In the bleak midwinter, frosty Crepes may moan

[Collymollypuff]

Earth stood hard as iron, my heart like a stone.

• and we're expected to do everything!

So is the choc version here!

Oh god Molly, how vile.

Crepeys, DO NOT DO EVERYTHING. Admittedly in my case I am doing virtually nothing and have also cunningly delegated present-wrapping to DD2 who is the only one of us who doesn't wrap like a dyspraxic gorilla in boxing gloves.

MI

Holds poor sick Crepeys,Sad Crepes, crépies sans Bailies, crepsters without baggage, Crepissimi with new knees and Crepes with nose to grindstone. ''Twas the Queue that Never Stopped Forming today. On and on and on. Yawn. Dd home, blatterin away on keyboard, writing God knows what on twitface or something. No mind bending ishhoos as yet, just a small hum of The Unwashed . Trying not to breathe and making subtle comments on use of bathroom., and huge availability of hot water and naice soaps. Deaf/Cloth ears.
Wdod?
Crikey

Oh Crem - Twitter has forever been rechristened. I'm glad she's back safely and hope you succeed in getting her scrubbed down.

Work is over until January. Aaaaaand relax. I came home with an excellent bottle of gin I won in our annual Christmas raffle (well, I actually won Scotch but did a swap with the gin-winner - happy days!).

DH and DS are out this evening, and DDs not hungry, so I just whipped up a piece of panfried salmon and a mountain of buttered sprouts. This is how I would eat all the time if I didn't have a pesky family to feed. The cleaner came today, but you wouldn't know it from the state of the house this evening. I have read the riot act - I will not be spending the next couple of weeks skivvying for my lazy offspring while they loll about in pyjamas eating popcorn and scattering stuff everywhere.

Crepeys - I do hope I wasn't being tactless, saying I've had a good year. Sometimes I worry that I haven't as much to contribute to the chat because, well....I've been alright. The fickle finger of fate won't pass me by forever, though.

Looking forward to catching up with some of you tomorrow. I carried out a quick present audit yesterday and I'm slightly light where DD2 is concerned, so I might hit Lush and Currys PC World in Ye Olde Oxford Street beforehand.

Lovely to hear of returning nestlings.

Found out tonight that every other fucker in my department is on leave tomorrow and Friday. Yes, that's right, I'm the only person in. And have been given a shitload of work that "has" to be done by midday tomorrow. I was terse (to say the least) with my boss. Actually I was trying not to cry. He called me when I was on my way home and we had a terse conversation. He "didn't want to end the year on a sour note." Hip fuckity hoorah. Who, in their right fucking mind, gives every person in the department leave on the same two days without agreeing leave cover? Hope I'm not sick tomorrow. That would be a shame... I am angry beyond belief at the way I've been shafted.

Actually, MrsS, now you mention it, you are looking a bit peaky.

What an arse he is. He should join forces with Colleague I Can't Stand, who is back in my bad books after a row about (wou;d you believe) loo brushes. He nearly had one inserted sideways, I can tell you.

Surely he is the boss? Presumably at whose door the buck stops. So if there is simply not enough resource in the department to do what needs doing, it's his head on the block, not yours. You can only do so much.

CV, please don't feel bad about having had a good year: it would be too glum for words if everyone was having a crap time!

CV, we have actually had a good year too, apart from the bad bits - I'm not being flippant. There's been great joy in among the tough times. DD is happy & thriving, so are all her cousins & friends & that puts everything else in perspective.

Sorry you still face so much anxiety, Rudy & BTM & hope it will be relieved in time.

And yay, Stropps and Crem, hope DDs continue on steadier course.

We're in Germany visiting friends, properly relaxing. Sadly DD has dropped her iPhone down the loo (apparently this happens all the time?) so needs my phone for oxygen or something. I'm lucky to have it for five minutes to post.

Boo to'flu', hope the sufferers feel better before Sister gets back from delivering cloutie dumplings to the poor of the parish, or Questions may be Asked. Quick, someone whip up some hot toddies.

MrsS, maybe it's time you took over responsibility for signing off leave?

Have a good mini MU x

MrsS I think you are running a temperature....

Actually hang on MrsS he wanted you to reconsider your time off between Christmas and NY AND you now find out you are the only one in tomorrow and Friday?!?!?

WTF? I am on your behalf.

Yes, BD. And I was in a meeting today - 16 people. 15 men and me. I said, oh nice to see diversity in action, and was asked what the problem was. The day was going quite well until after lunch...

I haven't had a particularly good year, but it hasn't been as bad as 2014.

Auriga - iphone down the loo is a direct consequence of putting iphone in back jeans pocket. Have nearly done it myself.

Having said that, drunk friend was talking to DH in the pub last year, gesticulating to illustrate some point or other, and dropped her phone neatly into the pint of beer DH was holding at the time.

MrsS I am for you. It's beyond crap.

Mrs S, that's complete rubbish. Glad you didn't consider reconsidering. Re diversity - how much nore deliberately blind could they be?

Auriga, nice to hear from you and glad you are properly relaxing.

My lovely PIL have now arrived. Am v conscious this year that they are getting older and think this is going to be tough on DH. Making decision to be as not irritable as I possibly, possibly can. Time is precious. Nice big family dinner last night but with DD aiming regular darts at me. No idea why - presumably because I am her mother. Is karma - I clearly remember doing the same thing to my mother.

Rudy and BTM - thinking of your and your DSses and family even when don't post specifically.

