Should we ask strangers to witness our marriage?

[Weddin]

If you had strangers as witnesses did you enjoy it or wish you’d done it differently?

We are marrying secretly before heading off to Europe to surprise the people we’re going on holiday with with our very casual but meaningful celebration.

The legalities will be done here beforehand in a very basic legal ceremony at the local register office.

We obviously need 2 witnesses. Should we ask people on the street? People on here?! Have you done this? Do you regret any of it?

Lots to consider and we have a month to decide. The current plan is to keep it totally secret but just wondering if having strangers witness will feel…weird 🤷🏽‍♀️

I would not rely on finding people on the street. I used to walk past a pretty register office and got used to the sight of frantic couples trying to recruit passersby or they would forfeit their time slot. I did witness a couple of times when I had time, but most people passing were, like me, in the middle of their working day and couldn’t stop, and many register offices now, the one we got married in included, warn that they will not provide back room staff as witnesses in an emergency as everyone was losing too much work.

We brought two friends, both actors who were free during the day.

I responded to a post on here and was a witness around two years ago for a couple. It was a lovely thing to be able to do. There were a few people who offered

We met a couple on the beach in Antigua and got on well, a day or so later, they asked us to be their witnesses. It was a great honour and we had an amazing day, I think they did, too! We’re still in contact 35 years later!

I would love to witness a wedding of a random bride and groom. I think ask on here is a good idea, seen it done a few times over the years.

I've been a MN witness, the bride found me on her, the groom asked a friend who didn't turn up, so they had to find someone in the street - best/ worst of both worlds! I'd witness again if I was local/ available

They’ve confirmed that office staff or anyone else that works there can’t be witnesses as it could be considered a conflict of interest.

Im thinking of asking on here!

That’s so lovely

Why not ask the people you’re going on holidays with?

Whay are you turning a group holiday into your honeymoon? Not sure about any of this!

We dont want to ask friends really as that would add another level of “people who knew”. It’s going to be a secret…the ceremony abroad will be very casual, an elopement of sorts but with our children there and a couple of close family there. They won’t know we’re marrying until the day comes!

It’s not a group holiday. It’s just us and our kids and my sibling and niece. We often holiday together.

Yes this is really weird. We don't want to involve you, but surprise! The holiday is now all about us.

I don't get the cloak and dagger and all the drama. Just get married, no need for secrets, honestly no one cares that much.⁸

But you're not marrying as you're already married before the holiday?

Very very odd to create all of this when it involves your kids, too.

The people “surprised” won’t care about that element of it. My question is about how to plan witnesses.

You know that many people who marry abroad do the legalities here first? It’s easier and means that you know everything is legal

We got married in Queensland, just the two of us on Magnetic Island, on the beach. Our photographer was a witness. Also, I didn't have a bouquet, so people who lived by the beach approached us and gave us beautiful lilies from their garden, and they signed as witnesses as well.

The best day ever, December 2008.

Ask on here. If you’re near me, I’ll do it! :) Congrats on your wedding, OP.

That sounds beautiful. We’re not having a photographer or anything like that, the small ceremony abroad is simply to mark the marriage and it’ll be a nice moment for us all and the kids.

Your wedding sounds beautiful, love Queensland, I have family there x

Thank you so much 😊 I’m so tempted to ask on here.

You should! I’ve seen threads about it before on here, they’re great and I’ve always quite wanted to go to a random MN witness wedding as a result

We’re in NW England if that’s anywhere near you?

I’m in the north west and would happily be a witness but I think you might need to narrow down the area a bit more!

I was a witness for a couple who were doing exactly as you are doing...they asked on a FB group for the town where I live if anyone was free on a specific date. I responded yes, the bride phoned me to explain and I went and had a super time. I'd do it again in a heartbeat!

I am assuming your children are young, too young to be witnesses

Alas I’m in the SE. Have the BEST wedding though! Also, have a look at some of the other MN wedding witness threads - they’re lovely :)