The Bluestocking - where women are women, and small furry animals are gerbils, quokkas, capybaras, or a red panda called Rosy

[MarieDeGournay]

Welcome all to the Bluestocking Pub, a haven safe from harsh reality [mostly] full of good company, and excellent food and drink served by the most efficient team of gerbils in the hospitality industry.

It's OK Magpie, I'll never switch allegiance from the trim monochrome elegance of your lot to the showiness of the Hoopoe, although I look forward to seeing one

That's all right @MarieDeGournay, I understand the lure of the new and exciting!

Very smelly, hoopoes, or so I have heard.

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2021/05/hoopoe-smearing-egg/618798/
Goodness me!

I googled that, and I wish I hadn't, esp as it's lunchtime😨
The uropygial gland of the incubating and brooding female is quickly modified to produce a foul-smelling liquid, and the glands of nestlings do so as well. These secretions are rubbed into the plumage. The secretion, which smells like rotting meat, is thought to help deter predators, as well as deter parasites and possibly act as an antibacterial agent.[27] The secretions stop soon before the young leave the nest.[22] From the age of six days, nestlings can also direct streams of faeces at intruders, and will hiss at them in a snake-like fashion.[14] The young also strike with their bill or with one wing.[22]
Wikipedia.

Well, Magpie, I think that's game set and match to your lot in the [short-lived] Magpies v Hoopoes competition!!

I've probably seen too many Gary Larson cartoons, because I'm imagining two female Hoopoes getting glammed up to go out clubbing and dabbing foul-smelling uropygial secretion behind their ears😆

I've probably seen too many Gary Larson cartoons, because I'm imagining two female Hoopoes getting glammed up to go out clubbing and dabbing foul-smelling uropygial secretion behind their ears😆

I can picture exactly the same thing, Marie! 🤣

When we lived overseas I used to watch hoopoes from my bedroom window. They are exceptionally pretty and their call sounds just like their name.

I never noticed a smell, but then we had cows going past the gate and crapping on the road, and woodsmoke blowing around, so probably my nose was numb.

I don’t believe it’s possible to have seen too many Gary Larson cartoons. I don’t blame him but I do rather regret he decided not to allow any of his work on the Internet. Though maybe he’s done the world a favour as unthinking AIs trained on his works of genius might not be the best idea.
Q: how can I transport a dachshund dog?
A: pop him in a cardboard tube and mail it.

Gary Larson doesn't allow any of his work on the Internet?
Oops! I've found and posted here images of some of his cartoons - they mostly look like photos of pages from books, so probably amateur admirers sharing them, I hope he doesn't mind that.

We had to stop feeding the birds because it encouraged rats (so my neighbour said).

We have cages around the feeders but the blackbirds, magpies and Jackdaws do a constant wing flapping motion to hang on.

The pigeons are quite happy pecking up the seeds that fall to the ground.

AI produced a lovely hoopoe image in the style mentioned but then I couldn't save it. I should have taken a picture of the image on my screen. Copyright stuff.

So I changed the prompt to say in the style of a black and white anthropomorphic cartoon and it produced the attached.

And then I found the original was saved! See next post for both images. Guess which one is the generic!

Hoopoes! Posted from my laptop as the iPad doesn't like posting images for some reason!

I thought that was an actual Gary Larson cartoon, Myrtle, until I recognised my own words! It's flawless.
I think we should turn this into a business, Larry Garson Cartoons Inc.😃

You guessed correctly!

I love it when you google something, and chance upon something completely unexpected, like this:
Benjamin Stillingfleet and the Bluestockings - geriwalton.com

Two thoughts: wouldn't Benjamin Stillingfleet and the Bluestockings be a great name for our resident pub-rock band? No? Oh ok then...😒
And if The Staunch Ally becomes inadequate to house all the lovely chaps who support women's rights, a second men-only venue could be opened, called The Benjamin Stillingfleet. 😄

Now I wonder would they say 'See you down the Ben' or 'See you down the Fleet'....🤔

The Benjamin Stillingfleet would be an excellent name for a pub! Probably "See you down the Benny" although I admit many of the men I know have quite niche senses of humour and would definitely think the drugs reference was funny.

I'm sitting in a shady but warm corner of the Bluestocking garden, wading through marking. Please send regular gerbils with calorie-free snacks to keep my energy up and make sure I've haven't lapsed into a stupor from boredom.

Marking

my mother used to bribe my father to do that for her

I'm about to go back to the couch grass infestation, so much nicer.

Doesn't seem to be much demand for The Benny yet, @MarieDeGournay

Sadly, no. Though maybe they are all out forming a protective cordon around the local LWS event keeping the TRAs at bay... yes, I'm sure that's where they all are🙃

I didn't ask Gemini for a specific number of patrons, it decided independently how many men were in there! You must be right Marie, they're all out with the Staunch Ally patrons being useful.

Further evidence, Errol, that penguins are in fact not just evil and vicious but cunning as well: unable to fly, they have recruited and trained seagulls as a sort of Fleet Air Arm to carry out bombing raids on cars...

but wait - I've just realised that the car is not just a badly drawn ordinary car, it's one o' they Tezzlerrrz made by that Elon Musk chap, so I rescind all the above, penguins are not just cuddly and lovely, they are intelligent and principled as well. They are Freedom Fighters, not the Fleet Air Arm!

The one who nipped Errol's DH's late father's hand was just having a bad day, and the other penguins had an Intervention later to explain that penguins don't do things like that, and it was damaging the corporate brand image.

The penguin put out a statement saying that it deeply regretted the incident, saying 'that is not who I am' and pointing out that it had taken fish from many humans in its long career without nipping their hands, and it is committed to working on 'being a better penguin'.

.

I have completed a quarter of the marking and am popping back inside to stretch my legs and reacquaint myself with normality (please note I mean Bluestocking normality, as opposed to that pesky reality thing). I think I'd like a plough(wo)man's lunch, with proper salted butter and cheddar so mature it brings tears to the eyes, please.

One assumes that one of the many subterranean levels discovered in a previous thread is a cheese cellar, and that we also have a cave specifically for aging cheese.

A gerbil will be there with Modom's lunch instantly if not sooner..

There is a bit of a problem with having a cellar for aging cheese - 'aging' is something that doesn't happen at the Bluestocking, just like calories and gluten and that kind of thing don't happen here.

However, we have a specialist cheesemonger, Louise, on speed-dial who supplies cheese of the appropriate age when requested - a bit like in cricket where they have a ready supply of used balls in case they need to replace the match ball.

So we phoned her and said 'Cheese, please, Louise' and she said 'How mature?' and we said 'Very mature' and she said 'I'll say some doubles-entendres to it and if it doesn't snigger, I'll send it over asap'.

Enjoy your lunch!😄

Excellent, thanks Marie! I'm looking forward to the cheese, although it seems extremely likely that it will be more mature than I am. 🤣