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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Oh Great, now dss has got himself a Thai gf who wants to come and live here[hmm]

37 replies

Carmenere · 02/08/2007 22:52

My dss 18 has just come out of a disastrous relationship, was cheated on and heartbroken but got over it. He is working in a restaurant in the channel islands for the summer and apparently has hooked up with a Thai girl of 28 who has just splt up with her HUSBAND, an islander. She told him that her husband could have her deported[a lie apparently] to Thailand and that she wants to come to England

Why can't he just have a series of casual relationships with holidaymakers?????

OP posts:
TheDuchessOfNorksBride · 03/08/2007 00:50

Because he's a teenager and needs to make life difficult - otherwise all those Morrissey and Radiohead songs (or the modern equivalent) have no relevance to him.

When is he coming back, September? They may have split up by then [fingers crossed and optimistic-looking emoticon]

Haven't you got a nice UNMARRIED girl-next-door?

KITTENSOCKS · 03/08/2007 13:18

Make sure she doesn't move in with you!!!!! Make sure dss knows it too, if she wants to come to England she can make her own arrangements. Are you afraid that dss is an easy touch because of his emotional vulnerabilty just now? Hope they split up, if so.

Original poster
Carmenere · 03/08/2007 17:10

She will NOT be moving in here. He is just such a bloody drama queen, he LOVES a bit of drama and of course feeling like he is the only one in the world who could save her. Apparently she is from a good family in Thailand, not destitute or anything. His dad is going over for a day next week to speak some sense to him.

I just pleaded with him on the phone that he has to start to make correct adult decisions, that it is not fair that we are worrying about him all the time, that if he does behave like a dimwit that we can't just keep on bailing him out and that if he get's into trouble he will have to sort it out himself.

Her husband is some highly graded martial artist

OP posts:
VeniVidiVickiQV · 03/08/2007 17:13

Well, if he is some high graded martial artist, he wont believe in violence.

Original poster
Carmenere · 03/08/2007 17:15

Here's hoping that he has got ethics but it is the channel islands, where the law is different and dss is a blow-in for the summer so he might just feel like squashing the cheeky little shit who is squiring his wife around

OP posts:
StarryStarryNight · 03/08/2007 17:16

Tell him "Fine, you can bring her here, but make sure you have a flat and a job first and that you can support the living for the two of you"

Would that work?

Original poster
Carmenere · 03/08/2007 17:25

Yes Starry I suspect the prospect of council tax will be enough to make him see sense

OP posts:
browniedropout · 03/08/2007 21:20

Give her a chance, before any decisions.

themoon66 · 03/08/2007 21:25

Does the GF have children?

lou33 · 03/08/2007 21:26

carmenere you should tell him about the mess my exh has made of his life , having just become a daddy for the 5th time to a thai girl only 6 yrs older than dd1

themoon66 · 03/08/2007 21:31

lou33... blimey.

lou33 · 03/08/2007 21:33

oh i thought it was common knowledge on here, lol, sorry

it's a really long story

sauce · 03/08/2007 21:33

Take A Look At My Girlfriend!

Original poster
Carmenere · 03/08/2007 22:20

Nah I don't need to give her a chance. She is 28 and left her husband two weeks ago and has shagged a naive 18 yr old and is now making noises about wanting to come to the UK after lying to him about being deported. She can feck right off.

OP posts:
themoon66 · 03/08/2007 22:23

Agree... don't give her a 'chance'. Think of your son and his long term future.

God almighty... i remember the agony i went through with DD, aged 17, shacking up with 30 year old twat face work shy git face .... grrrrr.

sauce · 03/08/2007 22:35

Yes, agree. Thai women are generally beautiful & your ds is wonderful to want to help a "lady in distress" but he should be careful. It sounds highly suspect.

lou33 · 04/08/2007 03:19

i agree carmenere fwiw

KITTENSOCKS · 04/08/2007 08:48

Just hope he doesn't 'lend' her any money!

Original poster
Carmenere · 04/08/2007 10:25

I don't think that she is some kind of waif either. she is supposed to be exceptionally beautiful and not destitute at all. And if she doesn't want to return to Thailand fair enough. BUT dss is just a silly kid and I think it is a bit cynical targetting a relatively innocent kid who certainly has never had the attention of a beautiful older woman before.
The restaurant dss is working in is a Thai restaurant and the manager who is Thai has told her that she is to stay away as I think he probably realises that dss is way out of his depth and will end up getting messed around.
She is in the channel island ffs, there are bound to be rich pickings amongst the sailing crowd, she could do a lot better than dss

OP posts:
PotatoOfDoom · 04/08/2007 10:38

The Channel Islands law isn't that different. And if she did make it as far as getting on a boat/plane to england surely a phone call to customs/immigration could stop her?

zippit · 04/08/2007 10:47

can't she freely travel to the UK and get her own flat?

it sounds like a flirtation to me will probably blow out as quickly as it arose

I have had my ds (19)girlfriend staying here for long periods over the last two years and it wasn't too bad..produced a few laughs...but she is a multi millionaire jet setter from hongkong with parents with homes and businesses in several countries

he is working in a restaurant in hongkong for the summer holidays and she has split with him but apparently he is in the process of starting a liaison with another girl who is at Oxford

meaning that a Thai girl in the Channel islands is unlikely to be at all poor probably the opposite so she could fend for herself...she probably just doesn't want to face her parents and fancies dss

startouchedtrinity · 04/08/2007 10:52

She'll never get entry to the UK. Dh has a mate with a long-term partner in Thailand and she can't get a Visa. Tip off immigration if needs be.

PotatoOfDoom · 04/08/2007 10:57

I thought that as she was only married to a CIslander, she wouldn't be allowed to live in england although she can remain here? Who knows?! Although a tip off to immigration might make her turn tail!

Leati · 04/08/2007 11:01

Carmenere,

Hopefully she is a wonderful person but you are right to be suspicious and protective. If he needs a shoulder to cry on when it is all over, you want him to feel that he has one.

zippit · 04/08/2007 11:16

ah if he is a martial arts man is he thai too?

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