Tom is not passive. He is often the instigator.
Possibly, but he doesn't lead from the front; he isn't open and overt about it. The "bullets to fire" comment is spot on. I'm afraid this is why I sometimes feel he is sly. The half-smile doesn't help either.
I also agree with the hypotheses as to why Paul doesn't like Noky. Noky is the epitome of poise, reserve, good manners and 'calculating'. I think she keeps trying to appease and befriend Paul because it's her main tool for dealing with people. I don't imagine a bolshy madam like Trisha would get far in the beauty industry (and hoorah for her!).