Should I invest in flattering clothes while adjusting to my larger size?

[Sauropodlet]

I have put on 6 stone in the past 6 years and I have gone from a size 12/14 to 18/20 (22 in some shops). I have been reluctant to ‘waste’ money by spending a lot on larger clothes as I have convinced myself that I will lose the weight, however that is clearly not happening. As such I have very few clothes, and even fewer that I feel good wearing or that flatter. It is impacting my self esteem.

Should I just bite the bullet and splash out on some good quality, fashionable larger clothes?

On a side note I have no idea how to dress my larger body (although to be honest I’ve never been great at styling myself no matter what size). I used to be an hourglass but now I’m more apple (huge tummy, boobs and hips but also big bum) so any advice on that front would also be appreciated!

Thank you

At the very least you should get a well fitting pair of jeans/trousers, a couple of tops and maybe a dress that can be worn casually or spruced up a bit to go out in. Everyone deserves some nice, well fitting clothes, whatever their size, imo. You shouldn’t need to spend a fortune either.

I'm in this dilemma. Was size 12/14 8 years ago and now 18/20. Clothes are awful. I see other ladies of my weight and they look so much better but I'm reluctant to buy new clothes because I will lose the weight.

You deserve to take your full place in the world at every size! Buy the clothes.

Also give Laura Adlington a follow on Instagram, she is brilliant

Go on eBay. Search for Marina Rinaldi (Max Mara). Top Italian designer clothes.
Lots on there due to ladies on WLJ.

Buy good quality secondhand stuff - make a list of brands you like then check out Vinted and charity shops in wealthier areas. You definitely should have some clothes that flatter you and make you feel good - but that doesn't mean you have to make a massive financial commitment.

I have changed sizes recently and I am replacing my wardrobe almost costlessly, by selling the old stuff on Vinted and using the money only on Vinted. I'm very much enjoying the thrifty/eco angle of it.

I was a size 22/24.
I buy all my replacement clothes secondhand.
Start with some black trousers and natural fibres if you can. Marks autograph goes up to a 24.
Are you tall OP?

Remember that you can always sell it all on Vinted again if you lose the weight.

I'm similar, but put the weight on slower and recently starting to lose it due to mounjaro. I was an hourglass when I was slimmer but now have massive boobs and stomach. TBH I'm not even sure what my shape is and just feel happy if I can find something that fits!

Yes, I would try to find some key pieces that fit you as you are now. Vinted, ebay can be good. I've also bought from M&S and random bits for nutmeg (morrisons), Tu (sainsburys) and George (Asda). I WFH and rarely need anything like a work outfit, evening dress or anything fancy, so the above have been fine me.

Start with a well fitted bra. I find a V-neck is more flattering along with 3/4 length sleeves. I never wear sleeveless and rarely short sleeves due to arm wobble. I tend to live in linen trouers in the summer and jeans in winter.

EBay is your friend. Work out what styles, brands and sizes suit you and then buy second hand. If you lose weight you can sell them again.

You deserve to feel good about yourself. Get a small functional set of clothes that works well for you.

Due to my mobility issues I've also gone up to a size 20.
My advice is, don't try to hide yourself. Wear colours you love, styles that make you feel good.
I have loved clothes and style and fashion since my first job in a boutique in the 1960s.
I have been all sizes and shapes, worn many different styles and had so much fun.

As I have retired I'm wearing more casual clothes than when I worked. Sweatshirts, cargo pants, barrel jeans and cords. I've loved M&S and Tu recently.Funky trainers and boots and my beloved Crocs.

I also love dresses in bold prints or plain textures, layers of velvet and wool.
A good coat creates a great first impression.
I look for Bella Blue and Wendy Trendy, Toast if I'm feeling flush. Lagenlook for that layered look.I follow idaretobe on Facebook as inspiration.

If you can afford it buy things that catch your eye on Vinted, you can try them
on without the pressure of fitting rooms.

Oh and do not save your clothes for best! You deserve to look good all the time!
obviously we all save something for special occasions but don't have a great looking wardrobe while you wear your scruffs.
Good luck
Good luck and be kind to yourself and be fabulous!

