slept in my bed and totally starfished on me. So I farted on his foot

This is one of the funniest threads I've read in a while 😂😂😂😂😂

Just noticed that this is an old thread. Still, no better way to start the weekend than with a good old MN fart thread!

Yea I had it saved and forgot about it, still makes me laugh 😂