My cat is horrible, please place your bets

[blankcanvas3]

Christmas tree has just gone up. My cat is notoriously a dickhead. Please place your bets on how long it takes him to deface it. Answer in days, hours or minutes. Or even seconds if you have zero optimism, like me.

For extra points, please choose how he will deface the tree. Options include (but are not limited to) a) scaling the entire thing and pulling it down. b) pissing all over it in dirty protest. c) attacking the baubles at every opportunity. d) showing his displeasure by increasing his torment on us tenfold so we have to take it down ourselves.

Also accepting tips on how to stop my cat being a dickhead this festive season.

Picture of dickhead included

He's an adorable dickhead ❤️

@blankcanvas3 five minutes and all of the above answers for terrorism of the Christmas 🎄 by a very adorable dickhead 🤣🎄❤️

One picture but so much to love 😻 I think your gorgeous dickhead is going to go all out and scale the tree, swatting a few glass baubles along the way.

It was a 2am scale of the tree to pull it down, and once it was down he promptly went to the toilet on it 😂 it’s a good job I love him

@blankcanvas3 on the plus side it lasted till 2am....🤣🤣🤣 they are little buggers sometimes but we still love em x

um… why did you put up a tree if you knew what would happen? Do you clean it and raise it again and eventually he gets bored?😂

I love this thread. Even when our cats are a__holes we love them.

Sweet boy - never mind stick the tree up again for round 2

My parents had two cats, who were fascinated by the Xmas tree - it was made clear to them they weren't allowed to play with/climb it. I went into the front room (it was down a corridor, so you could always hear if someone was coming) to see two cats sitting on the sofa, looking like butter wouldn't melt, one washing a paw – and the tree swaying merrily from side to side

‘It was made clear to them they weren’t allowed to play with it ‘
🤣🤣

The upside down photo defo illustrates your point 😄😄

I was gonna guess climbing the tree and pulling it down

I'm lucky, my dcat is really well behaved! 😄 we've had no scaling the tree or anything

I hope im not jinxing myself

Merry Christmas

For years, we had to put the tree on a table because the cats were sure I had brought it in as some sort of delightful indoor loo for them….Now it goes on a table so that the DGC don’t do themselves a mischief.

I saw a great Christmas card with two cats in santa hats in front of a Christmas tree singing "wreck the tree and blame the doggo. Falalalalaaa lalala lalaaaa!"
Dd has a kitten. Getting tree Saturday. Shes going to update a la Elf on the shelf.(all felt and unbreakable decs)

@civetcati think cats understand more than we think, but I’m not sure how you could make it clear it’s not to be played with 🤣🤣

Many years ago, my cat at the time carefully stole all the chocolate christmas tree things (I was broke and when I got a tree on Christmas eve these were very cheap), opened them carefully, licked them and put them in his special hidey hole.
Current cats haven't done anything to the tree in years past, but boy arsehole is on a bit of a '12 days of Christmas' kick and has been bringing me presents every night. Last night it was a giant rat. The night before he was peckish, so I got the legs, beak and feathers of some small bird.

Does he leave these gifts under the tree?

@ErrolTheDragon the tree isn’t up yet, but in the kitchen which does have fairy lights, fake candles and stuff on the island. Same place last 3 nights

we’ve only had him 6 months so I had no idea how he would react, I was just fairly sure he would do something like this! I’ve re-erected the tree and spent the day trying to tell him off whenever he goes near it in the hope it half trains him. If it’s on the floor again tomorrow I will rethink my plan

delightful indoor loo 😂😂 that’s made me cackle!

He's thorough, I'll give him that... 😂😼

Our biggest cat is terrified of Scenticles so we've stored the tree with those over the summer and it'll reek and make his eyes water for the first few days so he'll avoid it. I've also got a set of hanging bells that will go at cat head height, again he's scared of them. By the 30th he'll be happily sleeping under it no doubt.

Gorgeous kitty!

I used to have a beautiful 8ft Christmas tree that touched the ceiling full of baubles and thousands of lights. Thanks to my 3 cats I've surrendered and got a 3ft tree this year 🙄 This is Alan examining it.

I only have a small Jellycat Christmas tree, but was thinking of getting a little ready decorated one. However I’m really not sure that the more inquisitive gummy bear can be trusted with dangling baubles. 🤣

'Alan'! 🤣😍