I've just got back from five days in Le Marais, and I've decided I want become Parisian, s'il vous plait.

[TossDaily]

So there.

EVERYBODY looked fantastic. EVERYBODY. DP and I just sat open-mouthed in fascination. Whatever their age, they looked amazing.

So I'm sitting here on a diet, wearing an Isabel Marant jumper and frantically googling 'How to turn French.'

As far as I can tell, the rules are:

1. Be thin, despite the fact you are walking down the street at 11am gnawing a cheese and ham baguette the length of your forearm.

1. Have your hair the colour and texture of natural hair.

1. Have the most amazing skin, despite the fact you have a permanent Gauloise on the go.

1. Never get pissed and lairy, despite the fact you are having a glass of red wine with your lunch and it's Tuesday.

1. Wear shoes you can walk in.

1. Have an amazing coat.

1. Know how to tie a scarf so it looks like you have slung it on and it's just choosing to snuggle up to you because you are SO FRICKING GORGEOUS.

1. Have a pharmacy on every corner that is just an Aladdin's Cave of miraculous skincare delights for less than a tenner each.

Anyone else have any tips? Joking aside, I loved the style - the shops, ohmigod the shops! It was like I'd walked into my internet shopping history.

I could actually walk around in my biker jacket without feeling like a twat.

I want to be French. Aidez-moi.

I'm sad that my thread is upsetting people.

I think the vast majority of posters are posting from a good place, though.

Every thread upsets someone. It's the Mumsnet way.

bo I have some very bright, in your face Chanel reds. I do love the colours and orange based reds brighten my face. I'm not afraid of the colour just a bit afraid of the texture!

Thanks for the you tube link. She is so lovely, gorgeous lips. Mine are nothing like that, but the colour of that lip stick really is Bam in your face. Love it. I have ordered one, let's see if I can carry it off.

I have also ordered a baker boy style cp from village hats. It's a good website.

Someone below mentioned feeling hopeless about wearing mascara because even the waterproof stuff smudges. I would agree, I felt the same until i discovered tubing mascara and now I wouldn't wear anything else, ever. It just doesn't budge until you actively take it off. Even if you rub your eyes like I do and have oily lids. Great stuff.

I use the no 7 brand.

Yes and I am falling down the Violette rabbit hole-thanks

I love Violette's you tube vids. I've got olive skin and long wavy hair but that's where the similarity ends. I'm a fat middle aged Edinburger, a city better known for red trousers and Barbour jackets at the upper income scale or grey tracksuits at the less salubrious end.

Prettybird Have you tried eyelash tinting? I used to have it done all the time and it’s great. You can just use clear mascara to highlight if you want to then. The only reason I stopped was that I’ve never got around to finding anywhere local that does it. It’s brilliant.

You do have a very French look, Auld. The red lip (cause there's only ever one in fashion) looked effortless on you.

Let the perpetually offended be offended, no one ever died from it. An entire thread should not be derailed because one person fails to recognise intent. Moving on.

Toss, has your ballet suit thingy shipped yet? I've not had any updates on my cap, she says impatiently.

Nope - nothing's come yet.

I might have to wait for Christmas to get my mitts on it though. Which is okay, because it will give me more time to reduce my tummy so I don't look like The Hungry Caterpillar in it.

Aww shucks. I have been wearing red lippy for more than 25 years so it doesn't wear me.

You do have to stay vigilant as it can migrate, I don't go out without a compact mirror and apples and red lipstick are a big no no.

For anyone having problems with mascara, I strongly recommend tubing mascara. I have heavy kids and always found mascara a nightmare to apply as invariably it would smudge and result in panda eyes. Tubing mascara is foolproof. It must be removed by warm water to break down the same molecules that keep it in place. I cannot recommend it strongly enough.

• lids not kids!

Yes tubing mascaras are the answer to all mascara problems. They're a Japanese invention and I still feel they do the best. I like Sensai 38C Volume the best but I have a few good ones from Eyeko too, the Skinny one is particularly nice for a natural look and to layer over normal mascaras to get the best of both worlds.

