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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

School used plyers to remove earring

35 replies

user1473944236 · 15/09/2016 14:11

Hi I'm new on here but I'd like your opinions on this.
My 14 dd had a small cartilage piercing which her school asked her to remove. As it had been in for about a year it would not unscrew so I advised school I would take her back to the shop to have it removed.
The following day she came home saying the school had manually removed her earring using some plyers borrowed from the tech room. The procedure was painful and caused her ear to bleed.
Am I right in thinking this is wrong on so many levels? Does the school have a right to do this without my knowledge or consent?
Your thought's please..

OP posts:

PovertyPain · 15/09/2016 14:15

Fuck sake! I'd go apeshit! Ok, she broke uniform rules, but they had no right to put their hands on her, that's assault. Who had the bright idea to do that, and was your daughter asked or told it was going to happen?

Arfarfanarf · 15/09/2016 14:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LaurieFairyCake · 15/09/2016 14:20

They don't need your consent, they need hers. Which they got? Did she say it was ok?

I assume they meant it had to be removed before she came back to school and expected you to take her to the shop after school yesterday?

StressedNHSemployee · 15/09/2016 14:40

Or was it the case that they asked DD why it was still there. She explained that it was stuck and you needed to go to the shop. The school then said that they could give it ago and she agreed....

legotits · 15/09/2016 14:43

Didn't you read the policy on piercing in school?

LyraMortalia · 15/09/2016 14:44

I use pliers to remove my piercings when I change them it's standard procedure and what the shop would probably do but the school have no right to. I would be furious but before you go off on one I would firstly check she didn't do it herself/get a friend to do it.

EllyMayClampett · 15/09/2016 14:51

Is it possible that your DD was so upset about being told off, and felt under pressure to get the earring off immediately, that she tried to get it out on her own with the pliers without the school even realising it? I could imagine doing that myself as a teenager.

It's hard to picture s member of staff man handling get and drawing blood! If they have, it is very serious. They need to be reported.

EllyMayClampett · 15/09/2016 14:52

Sorry, typos!

Manhandling her

NNChangeAgain · 15/09/2016 14:55

Does the school have a right to do this without my knowledge or consent?

Without your consent, yes,

without her consent, no

and even with that, they've been very foolish - you're DD could easily file a personal injury claim even if she did consent.

legotits · 15/09/2016 14:55

In ear piercings get waxy.

You need something to grip, it won't have been prized out.
I use the rubber mat thing that opens jars

OhNoNotMyBaby · 15/09/2016 14:56

If she didn't consent, or was coerced, surely it's assault?

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 19/09/2016 11:15

Jesus! No matter whether consent was given or not, this is ABH. Take photos and email to the head, governors and the safeguarding team.

PovertyPain · 19/09/2016 18:55

I doubt that a 14 would be able to give consent to this type of 'procedure'.

Samdensham88 · 19/09/2016 18:59

Id go mad!!!! 😡

ayeokthen · 19/09/2016 19:02

You'd already said you would take her back to the place she had it done to have it removed, it's not like you'd refused to comply. I'd go batshit if someone did this to my child when I'd already said I'd comply.

AnguaResurgam · 19/09/2016 19:02

I think an NT 14 yr old would be deemed competent for this.

So we need OP to return to thread and clarify if her DD consented.

MalodyandJim · 19/09/2016 19:03

I'd go mad! That's assault!

Nooooo that's a whole generation of kids who think they can do as they please as mummy and daddy are backing them up all the way. She/you knew the rules. Unless they pinned her down and pulled it out I'd tell her to suck it up.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 19/09/2016 19:05

Exactly, malody, couldn't agree more.

Floggingmolly · 19/09/2016 19:05

It is not assault . Calm down dears...

ayeokthen · 19/09/2016 19:09

Malody, her mum had already told the school she'd be getting it removed though, so "Mummy and Daddy backing her up" doesn't apply here. Surely it could have been covered with tape before it was removed by a professional?

AdaLovelacesCat · 19/09/2016 19:09

I agree. It does seem a bit draconian but she must have consented unless they held her down.

Floggingmolly · 19/09/2016 19:19

She didn't say when, ayeok. Why didn't she do it on the day she was actually asked to remove it? I'm assuming this happened on Friday, so she had the entire weekend to sort it...

ayeokthen · 19/09/2016 19:20

Fair point FloggingMolly, I just think the school could have used better judgement in dealing with it.

BackwardElephants · 19/09/2016 19:24

Really?

mineofuselessinformation · 19/09/2016 19:24

Was she offered any options?

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