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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

Is it random how cats choose their human?

35 replies

Cheekychip · 31/08/2015 13:54

I have never had a cat but I'm getting two kittens this week.

I keep reading comments about how a cat 'chooses' a person in their family as their favourite. Is this random or is there a way to sway the cat towards a particular person?

OP posts:

SmokingGun · 31/08/2015 13:56

Nope, my cat LOVES my DF, but my DF hates cats and pretty much ignores him when my parents come over.

SmokingCat trots around the house after him when they are here, and brings his mouse toy to him so they can play fetch.

It's quite sweet really and I think somewhere deep down DF loves him too

mmmuffins · 31/08/2015 14:03

Yes of course you can sway. Spend time with them. Be the one who feeds them, plays with them, strokes them, and has treats in your pocket :)

Fluffycloudland77 · 31/08/2015 14:43

Our cat responded more to my voice in the car on the way home than he did to dh.

He's never really seen the point in dh really.

PolterGoose · 31/08/2015 14:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

Cheekychip · 31/08/2015 15:41

Sounds as though it depends on the cat in question and their personality.

I love those cats that love everyone

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BagelwithButter · 31/08/2015 16:36

He's never really seen the point in dh really. Fluffy!

Fluffycloudland77 · 31/08/2015 19:14

It's true though, he knows who feeds him and gives him chewsticks and plays with him.

At least he doesn't curl up in my arms like a baby now and give dh the "i've got the mommys undivided attention, you're nothing to her now" look.

It will be fine op, cats know who mommy is. There's only the odd one on here who dashes to the door when the dh gets home.

Emochild · 31/08/2015 19:17

One of our cats chose me -I am the keeper of the food
One cat chose dd1 -I've no idea why, she dresses him up like a baby and has never fed him

Poor dd2 feels very left out -I'm tempted to get a 3rd cat in the hope it choses her -someone talk me out of it

Original poster

Cheekychip · 31/08/2015 23:37

It's really interesting how they can randomly select someone and it will be interesting to see what our two do.

I have noticed that cats do like my DH so it could be him but I would like it to be our children really (twins that are 3 in December). Although I don't want to be totally snubbed I'm not bothered about being their favourite as both the twins want my time and attention more than DH so I don't have much to spare and I love the idea of the kids growing up with a special cat friendship :)

OP posts:

Original poster

Cheekychip · 31/08/2015 23:38

Your cat made me chuckle fluffy,can just picture it! :)

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googoodolly · 01/09/2015 16:55

When we picked our two up, the boy just came and plonked himself on my lap and didn't move the whole time. We took them home in their carry case in the car, and he spent the whole journey putting his paw out for me.

He's two and a half now. He tolerates DP if I'm at work, but as soon as I get home he'll jump down to wherever I am for a cuddle. He sits on me whenever he gets the chance and comes to say goodnight when I get into bed! I have no idea why he picked me, but he has. The vet said he was obviously pretty bonded to me because when we picked him up from surgery earlier this year, he saw me and literally ran at me from the vets arms and was all over me!

NarcyCow · 01/09/2015 16:59

Ours prefer DH because he's the food dispenser and also has more patience for lap-providing duty. I like occasional cuddles but I'm allergic so shove them off me more than he does.

Neither of them particularly approves of children.

goodasitgets · 01/09/2015 17:02

I don't own a cat. And I never liked them. Not my cats but apparently I am catnip...

Is it random how cats choose their human?

smoothieooo · 01/09/2015 17:06

SmooCat prefers DS1 who (due to an oversensitive sense of smell where he gags at the opening of the food pouch) has never fed him. I will do for a brief cuddle though, if DS1 is not available.

The only place that the cat wants to be is on DS1's bed and he is desperate in his attempts to get in. DS2's room is next door and the door is usually ajar but the cat wouldn't even think to go in there!

Original poster

Cheekychip · 01/09/2015 18:01

These stories are so funny.
We pick our kittens up tomorrow so I will feedback any first impressions although I plan to let them settle in before introducing them to the kids but it may prove difficult to keep them separate.

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FireflyGirl · 03/09/2015 17:10

I don't think there's any way to sway them

R-cat decided I would be his slave 2 minutes after we walked into the cage at the shelter. Technically, it was DH who wanted a cat. He gets cuddles but we did a test and stood at opposite ends of the room and called him. No indecision, DH might as well have been pushing him at me.

T-cat avoids me like the plague. Will occasionally go to DH for a fuss, but loves DMIL. He's seen her maybe half a dozen times, and she's had more love from him than we've had in nearly 2 years!

GingerPCatt · 03/09/2015 17:16

It's totally down to the cat. When I was young (like 4-5) my grandmother had a cat that would scratch and hiss at everyone but would let me pick her up and play with her. She would even do tricks for me. No feeding involved.
Just proves cats are weird.

Original poster

Cheekychip · 03/09/2015 21:24

Definitely concluding that cats are weird! Maybe it's to do with how you smell?

When I went to view our two kittens the boy cat was very adventurous and confident, the girl much less so. Three weeks later when I collected them they had switched personalities! I hope he gets braver as we have two toddlers!

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Notsoaccidentproneanymore · 03/09/2015 21:31

I have 3 cats. They all prefer dh to me (even though they're my cats)!

It's very rare any of the cats sit with me. Though if I sit in bed, 2 of them will lay with me.

Cat 3 though doesn't seem to like anyone very much.

steppemum · 03/09/2015 21:35

I have always foudn that they randomly selected the person who fed them most often and gave them the most cuddles....

which is always me

Fluffycloudland77 · 03/09/2015 21:38

Dh's childhood cat didn't like any of them much but LOVED the neighbour over the road.

threenotfour · 03/09/2015 21:53

Our kitten chose my DS1 straight away. He does play with her and fuss her. I have conversations with my son sometimes and it's a while before I even notice the cat is laying over his shoulders. He doesn't even hold her she just lays there happy as anything for ages.
If DD trys to hold her she jumps down and runs off. DD is not impressed. Cat pays no attention at all to DS2 and vice versa. Funny things these cats & kittens.

Writtenbyme · 03/09/2015 22:04

When we went to the rescue charity to choose a kitten an older cat came and stretched up to me wanting to be picked up. So I did and carried her as we walked around looking at the kittens. She was so happy in my arms so of course we had to take her as well as the kitten we chose. The rescue people told me she had been overlooked for months as she hid away from visitors until we arrived. She was always my cat, she hung out with me. No doubt that she chose me, not just when we met her but always. Sadly she is no longer with us.

The kitten we chose at the same time, now a few years old, thinks she is mum to DS. She washes his hair like he is a kitten and lays with him to settle him at night.

KittiesInsane · 03/09/2015 22:14

I've just come back from a day (one day!) away, and suddenly the normally standoffish kitten is all over me like a rash, headbutting my legs, shoving her fuzzy little head into mine and meeping frantically to be picked up.

It's starting to remind me of the dog in Up -- 'I'm lying on your desk because I love you!'

FireflyGirl · 04/09/2015 11:54

You don't actually want to get to the keys on this cat warming device. What do you mean, your boss is waiting for the report you were writing which now contains 25 lines of 'gggghiudsxv kgffbj!!gfdesdhjgbfsdhj'?

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