Where did I go wrong financially?

Because it’s much better than paying quadruple to rent one?!

Well, the only thing that you’ve done wrong is by expecting us to have any more knowledge of your friends financial position than you? We don’t know. We can’t advise you on that.

Youre in a great position. I’m 37 and most of my friends are only just on the property ladder and only just having children etc. even with decent jobs, teachers, musicians, computer tech type people. Etc. etc.

What is wrong is your expectations. Why set yourself the goal of being mortgage free, what’s the point?! It’s not the arbiter of success! You’re doing really well and are in a much better position than a lot of ‘successful’ people I know.

I do think you should be able to save more and you sound quite naive. You haven’t shared your outgoings etc or how much money you have left over and nor should you, but you can’t actually expect financial advice without those things?! You should be able to save more so start doing that and change your focus. What is the point in getting so caught up in all of this?! Enjoy your life!! Everyone’s situations are different and you’re single and we all know it’s harder to pay your way on your own. You really sound like you need to let it go.

Quadruple? Aye, if you say so! Buy a cheaper car but you'll have to cough up for all the extras. Rent and it'll be covered.

A car lease for a ford fiesta is c.£250pm on a 36 months contract with a £2300 down payment totalling £11,500. For 36 months.

You can get a 5 year old fiesta for £5-6k at the moment. Why would you lease?

stop comparing your life to other, stop looking back, you are where you are, look forward on how to make it better, you'll achieve more

because you don’t want to drive a 5 year old fiesta and would prefer to spend £300 a month on a nicer car. Is if that hard to believe. I don’t want a fiesta and I’m happy to spend £300 a month on a really nice all singing and dancing car which gives me huge pleasure every time I get into it and wouldn’t want to pay £30k up front for the pleasure of it

My husband and I felt this a few years ago too. Combined over £120k a year. We also couldn’t work out why so many friends on far less well paying jobs were so much better off financially than us. Gradually I found out that almost all of them had received inheritance or money from parents. Never underestimate how big a difference that can make to investing in property, having a low mortgage etc. which then in turn, makes them better off with every year that passes.

Which is an unaffordable luxury for most.

People can choose what kind of car and finance they want. I prefer an older car I buy out right - that works best for me. Not everyone has the same views and it's their money so they can spend it on what they like.

If you’re paying the mortgage on 60% of a 450k house, that’s where a lot of your money will be going. Add in the car finance…

Is 68k your take home or before tax?

if I were in your situation, I would make the minimum mortgage repayments, save the balance of what you were overpaying and put it towards your car finance. Ask for a buy out price, and pay it. I can’t understand why someone on 68k needed to use a credit card for a down payment on a car or for moving costs.

i’m 30, on 34k, a single mum and pregnant. I don’t own my own home, I rent and spend 900 per month on rent. I then allocate 500 per month for household expenses (utilities, food, etc), 200 for “fun”, and a further 100 for Christmas/birthday savings. I have savings equal to 6 months of living expenses for an emergency, 22k in savings for a mortgage whenever the housing market crashes, and I have already put around 5k into my daughters savings account. I own my car outright, I started by buying the cheapest car I could find, then a year later I sold it and put some savings with it to buy a slightly less crappy car, and did that every year until I had a new car.

i don’t know where you’re going wrong, but you need a bigger emergency fund than 4k.

People do buy cars for less than 4k which you actually do have in savings. In fact you'd have more savings without car payments

This is true. But then they can't plead poverty when they're paying out an extortionate amount every month on a luxury item.

I’m the same age as you. I’ve paid off my mortgage, but my flat was 90k last year.

I bought my first flat in 2018 on my own with 5 % deposit. My income was , and still is 20k per year and I’m a single mum to a disabled child. I renovated it by myself (new kitchen and bathroom etc) over 2 years while I live in it and when I sold , had 30 % deposit for the next place. Did the same again with a cottage - made enough to buy this current place without a mortgage.

I basically lived in building sites for 4 years and did all the work myself between working and raising a kid .

my place is small, nothing fancy, but I prioritised being mortgage free and have a modest house without over overstretching myself on a large mortgage .

my car cost 1k - it’s 14 years old, and I try and do most maintenance myself.
I don’t do takeaways , no holidays overseas, haven’t bought new clothes in years. I have zero savings and I’ve paid the minimum into my pension pot. I’m just happy that if I die, my child will have somewhere to live for life.

