Where did I go wrong financially?

It’s absolutely impossible for anyone to comment when you’re not sharing your outgoings or situation. Do you have a five bed, 4 bath detached house with double garage compared to your mortgage free friend that lives in a two bed flat? Do you have children? Pets? Holidays? How much is your monthly car payments? Is your savings in a savings account earning some interest or a current account earning nothing? You clearly know the reason why you’re in such a poor financial situation. 38 isn’t too old to be sensible and make some adjustments but I wouldn’t say you’re badly off just because others have done better than you. It’s all down to priorities - some people want savings, some want regular Starbucks and holidays!

If I read on MN again that comparison is the thief of joy, I will spit. It is true, of course. All cliches have some truth. But the reality of life now is that just turning up for work isn't enough. To earn well, what you do at work has to generate new income. Those roles are better paid.

It’s probably all cobblers . People always want to make out they are better off than they are.

Same except I'm 37. Fucking hell. Is this thread a wind up?

You are 38, single and living in a £400k house up in somewhere that’s not expensive and you can’t work out where all your money goes?

I’m sorry but I really don’t see how your an Accountant if you are really asking where you went wrong and how others have got ahead on their mortgage.
There is such a wide range of reasons - salaries, relationship status, children, inheritance, property purchase prices - all of which as an accountant you’d know.

They may have had inheritances from grandparents, or other relatives, even parents. If most of your friends are buying houses, and close to clear of their mortgages at that young age, they are not at all typical. You just seem to have have unusually well-off friends.

How many years have you been earning above £40, it’s difficult to save much under that when you are single and have a mortgage
I think you are being a bit harsh on your self and should ease up on the obsessive saving etc, you are in a good position.
Eg I wouldn’t be buying all my clothes from supermarkets etc when you are earning 68K, you need to live and enjoy your life, You can’t take it with you and how do you even know if you will be alive in 5-10 years from now.
You are relatively young and have years to pay off your mortgage.

Comparison is the thief of joy.

One of the problems is that residential property has been among the most secure and remunerative passive assets for so long. It dips in value with the economy, but a freehold is easy to understand. Much, much easier than buying shares and watching the price rise and fall.

I think you’re doing well!

£68k is a good salary. Let's start there. I would have thought you would have more savings on those earnings.
I know being single is expensive (I've been single for about 4 years now - and was for about 10 years in my mid 20s as well), but you admit your mortgage isn't massive either. For comparison, I am 45, and earn £40k, and have about £20k in savings, and only a small amount of my mortgage left. I paid off 6 years worth of student loans about 7 or 8 years ago. I'm planning to buy a new car soon, and will use about £10k of my savings. I don't need, and can't afford, a brand new car - so I won't buy one. I think it's about knowing what you can afford, and accepting that.
Can you sit down and look closely at where your outgoings go, and if you can rejig any of them? Be honest with yourself about spending on takeaways, clothes, lunches, etc. For example, is it more important to you to pay off your mortgage, or build up your savings. I would probably be looking to have a cushion of at least 3 months salary, before I was overpaying my mortgage, for example.

I'll tell you why OP - because a lot of people sponge off the bank of mum and dad rather than earn it all themselves as you have. They stay at home to 'sae for a deposit' (rather than going without things and taking longer to get one), get big fat pay offs, all food and bills paid for years - of course they get a head start.

You're doing just fine.

How incredibly faux naif you're being. To be mortgage free by 40, unless one or both of them is a very high earner, they obviously, so very obviously, had help from mummy and daddy, put down a fat larger deposit, so had a shorter term or lower payments. You must know this surely or what kind of an accountant are you? Money doesn't just appear out of thin air. They've been given a leg up by the boomers. It's pretty much the defining issue for success nowadays - are your parents well off and if so are they inclined to help you out? It's a long hard slog for anyone for whom the answer is no, even on a good or joint salary.

You, however, are nonetheless incredibly well off. £68k a year in the Midlands? You're laughing. Compare down not up, and don't compare what you've managed to do on your own with what some people have had plopped into their lap by mater and pater.

None of my friends (bar one, who is bank rolled by parents) are even close to paying off their mortgage. Mid thirties and all decent earners. Not sure how all your friends have managed this. It's probably BS.

@Mariposista our 24yo son is currently living with us. He'd prefer independent life, but while we have space and love for him, we'd rather he saved the £1000 per month to finance the next stage of his life. Which will be expensive. I migrated to the USA in 1980 with £600 to my name and a marriage certificate; two months later, I had a professional job, and a few days after the job, I had an apartment too. I think that would be much more difficult nowadays, so I am sympathetic.

Thank you for saying this.
I think the OP is Insensitive and triggering to people with real financial problems.

You're doing a hell of a lot better than me!

The OP has to be a joke?

I don't anyone who has paid their mortgage off before the age of 40. Even my parents hadn't paid there's off til they were well into their 50s and in well paid professional roles (Dentist and Senior social worker.)

You sound well off to me, and you obviously mix in more affluent circles. Few people are mortgage free by age 40. Most of my circle weren't even in a position to buy before the age of 30, some still aren't in that position at age 40.

Be grateful for what you have which sounds like plenty.

Unless your friends all inherited a significant sum - or had a very large deposit to begin with - or they have always lived in a VERY affordable home which they have consistently overpaid into - I can not see how they are mortgage free at 38….

If there is a mystical secret however you manage to uncover - please share 😂

People who are mortgage free without help from parents are the type to shop around, save and who spend far less than their contemporaries.

To be honest op, you do not sound financially savvy.

To have debt on your income is ridiculous as is buying an expensive home in the Midlands.

I'm assuming your house is quite expensive as you say only £180k equity.

There are a few expensive parts of the Midlands but there are very very many nice/ decent/less expensive parts.

The car on finance sums it up really. Lack of forethought is why you still have debt, and low savings whilst being single and earning £68k.

If you have only earnt £68k for a short period of time then thats the reason and maybe you are more financially savvy than I'm giving you credit for.

close friends you trust or just chewing the fat with a acquaintances/ work colleagues?

Chewin the Fat 😂 that tickled me

If they lived with family for the first few years they would have had a larger deposit and so could have paid off mortgage faster.

If a couple then even if as a couple they earned as much as you, they would have a larger tax free element, but chances are combined they earn more so combined with couple savings (it doesn't cost 2 x to house, feed etc 2 people) and so have more money to pay off mortgage.

They could have had a financial gift, they could be student debt free if their parents or grandparents had set up savings accounts for them. They could have been gifted a car or bought a car while living at home so don't have those payments to make.

The possibilities are quite varied and large in number.

Also if you’re on your own and have 180k equity that’s the same as if a couple had 360k and in the Midlands that might not be the case due to house values. You have to work on the assumption that a couple might split up (and half of them will at some point). Yes, they might have repaid their mortgage now but if they live in a 250k house and they split, that would only be 125k each (less with costs of sale), which is a worse position than you are in.

£68k pa, £180k equity in your house, £4k in savings. And you are worried?

How long have you got left on your mortgage @ogfs ? When do you want to be mortgage free?

You earn twice the national average salary, so what are you doing with it? Supermarket clothes and Netflix don't cost the earth so where is your money going? Holidays? Wine? Meals out? Cinema? Or is it all going on your mortgage and bills with nothing left over? If the first option, enjoy your hard earned money! If the latter, are you overstretched and will you be in trouble when you renew your mortgage and the rate has changed? Can you get a lodger or downsize?

Fwiw, I am 42, earn far, far less than you and have 26 years left on my mortgage. I'm not worried about it.