Help with grieving cat

[JaceLancs]

Sadly older of our 2 cats died last week peacefully asleep at home
younger cat who is nearly 6 is devastated - they did not seem that close and older cat barely tolerated him at best
He has not eaten much, howls and cries and sits on the spot we found her dead looking very unhappy
he is staying out of house more - when in ge sleeps more but will not go to humans much although he was previously a clingy lap cat
any suggestions?
we are still putting food down and sticking to regular routines, offering treats which are rejected
when he sleeps elsewhere or on ‘the’ spot we will go and stroke and fuss him
any of the felliways worth trying? Could a vet give him any meds temporarily?
it’s so upsetting to witness

I'm so sorry. Sending you gentle hugs 💕

You’ve been on my mind since yesterday. I’m so sad for you xx
hope you are okay xx

So desperately sorry to hear this. Please have an unmumsnetty hug.

Thank you everyone x I’ve been lucky today to be surrounded by love n support from friends and family
I was in Costa with DD this morning and 2 colleagues turned up with flowers and cards
In other updates vet rang and I have to collect him on Tuesday and take him for post mortem myself (3 hour round trip) it will take 2-3 weeks to get results if there is anything that is conclusive
insurance will cover approx 1/2 of cost - not that I care about that side but it may help others
I’ve also warned other neighbours who have cats - they all said they loved seeing him around as he was so affectionate which started me off again!
there has been so much weeping I’m worn out - just going off to meet DD for a swim as I need to take my mind elsewhere for a little while

@JaceLancs you don't live anywhere near Baggeridge / Himley do you? I've just seen a news article about recent poisonings there.

No I’m up in Lancashire
Had a horrible day yesterday as had huge bust up with DP
DC 30 and 31 think he’s struggling to cope with me grieving - I don’t care but can’t cope with this right now - I stayed the night with a friend

@JaceLancs oh dear - sorry that's shit x

I’m so sorry for you. How heartbreaking to lose them both. Sending big hugs xxx

Sounds like you have been a great cat owner for many many years and it will take some adjustment time for you. To lose one is hard, but to lose a 2nd much younger cat is devastating, be kind to yourself and allow yourself time to grieve. Hopefully the PM will provide you with some answers x

OP I'm so sorry to hear this. We lost our gorgeous little Balinese to a RTA yesterday and our companion cat doesn't seem to be coping very well. Keeps wandering around howling. That's why I clicked on your thread. I can't imagine how awful it must be to lose both in a week. We're devastated from the loss of 1. I really hope you find out what happened.

Thank you again everyone and big hugs to all who have lost their beloved cats or other pets especially recently @Rainyrunway
I collected Reub from vet today with DS and although I’d thought I wouldn’t want to - they helped me say goodbye with a final stroke and fuss with my eyes closed
It was a 3 hour round trip to PM place which is at a Veterinary branch of a leading university and will take 2-3 weeks to hear anything back
My local vets have been fab and did me 2 memory bags with paw prints, collars, jar with fur samples and condolences cards
I’m not ashamed to say I’ve engaged in huge amounts of retail therapy and will be going out for a special meal tonight and maybe a few cocktails

@JaceLancs do keep us all in the loop when you get the results. So sorry for your loss