"All teenagers lie"?

[NoNoNoNo]

So is it true? Do even "the best" teenagers with great relationships with their parents tel lies as part of their way of finding independence, and establishing their own identities in the world?

A few years back I would have said that was nonsense, but I'm less sure lately. My eldest tells substantially the truth (I think), but I know he dilutes it now and then. My younger ones are possibly too young to lie yet.

What do you think? Do your teenagers lie about the little details? can we believe them, and in what circumstances?

I think that they all lie, I don't know why really. They don't really want you to know what they get up to. They think we were never their age once !

yes.

Of course they do. Who doesnt lie?

pixie do you have teenagers?My ds lies I think it is their default setting for a while to kind of keep their private life their own iykwim.My ds tells the truth about the serious stuff but white lies are normal for ALL of them!As for him being a person I'll get back to you

meaning what pixie?

All people lie to some extent, manipulating the facts.
Some directly, some because they've been asked a questions and know the answer will upset the questioner. Some by omission.
Depends on the reasons for needing to lie.

I think Pixie is pointing out that they are people still just like we are so it's a little silly to question whether they lie or not.

Did you like your dinner?
Does my bum look big in this?
Where are you going tonight?
Did you eat all the sausage rolls?

Any time you give an answer where you've varnished the truth a little, you are being untruthful to some extent. It's a life skill that enables society to function more smoothly.
Of course there are the Big Bad Lies that are just plain wrong and cause huge harm to others.
I've had to teach my son about the difference between white lies and Bad lies, he still doesn't get it on many occasions.

oh i see. thanks rainbow.

How about "All people lie"? I don't feel that I need to tell the complete and absolute truth to everyone in all circumstances, specially if I think something is none of their business.

So, if teenagers do the same, then I don't think that's so very odd.

The important thing in all relationships is that you don't think the other person is lying in a big way, about important stuff. I have a teen (16yo) - I believe he is basically honest about things like where he is going, and who with, and what they are doing. But I don't expect him to tell me every detail. And I wouldn't be surprised if sometimes he decided to not mention something which has happened, so as not to worry us...

"I wouldn't be surprised if sometimes he decided to not mention something which has happened, so as not to worry us..." I do this to my mum and I'm 48 . I don't think it is lying, though.

I think they call it being economical with the truth.

ds1 could lie for Britain.
ds2 has real problems with lying - he's a bit eccentric and lacks socal skills and seems to have no trouble telling it how it is.
dd is justdeveloping her lying skills.
dd

Agree with goblin and pixie
and lol at poor Riven getting more info than she really wants.

DS2 does occasionally lie about brushing his teeth. Then we are pleased because he has only just learnt how and that makes DD whine yet again about how unfair it all is and how Pagboy gets all the good stuff ... and

Mine doesn't lie. I wouldn't expect her to tell me every minor detail nor would I tell her.

My Aspie lies by omission Riven, and by being sneaky.
He's not very good at it, but thinks I'm a witch because I Always Know.

Him telling the truth at inappropriate times, or answering a question with complete honesty has got him into more trouble (and a couple of detentions) than lying.

My oldest three (two past teenage now) lie and no doubt about it and then try backtracking when they have been found out.
My ds with autism is still learning to lie but hasn't yet grasped that they need to be believable and he shouldn't grin like a cheshire cat whilst trying to lie

at asdx2s Ds

I can tell when dd is lying. She blinks really strangely as she does it.

And she lies about the most ridiculous stuff.

Me: Have you used my hair spray
DD: No
Me: You are lying, aren't you?
DD: Yeah, sorry.

She KNOWS I can tell and she still carries on. She can tell when I am lying as well. I ring her up from work and say I am just going out the door and will be in in 10 mins. She just says 'you haven't packed your laptop away mum, and you will get caught up in something, see you in an hour'

Probably, yes. But not always for reasons of evil!

Some may lie for privacy, but apart from those who are up to no good, a surprisng amount of teenagers lie to 'protect' their parents! Obviously, teenagers are the first people to do anything, EVER, so I am always amused (and actually quite touched sometimes) at what they think adults have never heard of/wouldn't understand/would be confused by and therefore might worry them.

And without a doubt, loads of teenagers lie because they know they're doing things you wouldn't be happy about or that they simply don't want you to know about. I did this, and still do have an inner 'parent-edit' button as adult! Ridiculous, but the way of the world IMO

Cool thanks. That's more or less my experience too. I was just atken by a conversation at work a while back when a colleague was insisting that my son probably smoked, on the basis that she had smoked when she was a kid, and I couldn't take his word for it because "all teenagers lie".

In fact I'm pretty sure he doesn't smoke, though I know he takes the odd drink, and almost certainly fibs a bit about that

Ah there's lies
Then lies by ommision

A lot depends on the questions you ask
Or the ones you choose not to