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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

17 year old ds....what is your one like?

40 replies

Doobydoo · 15/09/2016 19:32

I have one of these.Last year of 6th form. 17 very end of August. Just trying to find out what other 17 year old boys are like!

OP posts:
dietstartsmonday · 15/09/2016 19:34

Lazy, grunts alot but does work. Occasionally shows a nearly human side

LadyPenelope68 · 15/09/2016 19:42

Mine takes part in his main sport regularly, goes biking with friends, gym almost daily, sleeps quite a lot, eats me out of house and home, appears to work hard in sixth form. Doesn't always talk a lot, but still hugs me regularly and is all round lovely to be with 😃

Original poster
Doobydoo · 15/09/2016 20:04

Mine is vague! Will talk to us for about 4 hours twice a month in a block and appear animated. Really hard to get info the rest of the time it is like pulling teeth. Spends a lot of time in his room on line with mates...? Could be studying. Just seems to be oblivious of family most of the time.

OP posts:
rogueantimatter · 16/09/2016 17:35

My DS declares everything to be "fine" or "good" when asked. When he was revising for his Scottish equivalent of AS levels he was so bored he would regularly watch the news with his dad and me. He still does this sometimes.

He can be grumpy - at the many injustices of daily life - but is otherwise pretty easy to have around.

Doesn't like being on time for anything though. Why waste five minutes before something starts? This is stressful.

Passionate about his hobby - works fairly hard at it and hopes to make it a career. Which is quite scary.

I get info from one of his friends and sometimes his older sister.

gamerchick · 16/09/2016 17:42

Rarely see him now. College, girlfriend and room when he's here. He keeps me up to date on his life when I do see him though.

Ah to be young and carefree again.

BustingOut · 16/09/2016 17:48

Very active 're sport. Very lazy at home. Messy , disorganised, showers at LEAST 3 times a day which includes complete change of clothes. Eats constantly. Mutters frequently . And listens to the most god awful music.

Phew! I needed that . Cheers op!

Haffdonga · 16/09/2016 18:08

Very very witty. Fairly crude (still thinks farts are funny). Very lazy - lives in a pit of sweet wrappers and dead socks. Actually weirdly sensible when it comes to alcohol etc (only goes to about one in 4 parties he's invited to if he's got homework). Very very very stubborn. Hasn't been seen without headphones in his ears for the last 3 years.

Likes: music, gym, eating, sleeping, eating, friends, gaming, our cat, eating football, sleeping
Dislikes: being told what to do,

MargotFenring · 16/09/2016 20:17

My DS was a great kid, until 16 months ago. He has just run away again without explanation. Police/social services are now involved. He just changed one day, from warm and funny and laid back to cold, selfish, narcissistic, sarcastic, lazy and hurtful.

I wish I knew what the problem was. He is breaking my heart.

OddBoots · 16/09/2016 20:22

Active but not sporty, he will walk miles and do things like gardening and decorating. He's often found on his computer writing or playing computer games or in the studio creating and re-mixing dance tracks. Very slowly plodding through the writing of his personal statement for UCAS but he has decided what he wants to study and where he'd ideally like to do it.

Original poster
Doobydoo · 16/09/2016 22:31

Thank you for replies....a mixed bunch but i spot a running theme re gruntingGrin I am sorry Margot re the issues you are having. Thanks againSmile

OP posts:
entersandmum · 17/09/2016 03:58

Massive heart of gold, but lazy and has no direction or ambition. Left college before his exams and lied to me he had done them. I sent him back after his tutor called me at work to ask where he was, (I am the worst mum ever),.

Speaks to me through his door, unless he wants a game, (I have cut him off, but I see his eyes rolling when I say, 'get a job'.

No interest in getting a job, an apprenticeship, or going back to college.

No interest in doing the 1 chore he has around the house, (washing up). He will leave for 2-3 days until I get really shouty and annoyed.

I have no idea how to motivate him? I've offered a monthly wage to supplement going back to college, an apprenticeship, anything.

user1471734618 · 17/09/2016 04:31

my 17 year old sells weed and steals cars.
He likes SketchUp and doing impressions of people with different accents.
I think he is sleeping on the street tonight.

junebirthdaygirl · 17/09/2016 08:52

Mar got the problem may be drugs as it completely changes their personality.
My ds is past 17 now but this weekend is the first one he didn't come home from college. I miss that grunting constantly eating and showering lad.

MargotFenring · 17/09/2016 09:01

He does smoke and I recently found out he does smoke a bit of weed with some friends, which did not surprise me. He does have aspergers but is highly functioning. The social worker described him as: 'Highly articulate, highly intelligent, confident in his own wants but with an utter disregard for any consequences'.

We know he is choosing to stay with a friend. He won't say what the issue is. Last time he ran off, it was to a girl he liked and she seems to be on the scene again.

