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Original poster

New Job wobble-the toilets

94 replies

CurlyTop1980 · 16/03/2023 08:14

This is gonna sound so weird and this has made me want to leave.

I've been working in a private school for about 2 and a half months now. It's fine. Part time, 3 days a week. I'm a DSL. Myself and the DSL manager (there's a few campuses and she has over sight of them all) sit in the admin building. After half term I was on training for most of the last 2 weeks and I was only in the office once. I've been all over the campus. But last week the manager approached me and said that the cleaners are unhappy at the state of the toilets and if its me who has been dirting these to stop doing it. I was busy and didn't really take notice of her. But then over the weekend this really annoyed me. I was on campus yesterday and I asked her about this. And she was clear the cleaners came directly to her and accused me messing up the loos. I don't know what this means. I barely use the loos in there and a few weeks ago I noticed some loo roll on the floor and I took some clean loo roll and picked this up and flushed it away. Apart from that the toilets seem clean.

The building we sit in has a large conference room and lots of visitors going and coming. Why do they think its me? The HR Team sit there also and all new candidates come for interview/induction also.

I'm really put out by this. It's making me really uncomfortable and I'm thinking do I really want to remain working somewhere like this!?

Dh says I should just ignore it. But I'm really festering. What should I do??

OP posts:
Greenfairydust · 16/03/2023 12:12

@StressedToTheMaxxx

''Why are people bigots for pointing out that different cultures use the toilet different ways? They do. Some cultures don't sit on the toilet seat, they put their feet on the seat and crouch to use it. Some cultures use hoses and find those that only use toilet paper dirty (us). Why is everything "bigoted" these days?''

Your point is irrelevant as the OP has mentioned that she was born here.

It would indeed be bigoted and unacceptable if some people in her workplace assume she is the one making a mess simply because she is not white...

GoldenCupidon · 16/03/2023 12:32

This is really silly, sounds like someone has decided to use your "local" toilets to make a mess and it's coincided with you starting. I'd grab the manager and just say "look I was a bit taken aback when you spoke to me about the toilets, but just to make things perfectly clear - I'm not making a mess in there, in fact I've barely used them, I haven't even seen them in a mess. What's been happening?" Then she can explain the problem and you can suitably sympathise and agree to keep a look out. LORD knows why she thought it was you, most likely someone suggested it as you're new, or they've mistaken you for someone else.

If it's a school surely the most likely person to make a mess is one of the kids?!

SnowmansLand · 16/03/2023 12:43

namechange8621 · 16/03/2023 09:33

The dirt toilets accusation is often used against (usually) Asian people by those holding bigoted views.
Other than that, if it is a toilet that everybody else only uses foe number ones and you arrive and start using it for number twos then I suppose they would notice. I know that the counter argument would be "Everyone needs to go sometimes" but I rarely (if ever) even wee outside of my own house, even when I am out for fifteen hours.

Are you trying to normalise not going to the toilet?

Georgiarule · 16/03/2023 12:52

I had a very similar situation at my old work!

I’d just started, the toilets weren’t even the companies but the buildings due to the layout. The floor was having work done and the male builders kept using the female toilets. Due to this I never used this toilets but the office ones upstairs.

The MD PA claimed it was me, never directly to me but to others. Someone else I worked with ending up telling me as she getting sick of telling this women the builders were using the women’s toilets. The site manager for the building ended up sending her the CCTV from the floor to prove that people had stop using those toilets due to random men being in there doing during the day

Goodread1 · 16/03/2023 12:52

Hi Op
I think it's really Weird and extremely offensive for her to gave a go at your like this,

Sorry you have experienced this kind of attitude and behaviour,
I wonder if she treats other members of staff like this too?

Or
Did she be emotionally be abusive towards you cause you are an easy target,?

as you are a new member of staff, so she thinks she can get away with shitty behaviour,
Like she demonstrated with you recently Op@CurlyTop1980 ,

I would keep on eye 👁 on her, and put her straight Op@CurlyTop1980

Who the hell does she think she is talking to someone like you are dog 🐕 shit that she accidentally stepped on her shoe, ! !!!

Goodread1 · 16/03/2023 13:01

Hi Op

I think the way she spoke to you is start of bullying 😔

The correct way for her to deal with this issue,
Would have to put a notice in the staff toilets reminding people how important to maintain the staff toilets in same way that you like to find them .

It's totally unacceptable her attitude

Her attitude reeks to high heavens !!

limitedperiodonly · 16/03/2023 13:07

Like many South Asians I usually just poo once a day in the morning before my shower so almost never need to do it outside. It's something we are taught as children.)

