It's the classic "DD15 threw an out of control party while I was on holiday" thread. AIBU to be this upset/angry?

@IllBiteYourLegsOff

I was hoping to hear you had got your DS’s medals back but this update is heartbreaking. I am so sorry. 💐

Oh my word. I am so sorry. How utterly awful for you

So sorry OP, my DS did similar when he was 16 had a party when l was on holiday, invited 8 people 30 turned up but he had the common sense of putting stuff away so when l got back from holiday 3 days later him and his friend were still cleaning up and it looked like the place had been burgled but it had not, mainly stains on the carpets and a couple of items broken and he never had a party since ! But like yours it could have been a lot worse
Wishing you all the best.

Fuck, that’s awful! How did you realise they came back the next day?

So sorry OP as others have said this is heartbreaking for you, can’t believe that the situation got worse, I was hoping for a medals reunited update from you not this

This is vile.

I presume you have let the police know and you will be able to claim on insurance. That is truly awful. I just hope your daughter is truly sorry. I may sound mean but I hope some of her things were taken and she feels the full impact of he actions. Sadly for what it is worth your daughter has been incredibly stupid. I am feeling very sad for you and your son. That was incredibly devastating news but let us hope it has sunk in with your daughter the reason for not inviting random people is purely so things like this do never happen again.

Yes - a local couple found their jewellery when they did a search of jewellers around here and first and then in Edinburgh.

Jesus Christ I’m so sorry OP.

This is the case that I referred to.

An honest jeweller informed the police that they'd received some of the jewellery from the theft, but the owners then found some more of the stolen goods in another shop.

[James Ness and Sons - for shame!]

https://www.professionaljeweller.com/edinburgh-shop-owner-caught-wearing-stolen-ring-by-victims-of-70k-jewellery-theft/

Im so so sorry OP. Even if you challenge the insurance company and they pay up, no amount of money can replace the sort of things that have been stolen. What has your daughter said about this? I think I would be sending her to live with her father permanently.

I'm hoping this has been reported to the police. As it is still theft.
A crime number then challenge the insurers go to ombudsman if needs be.

As it was done on a day they were not invited it does not hold.

Do exhaust the complaints process, get a deadlock letter and take it to the ombudsman. When the took the key was burglary/robbery 1; when they came back is burglary 2.

This is awful. I would make her pay for every bit of damage and theft. She needs to learn to respect her home.

Your DD didn’t invite them specifically did she? They waltzed in on the back of the rumour mill.

Oh OP, that's terrible news. I echo what PP are saying, challenge the insurers.

Have you reported to the police now?
This is theft even if they were invited in.
you can get a crime number and insurance should pay out.
although more significantly you may be able to get the jewellery back.

This is horrible. I am so sorry.

Your Dd and all her friends need to hand over all photos they took that night: there will be pictures of the ones who did this.

This doesn't sound like the work of 15 year olds and school leavers, more like adults and organised crime. The red herring is the hoover and its charger. They would have needed a car to move it. Plus very unlikely kids would have returned for fear of someone being in the house clearing up the debris and them getting caught. So sorry for you, am sure your insurers should be reviewing their position as house keys get lost and stolen regularly. With regard to your daughter maybe it's worth considering that what happened was never her intent, she only invited a few friends round, but randoms arrived and she was unable to control the situation.

When / how did you realise this, OP? Are the police aware?

So sorry to hear that OP. Hope you have some success with the police

I feel so sorry for you.

Imy mum left me home alone at 16 and I had a gathering that turned into an uncontrollable house party. It happened so quickly and I remember feeling so scared and stupid.
My brother's PlayStation and games got stollen and the house so unbelievably trashed.
The PlayStation was returned the next day without the games but the guilt I felt was enormous.
My neighbour helped me get people out in the end.
I have never scrubbed and cleaned so hard in my life. My mum's first comment was ehy does the house smell of bleach. Of course she eventually found out.
I did save up to replace my brother's games. It still bothers me now that I did that 20 years later.
I certainly wasn't leaving any mess and going out though!

I hope by now your daughter realises the impact of holding her party. She needs to show how sorry she is by going to the local pawn brokers either with you or her equally useless father. Personally I hope she has had a good cry because of this. She needs to realise how totally stupid she has ben. If adults have been able to beat the party I am glad they didn't rape her. I do hope her things were taken and broken as it will hit home to her why any future party needs to be when she is 18 and rents a room in a pub. She needs to be going to the nearest pawn brokers after school and on Saturdays she could go further afield to see if her brother's medals have turned up. Please tell her that you have had many messages telling you she is a very stupid teenager who deserves no treats or presents for a long time to come. I hope that after the police have visited she continues helping sort out the problems she has .caused. In future do not allow her to have her own key especially as she will be grounded for a very long time. She has been apalling.

So sorry to read this. How depressing that people can be so horrible. How do they live with themselves.

I mean yes she totally did a wrong thing but she presumably planned to hold a party to have some fun not expecting this.

We have a big teen birthday coming up and are renting a room in a pub despite having room for a party.