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How to get cat back? Help!

63 replies

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 29/08/2026 23:20

Long post, sorry. We’ve been “fostering” my MIL’s cat - she’s sold her house and doesn’t get entry to the new place she’s bought until next month, then plans to get a load of work done before moving in. It’s likely to be the end of the year until she does. She’s in short term accommodation until she moves properly, and can’t have the cat there. Cat is ten, she’s had him since he was a tiny kitten, and from pretty much as soon as he was neutered he’s had free outdoor access with a catflap.

He’s settled very well with us (especially as we have a boisterous three year old cat) but has been absolutely desperate to get out from day one. So yesterday, after six weeks, was the day. We did everything right, waited until almost the cats’ dinner time, put some of his used litter round the garden, accompanied him outdoors - and he legged it straight over the back wall and won’t come back!

We know where he is, our garden backs onto other gardens, and he’s just mooching between them. He spent last night in someone’s barbecue pergola on a comfy sofa. There’s a neighbourhood watch on him and we can get a sighting, go to a garden he’s in, be right up close, and then he scrapers. MIL came round this morning and he wouldn’t come for her either. We have his litter tray in the garden, been calling non stop, and all that usual stuff, but I don’t think it’s that he’s lost (at one point he was just sat on the shed over the back laughing at me), he simply doesn’t want to come back - even though he must be starving now. Putting food out in the garden brought all the neighbourhood cats to the yard for snackies, but not him.

What next? It seems early to think about trying to borrow a trap, but I can’t actually think what else to do? We live on a very quiet one way street and he’s a streetwise lad, used to being in a much busier area than this, but I’m still worried that he’s at risk from cars if he does venture onto roads as he’s a black boy. Photo attached of him smirking at me from the shed.

How to get cat back? Help!
OP posts:
Hycosaneyedrops · 30/08/2026 01:19

Does he have a favourite toy or treat you could try to bribe him with?

GoldTie · 30/08/2026 08:25

I think I’d just leave him to come back as it’s just since yesterday and it’s his first taste of freedom. He knows where home is, he will get hungry enough at some point. I do understand your worry though.

Even if you trap him and bring him back he’ll probably do a repeat performance next time you let him out, so you may as well let him get on with knowing the area now.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 30/08/2026 08:38

@Hycosaneyedrops hes never been allowed treats although since living here he has been an enthusiastic recipient of “chicken yoghurt” along with Louie. I put a dish of that out and next door’s cat was thrilled.

@GoldTie i’m inclined to agree we just starve him out of it, but am also so worried. When we get him back he will not be going out again! We used the exact same technique to first let our boy out, and our girl before him, so this has been a bit of a surprise.

OP posts:
GoldTie · 30/08/2026 08:41

I think stop giving him the attention of calling him, following him to the other gardens etc. It might be spooking him a bit. Give it a few quiet hours and he might stroll back in.

Chemenger · 30/08/2026 08:57

He’ll come back when he’s ready. Given that you know he’s nearby I would not be worried. He’s enjoying his freedom.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 30/08/2026 09:01

GoldTie · 30/08/2026 08:41

I think stop giving him the attention of calling him, following him to the other gardens etc. It might be spooking him a bit. Give it a few quiet hours and he might stroll back in.

I went to bed about 1230 and up about 8 today - half expected him to be waiting, but no. The people he’s mainly hanging out with have (small) dogs so he’s drinking their water, but his last meal here was breakfast on Friday and he’s a wolfer rather than a grazer so he must be starving.

OP posts:
Pixiedust1234 · 30/08/2026 09:15

Ooof no advice as I think you are doing everything I would.

The only thing I might do, especially if I was around, would be to put some (smelly) food near the back door but be ready to shoo any intruders away. Is there any food he likes that Louie doesn't?

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 30/08/2026 10:23

@Pixiedust1234 Louie tends not to like fishy stuff, but he still had a good go at what I put out for him!

OP posts:
Gardenisablooming · 30/08/2026 10:27

That's your punishment for keeping him in.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 30/08/2026 11:16

Gardenisablooming · 30/08/2026 10:27

That's your punishment for keeping him in.

100%, also that MIL is here for the second morning in a row 😬

OP posts:
GoldTie · 31/08/2026 08:05

Is he back yet?

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 31/08/2026 12:45

No - and no sightings since Saturday now. I’ve made up some flyers to put through doors after work.

OP posts:
GoldTie · 31/08/2026 12:47

Oh, sorry to hear that! How worrying.

Northernlurker · 31/08/2026 12:55

If he’s disappeared I fear he’s heading back to her old house. Leaflet there. How far away is that?

Northernlurker · 31/08/2026 12:56

He is neutered isn’t he? No judgement, it’s just that neutered cats tend not to roam as far.

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 31/08/2026 14:54

Oh my goodness, yes of course he is neutered, and microchipped! I actually don't think he's heading back to his old house, he was spotted numerous times round about us on Saturday in different locations. I will ask MIL to message her old neighbours. It's about a 309 minute drive away.

OP posts:
Judystilldreamsofhorses · 31/08/2026 14:56

(That was supposed to be 30 minute drive, half an hour)

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 31/08/2026 15:33

Little Git ( and I say that with affection as one who is overloaded by two black cats) ,
He's getting his freedom back and he's getting food from somewhere.
Is it dry where you are or is he finding shelter?

It is god that your neighbours are all aware and on watch it won't help you catch him but at least they know he's not a random cat moved in.

Mine will come in for the rattling Dreamies ( male) whereas his sister will sit out laughing as long as she damn well pleases .
Good job we love them eh?

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 31/08/2026 15:33

Over lorded that should say

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 31/08/2026 15:42

@70isaLimitNotaTarget our boy would trample me to death at the sound of the snack box being opened, but this lad's never had treats, so that doesn't work. It hasn't been dry here - we deliberately let him out in drizzle on Friday afternoon thinking it would stop him going far, so that went brilliantly! I know he slept in someone's barbecue hut the other night, and I also know that he's been drinking from people's dog bowls.

I've printed out flyers to put round doors which I will do tonight, but do feel a bit stuck. MIL is apparently on her way to ours to do some shouting now, but that didn't work yesterday. (I do have a funny photo of her though, sitting out at our garden table with a dish of cat food she's got her book covering - and next door's cat practically sat on top of the book and dish.)

OP posts:
LateAgainJeeves · 31/08/2026 15:53

Maybe he's not fond of Louie. As long as he can get back in your house he will probably be fine. Stop fussing around him because he obviously doesn't like it or he is laughing at you. Ignore him, leave food out in the house for him/them. Cats do what cats want to do!

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 31/08/2026 16:03

@LateAgainJeeves I think those are valid points, but equally he's a senior cat in a strange environment, and belongs to a senior lady who is very worried about him. We had her blessing/encouragement to let him out, but I do feel responsible as it's our home he's gone missing from. God forbid he ends up under a car.

OP posts:
Favouritefruits · 01/09/2026 15:47

He’s happy, why do you need him back urgently ? You can see he is safe and unharmed, he’ll come back when he’s ready! It’s because he’s been cooped up for so long he doesn’t want you to lock him away again!

Judystilldreamsofhorses · 01/09/2026 17:26

@Favouritefruits we’ve had no concrete sightings of him since Saturday so it’s been a wee while now.

OP posts:
Shenhanigans · 01/09/2026 17:34

Where are you roughly? We've had a few cat scraps in my garden due to a new visitor.