Right fash-hags, structured/opulence needed...

[WilfSell]

Can't really wear skinny jeans (too fat). But need wonderful one off bling tunic/dress for Christmas [all those parties, sigh ]

Have been wasting money buying lots of crap; now need to spend more but something that will flatter and skim and hold and look MARVELLOUS AND CURRENT.

Can't do clingy; needs firm tailoring perhaps. Floaty would do if skimming but a bit too girly really.

And I am an absolute weeble (is that one of T&S's shapes?) so please DON'T suggest leggins and a bubble shaped top (conical legs are not a good look).

Happy to pay more for brilliance, but bear in mind that most properly expensive shops don't do above a 14 16 and I will need 18 16 depending on the cut.

Do you have industrial good underwear?

I do. I have shares in Spanx. Unfortunately it makes little difference - am still fat. Can sculpt a little though, even if it does just all flow over the top...

wallis have got some v nice shirt dresses/tunics atm, tyhis one for eg with a lovely sleeve

no not shirt dresses, SHORT dresses

Tesco (such fashion taste i have lol) have some funky 'biker chick' tops with all kinds of bling on and interesting back detail ....worn with bootcut trousers and heels this could look quite funky ...? or am I way off?

pretty but I am too norky

you might find your size in-store?

God i love this ASOS maxidress but it's not at all what you asked for. Lots of sparkle on the jewel front needed.

Though when you say weeble, do you mean no waist and good legs? In which case this would be quite wrong.

I know I know boden but a lovely cut and the gathers across the waist v forgiving

Thanks for your suggestions. All very glam. I like the Boden dress and the Wallis ones, the ASOS one just a bit too dressy.

But what I'm wondering is whether fat birds can wear the kind of things you get to see in Grazia. All expensive pleated silk and edgy structures and folds and big jewels. I see people in lovely skinny jeans and clothes from LK Bennett and shoe boots and I just sigh. Fat birds are relegated to bleeding kimono tops and bootlegs.

No, deffo NOT good legs. Weeble means just a cello from the front, a bleeding still pregant lady (even though youngest is 2) from the front.

I suppose I could just try (again) to lose some weight . Again.

pregnant from the side. Obv.

[doh]

Have you tried Phase Eight? they have some beautiful stuff that is well made and classy and they have 25% off at the moment?

Aha. Well, again it's not what you're describing, but God would it look hot with a LOT of jewels again. You could go very big on the sparkly shoes.

Roland Mouret suity type thing

Miu Miu dress. Looks great, but not sure what 'xxlarge' means in designer terms - possibly a 10 but you never know

This dress very pretty pretty rather than glam, but I think it would be v easy to wear in fact

Ah, now, I LOVE that Mouret dress. But when I said expensive I was thinking coupla hundred would be OK as a max for the right thing, not a grand! God it is a fabulous thing though.

I'd have to wear it every weekend for three years to justify it. And I bet their 16 is, er, not.

But getting warmer.

OK, pedalling back House of Fraser/Oasis black dress

this is gorge
saw in irl yesterday - website pics don't do it justice

the colour is amazing, sort of iridescent, the material is luxe without being too shiny shiny satin (and thus avoiding imho the slightly mumsy look you sometimes get from evening shift dresses)
the skirt actually has some sort of seaming/boning in it to give it what I think thay are now calling a "lampshade" shape.
Fashion forward but also quite classic.
Fabric is quite thick so def would hold you in and sculpt.

Would look fab worn with good black opaques - also mega slimming.

I have Weeble tendencies and I have a very similar dress to this (Monsoon) and it looks fab. This is in stock in an F which is a 16/18.

Isabella Oliver Billow Wrap

I think that the colour of this wrap dress is beautiful;
Isabella Oliver wrap

This dress is very structured and would look fabulous with great accessories:
Catwalk Diva Photo Me dress

drapey black might buy for self actually.

Lots of beautiful dresses so far!

What do you think of this one?

I like this coast one too

This is my Christmas party dress, coupled with fabulous jewels and VERY high heels. It's the most flattering dress I have worn in years, I too am a size 14 weeble apple.

I like this too

Ooooh. Lots more. I love LOTS of these: the Day Birger and Mikkelsen one is lovely, and I love the drapey Austin Reed one too. I also love the very fitted one but only comes in a 16 and I know it is gonna be not fitting my capacious stomach a small 16.

I also love that Isabella Oliver one in the tomatoey red and they DO do a 16-18 - I had no idea they did stuff that wasn't maternity.

Some great suggestions here so thank you. And places/sites I would never think of shopping...

This is lovely too!Depending on your norkage