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AMA
Original poster

I’m a CF AMA!!

87 replies

CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 22:20

As the title suggests, I’m such a “CF” that I’ve dedicated a whole thread about myself.

Feel that now is the time to be open and honest, and accept questions from the general public.

So….Ask me anything!!!

Peace out!Halo

OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 22:58

@ACPC

Have you ever wore white to a wedding?
Oh constantly! Why should the bride get all the attention!
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Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:01

@Totallydefeated

You need to get your Ranger off my land.

and your bin out of my parking space.

Can you tell me, oh cheeky one, what leads you to believe you’re entitled to use my property to park your goods in?

First of all….I can’t see any numbers/ names across these parking spaces. And even if there was I can’t read so I wouldn’t take any notice (Technically, probably wouldn’t have a driving Licence but when In Rome!!)
I just need these spaces for 8-9 hours for the next two weeks whilst Tom and Jane over there are ripping out my bathroom… The bin is to stop other people stopping in our space!! Smile Aren’t I good to you!!
OP posts:
Totallydefeated · 07/09/2021 23:02

But I told you you couldn’t park there, and you did anyway!!

You can come and pick it up tomorrow at 6pm

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:04

@forinborin

Can you please collect your kids now? You forgot to after that playdate we had in Nov 2020. Hope I am not terribly rude Blush
To be honest that’s quite rude! I said it wouldn’t be long and is 10 months really that long between friends! I’ve sent you them food vouchers…Oh….no wait, I spent them on scratch cards. Oh….cough cough….Oh sorry, can’t stop. Covid symptoms. Got to isolate. Saving the NHS and all that! Wink Keep in touch, yeah?
OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:06

@Totallydefeated

But I told you you couldn’t park there, and you did anyway!!

You can come and pick it up tomorrow at 6pm

I have feng shui yoga at 6:01. I need to be in my “zen” state of mind for at least 12 hours after with NO distractions. You can manage can’t you…Just park just over there…over the bridge…up the hill!!
OP posts:
DisgruntledApothecarist · 07/09/2021 23:08

Lighthearted I guess Smile

Anordinarymum · 07/09/2021 23:08

Can I have my pyjamas back now

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:10

@DisgruntledApothecarist

Lighthearted I guess Smile
Even us CF’s are supposedly human and need the occasional smile that isn’t forced by wind.
OP posts:
LemonTT · 07/09/2021 23:11

Is Zilla your first name or surname?

Why is so much lettuce wet ?

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:11

@Anordinarymum

Can I have my pyjamas back now
Oh do you mean the lovely white ones…yeah the fancy ones that you got from that pop up shop in the shopping centre!? So….funny story! You know how you love my paintings!…..
OP posts:
Retrievemysanity · 07/09/2021 23:13

I can’t take your kids to school tomorrow, sorry. They don’t even go to the same school as my kids!

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:13

It’s my middle name.

For data protection (and because I also don’t want to) I won’t be giving my full name out.

My lettuce isn’t wet. It’s dry. Cold as ice….an iceberg you could say….

OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 07/09/2021 23:16

@Retrievemysanity

I can’t take your kids to school tomorrow, sorry. They don’t even go to the same school as my kids!
Oh please tell me you cannot be serious!

I was doing you a favour! Do you know how many school parents have been offering to take my children to school? But no, I stayed loyal to you because you stayed that extra hour after school with all the other kids in the car when I had got the after school clubs mixed up as Cosmo had Archery and you had to wait until he finished.

Seriously, wow! Well I hope you enjoy your one school run!

OP posts:
Mrstwiddle · 07/09/2021 23:55

Thanks OP, this has made me smile!

WhereIsMumHiding3 · 19/10/2021 19:58

(Oh I wish there was more of this! Such fun reading a CF parody thread 😆)

@CFofCFFFFFS ... please don't get cross but I can't take you to and from work tomorrow as I'm off sick. Really the extra hour round trip the other direction from my house is making me late to pick up my DC from nursery. You said it'd only be a couple weeks but that was in June and petrol is so expensive ...

Fi1982 · 19/10/2021 21:19

@CFofCFFFFFS best cheeky fucker ever

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 29/10/2021 21:33

What! Are you joking? Surely you could just open your windows and wear a mask? Better yet, I’ll just borrow your car and rinse your petrol/ diesel and not replace it because I’m doing you a favour when you think about it! Pfffft! They have late pick up at nursery right?

OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 29/10/2021 21:33

I don’t even try I’m not gonna lie…,it just comes naturally!

OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 29/10/2021 21:41

Bumping this up as I am the ultimate CF and I can do as I please! Feel free to continue to ama! Or aibu?

OP posts:
Userguaranteed · 29/10/2021 21:42

OP what do you get out of cheeky-fucking?

Why the cheeky-fuckery?

BruceAndNosh · 29/10/2021 21:47

Do you have a bladder problem?
Cos you always seem to nip to the loo when it's your turn to buy the drinks

Userguaranteed · 29/10/2021 21:51

CF, where are you?! I demand that you respond to posts at once!

NigellaSeed · 29/10/2021 21:53

Can you stop swapping our wheelie bins around after mines been valeted and waxed. CF!

Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 29/10/2021 21:57

A sense of self purpose and achievement. Can be exhausting though!

OP posts:
Original poster
CFofCFFFFFS · 29/10/2021 21:58

Funny you should say that….Desperately need the loo again! You’ve just reminded me….oh yes a couple of doubles yeah? Next rounds on me….promise!!

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