I love this thread - it makes me smile and although I don’t look at all French (Celtic colouring, broad shouldered and a bit overweight) its made me think about how to make the best of myself.

I went on the hunt for a red lipstick yesterday. I’ve got out of the habit of wearing anything other than a neutral lip gloss. I had great fun and eventually ended up buying the CD 999. The assistant was really helpful. I was also tempted by the Mac Lady Danger and a Clinique one which I think was called Poppy Pop. I fell in love with the packaging on the Balmain by L’Oréal lipsticks but couldn’t find a colour I liked although am tempted to try Fever. I’m trying to resist going back to the shops today to visit the Chanel counter!

I felt very swish last night watching tv wearing pyjamas and my new red lipstick. Just need to get the confidence to wear it in public......

Red lipstick is a wonderful thing. I have a lovely Urban Decay one that stays on really well, I wear it on grey days to cheer me up.

I'll need to try some tubing mascara - never heard of it My eyelashes are really short - to the extent that the one time I had eyelash extensions done, they really struggled to attach the extensions. And they made my watery eyes water even more

Never managed to buy my new red lipstick yesterday: ds' rugby overran and then the first train back into Glasgow was cancelled and the next one delayed, so I ran out of time (as it was, I only had 15 minutes turnaround time at home and running both from and to the train ) Fortunately, I had found a bright red Clinique lipstick in my makeup drawer (a freebie one), called Poppy Red I think , so once I'd put my makeup on on the train on the way to my evening out, I felt good

Just go for it craigglen and forget you ever hesitated. If it still feels a tad intimidating just dab it in for that lived in look instead of creating that sculpted look. A lot easier to wear and less intimidating for the daytime.

Indeed cuir, not only are you brightening up your own day with a bit of red but usually others too.

Good to hear you felt good on your outing prettybird. There's one tubing mascara from Japan that's pretty much bomb proof that's supposed to be really good at lengthening, and Asians genetically have very short stubbly lashes so they take it quite serious. It's the Kiss Me Heroine Make Length and Curl mascara, easily bought from eBay or Amazon. The only downside is its bomb proof status, tubing mascaras come off with warm water but you'll probably need to hold a warm flannel on a little longer than normal to loosen it.

I'm intrigued by tubing mascara, as I have quite thin lashes but always wear waterproof mascara. Dyeing them did very little, as they are mostly dark but with fairer ends.

I was at home with a sick child yesterday, so red lipstick seemed a bit much, but I did go for the smoky eye and messy bun. So felt a little chic.

I haven't worn red lipstick in ages, though I used to wear it all the time. I will probably start with a stain/blotting and work up to full on red. I'm probably going to get lost down a Violette rabbithole, botemp!

I just bought Maybelline matte rich ruby. The colour and texture are perfect but I ended up with it all over my face!

I love this thread and have a vast collection of red lipsticks which I am now working my way through. Today I wore my louboutin red (was a gift) to Aldi

The Clinique lipstick I found is called Bright Poppy. No idea if they still do it, but I rather like it having always been too scared of how bright it was before

I watched a lot of Violette yesterday too ! I really loved the tip of not putting foundation on your nose, I tried it today and i look so much better and more natural. I also tried to get some natural texture in my hair, I looked v.unkempt but alluring whilst I took two dc to buy cooking apples even wore my leather gloves

Inspired by this thread I've found an old lipstick queen lipstick of mine in medieval. It's very balmy but is a flattering red on me.

Still looking for a coat.

I wore Chanel rouge coco shine lipstick in Bonheur today. You can build it up to a bolder colour but it’s easy to wear. Good for pale cool white skintones.

Also wearing a deep burgundy polish which I’m very pleased with. Essie Knee high life. No idea if I’m channelling Parisienne style but I feel quite ‘put together’.

My grown out fringe is resembling something like a cool French woman would have so not being able to find a new hair stylist has its benefits.

This person is really good . I want to try an colour app to determine my skin undertone. I went shopping today and looked at the colours of clothes in a totally different light after watching some of her vids.