@CluelessInThe21st it's not a racial characteristic. I am white British and it is also my usual habit to shit in the morning about 15 minutes after getting out of bed and not go again until 24 hours later. I was not taught to do this, it's just something that comes naturally. I haven't made a survey but I expect other people's bowel habits involve different times of day and/or frequency which are also natural to them.

IScreamAtMichaelangelos · 16/03/2023 13:17

Op, are you female and do you have periods? Is it possible that some blood residue was found in the toilet and that's why they think it was you? Obv the above would depend on there not being other females around at the times/places in question.

It is a terribly odd thing for them to have accused you of :/

SmileyClare · 16/03/2023 13:21

My manager was squirming as she said it then rushed off

This has been handled so awkwardly ! It’s pathetic that your manager couldn’t discuss this properly with you without dying of embarrassment.

Could be something innocuous like disposing of tampons incorrectly for their plumbing system or something?

WhimBarWhey · 16/03/2023 13:30

I'd probably go all Shrek and quote the big man himself, "If it was me donkey, you'd be dead."

SmileyClare · 16/03/2023 13:31

I admit I’m finding this odd.

I work as a cleaner in people’s homes and dirty toilets are part of the job. I wear protective gloves and get on with it. I certainly wouldn’t complain about evidence of poo or blood.

I would imagine cleaning school toilets with heavy footfall are going to be far more messy. Not sure why it being a private school is relevant Hmm

Unless there was excrement purposefully smeared on walls or something obscene, what on earth is this about?

Original poster
CurlyTop1980 · 16/03/2023 13:38

I genuinely wasn't expecting a huge response. For context I am white. Just not white English, I dunno if this makes any difference.

I'm defo gonna take a lot of your advice and speak to my manager next time she is in. She is actually off tomorrow so it will need to be next week. Me and her have a supervisor set so best to have it there and recorded I suppose

Thanks all of you.it is very much appreciated.

OP posts:
Original poster
CurlyTop1980 · 16/03/2023 13:40

SmileyClare · 16/03/2023 13:31

I admit I’m finding this odd.

I work as a cleaner in people’s homes and dirty toilets are part of the job. I wear protective gloves and get on with it. I certainly wouldn’t complain about evidence of poo or blood.

I would imagine cleaning school toilets with heavy footfall are going to be far more messy. Not sure why it being a private school is relevant Hmm

Unless there was excrement purposefully smeared on walls or something obscene, what on earth is this about?

The toilets are spotless. Apart from the loo roll I found on the floor, I haven't noticed any dirt. I tend to use the teachers loos in the High School of the campus as I'm there most of the time. They are a lot dirtier.

OP posts:
Wanttobefree2 · 16/03/2023 14:03

namechange8621 · 16/03/2023 09:33

The dirt toilets accusation is often used against (usually) Asian people by those holding bigoted views.
Other than that, if it is a toilet that everybody else only uses foe number ones and you arrive and start using it for number twos then I suppose they would notice. I know that the counter argument would be "Everyone needs to go sometimes" but I rarely (if ever) even wee outside of my own house, even when I am out for fifteen hours.

I know people who refuse to use toilets outside their house, but to be fair they are there to be used and if you need to go, you need to go :-)

Nowi · 16/03/2023 14:41

Just repeating what owlatnight said about it being better for our bodies to squat. I saw this on a tv programme recently, tried it and can confirm it really is good. Sorry but thought worth repeating. Agree with others, totally outrageous, lots of good suggestions definitely don’t let it go OP.

SmileyClare · 16/03/2023 15:09

If it’s a matter of some toilet roll on the floor then the cleaners are being ridiculously precious to
a) complain about it and
b) accuse one member of staff

I’d suggest speaking to your manager:

Could you explain the reason why the cleaning company made a complaint about me? I always leave the toilet as I find it and I resent being singled out and accused of vandalising the staff toilet.

SmileyClare · 16/03/2023 15:21

If you arrive and start using it for number twos then I suppose they would notice

What odd comments 😂 You’re saying doing a poo in a staff toilet is an issue?
It’s a toilet.

sweetcornfeta · 16/03/2023 15:39

Maybe you weren't singled out and the manager
Spoken to various others?

Original poster
CurlyTop1980 · 16/03/2023 15:43

sweetcornfeta · 16/03/2023 15:39

Maybe you weren't singled out and the manager
Spoken to various others?

I'm her only supervisee. She was clear it was directed at me.

I as I've said have no idea what the issue is as the toilets whenever I uave used them are clean.
I don't know if they have spoken to other people.

OP posts:
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