I think the way you spend your money makes a difference . Things that we think are essentials are not that at all. What I found in all of this is that 1. We can live without a lot of things we think are essential (I didn’t have flooring or running water for many months over the past 4 years). 2. Very often, when we don’t have the luxuries we don’t miss them- we may have even have a better time being creative trying to do something alternative 3. We are capable of doing so much more than we thing we can. I thought the extent of my DIY abilities were painting. Turns out I can learn to plumb, plaster and lay flooring quite well.

My point being- maybe your friends have cheaper houses, have skills they don’t have to outsource, and prioritise different things in their free time that means they spend less

Comparing oneself with others is never a route to happiness, but if you really want to do that, there are huge numbers of people you could compare yourself with who would lose a limb to be in your position.

Even in the category of small, nothing fancy, and willing to do DIY renovations, you have to appreciate that buying a flat for £90k is unrealistic in many areas! The cheapest 2 bed flats currently on the market in the whole of my city are on at offers over £115k and none are in places that I’d want to walk the streets after dark.

OP managed to bag a £68K accountancy job despite not knowing one thing about money. This is a truly inspirational tale. I’m planning to print it out and put it on my motivational memes board and I suggest you all do the same.

I don't think you're doing too badly, but as a PP said, rather than beating yourself up about where you are versus others, why not figure out what you want your financial goals to be, based on what YOU want (and what is reasonable) and focus on those. That'll bring you a sense of satisfaction and empowerment.

For example, have you run pension projections? The Hargreaves Landsdown pension calculator is great for this (just Google it, you don't have to be a HL customer to access it). You may realise you want to put more into your pension to have the retirement you want.

It's also good to have at least 3 months' salary's worth in emergency savings, which is more than you currently have. So you could set saving that sum as a goal.

Once you've done that, you could set yourself a new savings and investment goal. And so on.

I would add that being mortgage free in your 30s is by no means normal, although of course some people will be. Everyone's situation is so different, with family gifts, inheritances, joint incomes, different priorities... I'm 36 and only bought my first flat 2.5 years ago, so I only have 25% equity! If I can pay it off by the time I'm 60, I'll be ok. If earlier, even better (I do overpay a small sum each month but am prioritising saving and investing too). The average age of a first-time buyer outside of London is 32 (36 in London)! There's no way most people are paying off their mortgages within 8 years.

Basically, ask yourself what you want to be happy from here on in with money, and start taking action, and you'll feel better about it all, I'm sure.

Read the room. Your salary is over double the national average, you're solvent and not living hand to mouth like many at the moment. Stop humble bragging.

You have £180k equity in your home and 60% loan to value. So you’re in a £450k house and claiming you’re not “somewhere expensive”? I think you need to look at what other people are living in. I’m in a good size 3 bed semi that didn’t even cost half of that. I’m similar age to you and it’s certainly not the norm for any of my peers to a) be in houses of that value or b) have paid off their mortgage.

Is this a serious post?! If not, you are way out of touch with the general state of things in the UK. My partner and I, whilst we don’t have any debt, haven’t even managed to get on the property ladder yet. I am 34 and he is 40. We have a 2 year old, both have our own cars and have some savings (largely towards a deposit). I don’t know anyone either his or my age that has paid off their mortgage.

Hmm you make well above the average
your single and no dependants.
your monthly bills inc the car won’t be adding up to anywhere what your making. put your money in a savings and pay off lump sums off your house You need to be putting more away every month 4grand Is nothing if y out r earning that much. But don’t be disheartened your friends are lying and they probably all live off credit cards.

Nobody really admits their real financial status and everyone always makes out they are doing great. 68k salary is great, the fact you own your own home is great too let alone with equity! Savings could be a little higher for what you earn but obviously you could have a high mortgage etc and that's where it's going. Overall I think the people you are comparing to, you don't actually know what they really have. From the outside a lot of people look well off, when really they aren't!

I'm not sure why you think it's normal to have paid off a mortgage by 38, it isn't. If other people have done that it's likely they got help with a big deposit, are earning more than you, have wealthy partners, or are lying.
I'd be very grateful to be on 60+k at 38 with savings, many aren't nearly as well off. Comparing yourself to others (who do not sound typical at all) isnt a good way to find contentment in your life. In fact I'm not actually sure what the point is here - what is it you are unhappy about??