He is 18 in a few weeks, we wanted to buy him a car and really celebrate, instead we are looking at supported youth housing and only if we can get him to engage.

Icequeen01 · 17/09/2016 09:17

Mine is just coming up to 17. He's never given us any trouble at all. He doesn't want to even try alcohol (his dad has offered him a beer at home and he spat it out and said it was disgusting!) not sure how long this will last though Smile He spends far too much time on line with his friends and in his bedroom and if I have any worries about him it's that he doesn't socialise much. Hopefully now he's at 6th form and there are now girls he will start to spread his wings a little.

He is a very bright boy who did well in his GCSE's but could have done better if he could have found some motivation! He also grunts and can be quite rude sometimes in the way he speaks to us but will apologise when pulled up in this. He doesn't talk to us much when he's at home but take him out for a nice steak and he doesn't shut up. We seem to get about 3 months' details of what's going on at school etc in 2 hours which usually leaves our heads spinning!

AnotherUsernameBitesTheDust · 17/09/2016 09:29

Horrible to his younger brothers. Spends most of his time in his bedroom with his music on load playing on his phone or reading. Never goes out to see his friends (he went out once to meet someone in the summer holiday, I nearly fainted with shock!)

Doing A Levels at college, seems to be going ok, and enjoys his subjects.

Volunteers at a group for children with SEN which I've heard he's very good at (despite being awful to his youngest brother with SEN)

He's currently looking for a part time job.

Original poster
Doobydoo · 17/09/2016 11:33

Sorry Margot.I am bloody lucky then.

OP posts:
Longlost10 · 17/09/2016 11:38

delightful at home. Nothing I did, but I won the lottery there.

Sparklingbrook · 17/09/2016 11:46

Mostly lovely. He has a part time weekend job, a nice girlfriend, learning to drive and is in Year 13 getting on with it.

Occasional unreasonable outbursts over speed of internet and lack of things to eat in the house etc. Instances of bickering with his younger brother over minor matters revolving around PS4 games.

Longlost10 · 17/09/2016 11:47

He's just popped in with a cup of tea for me, and a suggestion that we go out together this afternoon, there is a guided tour he'd like to book onto for open house.

BackwardElephants · 17/09/2016 11:49

I don't have a 17 year old , but work with a lot of them. I can reassure you that whatever they present at home to their parents ( I know a lot of them too!) at work they are generally witty, polite and hard working! They also generally know when they have let their parents down and they do feel bad about it, despite what they say to you Wink I am sure you are all doing the best you can, and a great job to boot!

SueDunome · 17/09/2016 11:51

My 18yo makes me cups of tea, watches tv with me, cooks his own meals, hoovers for me. I'm going to miss him when he goes to uni next week.

GetAHaircutCarl · 17/09/2016 13:53

I have a (just) 17 year old boy.

He is (mostly) lovely. Very easy going. Very sunny.

He loves football ( both playing and watching), politics, biscuits and stupid YouTube videos.

He likes going out with his mates, especially to gigs and parties ( had a wild old time at music festivals this summer), but he also likes plenty of alone time.

He works hard at school and is very ambitious for his future.

That said he is 17 and also does utterly ridiculous things!!!! He recently dropped his phone in a saucepan of boiling soup Hmm.

LindaDeb · 18/09/2016 06:27

The good: lots of friends, good sense of humour, always laughing and generally fun to be around. Skates everywhere and enjoys quite a few sports, so keeps fit and healthy.

The bad: always partying, drinking, smoking weed. Still thinks vandalising buses, public toilets, school desks etc is fun. Addicted to phone. Sloppiest eater I've ever known.

The ugly: wears his trousers permanently below his bum, and has to waddle around like a penguin. Seemingly has his (useless flat-bill) cap glued on backwards, including indoors. Throws up gang signs all the time.

(BTW, I meant ugly as in appearance, not worse than the 'bad' behaviour!)

All that, and of course the whole other language they speak. To be honest, their lexicon adds so many unnecessary words it can't possibly be described as lazy. For example, yesterday my son said to his friend who was over, "dude, I'm hungry af brah" - I mean, "I'm hungry" would have sufficed...

......good luck on your own adventure!

Karenjenny50 · 21/09/2016 23:11

I'm at my wits end with my 17 yo ds. Smokes/sells weed likely to be other dodgy activities. Won't talk to me about anything. Set up college for him he hasn't gone and he lied about going but I caught him out. Mostly polite but actually horrible friends all like minded. He is never verbally rude to me passive aggressive. He makes me feel desperately sad and I feel love lost him, it's a really depressing situation and I just don't like him. People tell me it's a phase but it isn't it's a life choice.last night I cried this morning I woke up crying. I'm trying to just ignore him as what ever wil be will be but the outcome isn't looking good.