Cat communicator. I'm in the wrong job!

[Toddlerteaplease]

My massage therapist was telling me that, she paid £70 for someone to come and communicate with her cat. She wanted the cats blessing on her new business, working from home. Apparently the cat told her she'd had a previous fractured jaw. She wanted to know more about her history. How on earth you prove this is beyond me.

My cats tell me exactly what they want without having to pay someone!

Well there’s woo bullshit and then there’s proper woo bullshit.

She's into woo stuff. But I didn't think she was that gullible. 🤣

Apparently life with her human hasn't been what she expected.

I've heard of this before

I'm not into this sort of stuff though

And I just think the owner is going to know their cat best anyway

Dd and I watched the end of a programme on channel 5 about a “Pet psychic” or something.
There was a camel that told its owner to branch out into making camel milk skincare, and a cat that thanked their owner for everything they had done for them (that’s when we knew it couldn’t possibly be true -a grateful cat!)

We enjoyed it very much - dd was unwell and feeling sorry for herself, but ended up almost crying with laughter.

So it’s a ‘clairvoyant’ but they pretend they can speak to the cat rather than the dead.

I’ll sign up to do that please.

"Your cat is feeling hungry... very hungry..."

I can't think of a better job than being payed £70 to play with a cat for half an hour and then make up some random bullshit for the bonkers owner.
Where do I sign up? 😁

My cat would channel fake messages and laugh an evil laugh.

...and you are sitting in their chair.
😂

Dear God. PAID not PAYED in my post above. 😭

Cheddar apparently telepathically told my sister that I hadn't given her any treats. And she's starving. Not true!

I'm inclined to believe your sister that that was the message. Whether Cheddar was embellishing the truth in giving it is another question.

I watched a show where a woman found her cat in a drain lost using a cat communicator (USA) and a black leopard agreed to stop hating everyone if they changed his name from Diablo to something nice.

So they did and he levelled up his behaviour.

I suppose you could X-ray the cats jaw if you had the money but it’s a vanity project for sure.

Pretty sure my girl would say she is treat deprived and the late Asbo would ask why fun (beating up the ndn cat) is illegal?

Cheddar was definitely telling fibs!

Ahh @FormerlyPathologicallyHappy what was the nice name the Panther chose?

I watched a show where a woman found her cat in a drain lost using a cat communicator (USA) and a black leopard agreed to stop hating everyone if they changed his name from Diablo to something nice.

What's wrong with Diablo?

Found on YouTube. The poor panther was renamed Spirit. No wonder he became placid - he was probably depressed. 🤣

TOTAL loss of cool points there.

I couldn’t remember if it was as shadow or something. Poor lad felt he was unfairly named.

Is your massage therapist's name Phoebe?

We could ask the cat 😼

This has made me laugh. The cat had expectations she hasn’t met.

Never have a work appraisal with your cat.
Fails to meet expectations

I was going to mention that, Grumpy, but I decided not to be so bitchy.