I’d disagree with virtually everybody below and advise you to stay well clear of EBay and Vinted until you know what will fit and suit you. Instead I’d just go somewhere like Marks or even Next and just try a load of things on.

Get a capsule wardrobe off ebay/vinted and splash out on mounjaro thats what I did and lost 6 stone. Now size 10.

I would honestly start by buying something you love and spend money on it. Look at least around John Lewis and try different trousers, skirts and tops until you find something that makes you feel good.

I find that I shop better when I feel good about myself. So I would start by Investing in a nice outfit for yourself and then work backwards from there.

Have a look round the charity shops for decent quality vintage stuff so you can try out new looks without spending a fortune. If you do lose weight, you can re-donate them.

I’ve never been great at styling myself no matter what size). I used to be an hourglass but now I’m more apple (huge tummy, boobs and hips but also big bum) so any advice on that front would also be appreciated!

Aim for things that have tailoring without being tight or clingy. The biggest mistake you can make is buying everything really loose and shapeless - with big boobs, it will just look like a tent. Dresses or trousers with a soft jacket or cardigan over will flatter by breaking up your silhouette. And the biggest favour you can do yourself is to invest in a well-fitting supportive bra that gives you a good shape rather squashed boobs or a mono-boob.

Thank you so much to everyone for taking the time to reply and for such excellent advice. Thank you also for sharing your experiences. I am planning to go out this weekend and at the very least try lots on so I can work out what I like and what suits/fits and then I can take it from there.

And thank you for all the kind words - I have somehow forgotten along the way that I deserve to look and feel good.

Someone asked my height - I am 5ft5.

A few have mentioned Mounjaro - it is definitely something I have thought about but I’m a bit apprehensive. However I know the risks of being obese far outweigh the risks of taking it so I’m going to give it some serious thought.

Get a good bra first, then buy 2 complete outfits that you feel good in. If you lose weight, it's only 2 outfits. If you stay the same you know you've got something to wear. I had the same issue after the baby, not wanting to buy clothes when I was sure I was going to lose weight, but feeling like shit in things that didn't fit.

Yes! You absolutely deserve to feel fabulous, and if your wardrobe isn’t helping you to feel that way then you need some new pieces. Don’t spend your whole life punishing yourself because of a number on a label inside a garment. With reselling platforms you can always rehome pieces if your size changes in the future :)

I would get a capsule wardrobe where everything goes with everything and nice stuff so you feel good.

Recommend Mounjaro- been life changing for me.

💯

Op, i have two close friends who have the same dilemma. Vinted has been a lifeline for them. They picked up some nice well cut pieces for a small budget. They ordered brands they were familiar with for a better chance at finding a good fit. Best of luck! A small wardrobe update will make you feel really good.

Yes, do. I was so much more comfortable without seams or waistbands digging in and looked better so I felt better about myself.

Get on the weight loss jabs. Totally amazing. I’m now a 14, I was a 18 or 20. I wasted a lot of money trying to look huge and stylish. It’s incredibly difficult when you have big stomach that is bigger than your tits. You don’t fit into anything with a waist. I felt horrible every day and in the end, I refused to accept what I’ve become. So I’ve changed via jabs and I’m very happy!

Boden do size 20, as do M&S, if you don’t want to buy second-hand.

Yes get some flattering clothes, best place to start is probably vinted. If you’ve not worn their clothes before as you used to be smaller then older evans clothes are excellent, we’re always well cut and I have done that are about 15 years old now still fine.I’ve not bought new from them for ages after a whole due order where the quality wasn’t good.

I’m an 18 in tops 12 in bottoms and nowadays an apple. I used to be quite a bit smaller especially around my waist but my health has meant I have put weight on.

I cleared out most of my wardrobe out a couple of years ago . I left myself with basics and things that actually fitted and I wear. There’s no point having clothes that are too big or small for me so I’ve only got clothes that fit.

I also struggle massively finding stuff that’s ok.