AIBU to think I'm not a terrible person for leaving my terminally ill partner?

If any of these posts are public I would comment that the reason you are leaving is because he had 7 affairs, don’t let him spin the “poor me” narrative without having told your side!

I'm not someone to advise airing your dirty laundry in public, but in this case you absolutely would be justified to post a factual "I wish the best for ex health. I ended our relationship after discovering that ex was a serial cheater."

This sounds perfect.

No no no - OP, tell your friends what he has done to you. It's in your power to hold on to your friendships, they only have half the story. He's treated you appallingly and they need to know - and you need some support x

Im sorry but I disagree with previous posters. I can’t imagine staying under the same roof as any man for a single night once I’d found out he’d cheated, let alone carry on living with him and accepting several other affairs. But you were clearly willing to accept a relationship like this for a very long time, so I think the latest affair is a bit of a red herring. - you should have left him after the first affair, rather than wait until the sixth. I couldn’t abandon a long term partner who was dying.

You can blur out/cover in aubergine emojis the screenshots.

Do cross out her name, it sounds like she didn't know you existed and then shared with you, or that's she's just a foolish teenager who is still learning.

I wouldn't give him until next year, sod that. Wouldn't even believe his diagnosis, could be part of the pattern of abuse.

Absolutely this!

Hold your head high and enjoy the rest of your life.

Of course it’s convenient. Until now she’s been able to brush it under the carpet but suddenly faced with the prospect of being the man’s 24 hour carer, likely including personal care, she’s like nah fuck that. I can’t say I blame her. Would you want to wipe an unfaithful husband’s shitty arse for years?

Are you sure the diagnosis is real? He sounds like a prime candidate for making it up. And even if it is real, feel no guilt get, away asap. He’s treated you really badly.

Or scorched earth....

I’ve stayed quiet while people lined up in my comments to call me heartless, but since the fiction on here is getting out of hand, let’s set the record straight once and for all.
I didn’t leave a sick man. I left a serial cheater who bled me dry.
For years, I was the sole breadwinner in our home. I paid the rent, the bills, the groceries, and carried us financially while he claimed he had no money It turns out his financial situation was most recently actually him paying the rent for the 19-year-old he was sleeping with behind my back affair number six or seven, I’ve honestly lost count. He was promising to marry her while living under my roof on my dime.
Two weeks after I caught him red handed, he received his diagnosis.
I sympathize with his illness, and I don't wish a terminal condition on anyone. But a medical diagnosis is not an absolution for years of deceit, and it doesn't transform a parasitic partner into a victim. Even after discovering he was funding another woman's life with my hard earned money, I still gave him until the New Year to move out so he wouldn't be on the street.
So to anyone calling me a monster for refusing to spend the next five years nursing and funding the man who destroyed my trust and took me for every penny I had, you are more than welcome to open your own spare room and wallet to him.
My bank account, my home, and my tolerance are officially closed.

I’d be leaving factual comments/partial screenshots on all his posts. Let your mutual friends know he’s a cheating, manipulative scrounger and that his last affair with a 19 year old was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

No way would I put up with him bad mouthing me.

I would suggest you don’t over-write.

”I ended our relationship as on (date) I found out you were cheating on me with a 19 year old, and using my money to pay her rent. I had planned to keep this private but every time you publish this false version of events, I will correct it”

Telling your story to your friends - by seeing them in person, not by posting on social media - is your power here and you need to be honest about why the relationship has ended.

“I couldn’t abandon a long term partner who was dying.”

If I didn’t love him, I could . I would feel so much resentment if I stayed with him.

Surely you can DM people if you don't want to participate in a public set-to? That's what I would do. Keeping it factual. "Actually we have split because of his repeated infidelity. He very recently fell in love with someone else and told her he wanted to marry her: that is why we split."

Make sure people know whst has happened. I would even be tempted to do it in the comment section of said post!

Absolutely this. If you think this is going to cost you your friendship circle then what have you got to lose?
Rip off the bandage and tell him to leave immediately. After the shit he just posted about you, surely you've had enough? Otherwise you'll find he is 'too ill' to go in January. Prioritise yourself now. Find your anger. Just think what a peaceful christmas you can have without him.

just post under his… I can understand that your 19 year old girlfriend would find it difficult to support you…

So sorry you’re going through this OP. Firstly his horrible treatment of you and then being made out to be a bad person. You are absolutely in the right to dump him, please do not give him any more of your time and money. Can you hide/block him on SM and block anyone sending you horrible comments and if you don’t feel up to revealing his antics publicly (although I do think that’s the way to go) as you have to live with him and don’t want to start more of a shit show, I’d at least threaten him with it if he keeps putting things on social media.

You need to stand up for yourself here. I understand it is so hard if you have low self confidence, but you have an opportunity to put your side out there.

I would respond on his post using one of the suggestions people have given you here. Ultimately you have nothing to lose.

After that I would look at finding a different place to enjoy your hobby and try and move on.

Have a one-liner to trot out if people say something eg. 'yes, his diagnosis was very bad timing. Unfortunately I'd just found out that he was taking my money not to pay off his debts, but to pay his 19 yo girlfriend's rent.'

That is so shocking on its own that I don't think anyone could possibly blame you. Don't protect him. Protect yourself.

Post that you're releasing him from any obligation to you so that he can keep his promise to marry his 19yo affair partner while he still has time. And that you're sure that she will be dedicated in caring for him, though she might have to start finding a way to pay her own rent if he is now unable to work.

Why would you choose to say nothing and lose all your friends rather than just tell the truth?

Fundamentally you need to get to a place where you accept that this isn't your fault and he is a shit person. Shit people get sick too.

He has a place to live. The place he has been paying rent for! So don't feel bad about kicking him out.

Stick to the facts, correct assumptions and hold your head up high. He'll be gone soon anyway and good riddance.

Sounds as if you need a new friendship group if all your friends know the man.

Take control, you do really need to be public if you want to keep doing the hobby. You'll outlive him and will need these friends for longer than he does.