I’m with your DH here. My thoughts:
- colour dreary
- instep cut far too high leading to a clumpy look and that’s before we get to the wedge
- undefinable something that makes them the summer equivalent of a mum boot
- would be worn by a lady of a certain age matched with cropped white jeans and a floaty “tum skimming” top, the uniform of the middle aged on holiday (disclaimer: I am fat and middle aged)
Alternatives: lower instep, flat or flat-form, no strap at the back, tan not brown