Last day at work today AND I didn't have to get up at 6.15 to keep DD company and make her breakfast - still lolling around at 7.30. Result already.

Have a good day everyone

MrsS . I want to be a fly on the wall when they appoint these so-called bosses:

"How much of an arse are you?"

"Oh, pretty bloody massive" [self-deprecating drawl]

"When can you start?"

I have had quite a good year too. dm and dmil both seem to have launched into proper old age with gusto and good health. dc both fine if irritating. I know how lucky we are. CV, I read the Lolling While Others Tidy Riot Act too. No visible effect.

Crem, your post made me laugh. Bubble bath in her stocking?

Auriga, glad you are properly relaxing.

Mrs S, I am raging on your behalf. What a tosser! Just get through today and tomorrow, then switch off the phone for 2 weeks and use the time to reassess your options.

Auriga, I am so cheered that you have had a good year . I hope Germany is suitably relaxing for you. Btw, I am writing on an iPhone which enjoyed an unexpected swim in the loo after I'd been out for a coffee which turned into something more refreshing . I thought it was toast but it has survived brilliantly.

Rudy and BTM, . Sending you love and strength.

Bd, last day today. Hurray! So sorry I can't join you for a d and s. Have a fun meet up.

I need to do a Tesco (slot booked months ago), take dd to dentist, make mince pies and wrap presents. Hm. Dh in the dog house for buying dd the wrong phone for her Christmas present. How hard is it? No doubt I will be driving all over s London tomorrow trying to get the right one. Grrr.

My lovely crepes, you have been my comfort and joy over the last year. I am so glad to have met many of you in person and hope to make it a full house next year. Thank you for all the support, advice and kindness as well as all the fun. You are all totally marvellous and I am very lucky xxxxx

I wouldn't wish Christmas 'flu on anyone, MrsS, but your face looks very flushed. (And no, it has nothing to do with the gin you've been drinking)

How VERY DARE THEY???? on your behalf.

I managed to get through to Air NZ this morning. Apparently, luggage is at LAX, and has matched my description/ luggage tag etc, so is hopefully, hopefully on the flight tonight to Auckland. We will then talk again when it's in the country, and we can figure out the best place for it to be couriered (sp?) to.

The boys alternate between telling me to chillax about the whole thing (which I now finally have done) to then asking where the Nurofen/ sun cream/nail clippers/ Christmas wrapping paper is. My response is through gritted teeth, I tell you.

DM Whatsapped me to say she'd had a word with St Francis - patron saint of lost things. I think, bearing in mind what's happened recently, that she has some kind of hotline to 'Up There'.

Had a lovely walk along the wildest beach today, picking up small bits of driftwood and what they call 'Green' aka Jade. Christmas seems a million miles away.

I was lucky in avoiding the Flu, but had the cold from hell during the funeral week. Please please look after yourselves, Crepeys. Submerge yourselves in Berocca, echinacea, and any kind of cold remedy you can lay your hands on. Go to bed, or at least lay horizontal as much as poss. Drink loads. Preferably water. Get some balmy tissues to save the worst of the sore nose.

I'll look in again on you tomorrow.

MrsS, when's the interview for that job you applied for? Your workplace truly does seem to have an abundance of tossers. I think Lalsy has it right..

Addle, I do love your elegant turns of phrase. Good luck with maintaining the low levels of irritability in the face of family provocation.

Auriga, glad to hear you are enjoying a well-earned break and have had a good year overall.

CV, I love hearing about how well your ds is doing at the moment. He seems to be going from strength to strength!

Crem, difficult Re: whiff. Have occasionally had similar in the past here and any overt mention of the lack of freshness merely results in a display of avalanche of rage syndrome from dd. Hope there are bath plans in the near future.

I thought St Anthony was the saint of lost things, with St Jude the saint of lost causes? Isn't St Francis animals? (Might be lost animals, of course. Or perhaps you get both.)

I must totter to my desk. Have risen late after a spot of lolling with DP. He is breakfasting on chocolate cake, which to be fair he did make.

Yep to the phone in jeans scenario. Have done it at home and nearly done it in the BL. Talking of which may nip up there later. What time do the storm clouds gather?

Crem, re whiffitude - a nice medicinal bath oil for an incipient cold/aching muscles/sleeplessness? There is the fab if pricey Olverum, or Kneipp does a cheaper knockoff.

I had Chinese takeaway and cava (and gin) with my oldest bestie and stopped over. I have woken up feeling so much better
We are off for breakfast and then I will head south. Meanwhile dp has made the soup starter for Christmas Day (really hope he's left it somewhere safe to cool as DDog devoured a quarter of a block of butter and licked out the Bertolli tub last night < that's vom face not envy..... I can see that Christmas Day food wise could be erm challenging

MrsS if you are going in only do what you can and make it abundantly plain why things cannot be completed/finished.

Ah, 'mutual lolling' MI. You frisky thing.

Oh my dear crepissimi, I wish I could join you being dark and stormy, but alas DP is visiting his mum (for the last time before Christmas, and possibly for the last time...) so I am on fort-holding duties.

Am bushed after a three-hour rehearsal and two-hour concert yesterday, most of it standing on cold stone church steps. Great fun though - everything from Britten's Ceremony of Carols to Wizzard's Wish It Could Be Christmas Every Day (a sentiment not shared by crepes, I'll be bound). Had an amazing harpist, all long blond hair and long fingers who looked rather like an angel.

Christmas holidays have started in the manner I fear may become a habit - with DS nagging me to a) take him to Kidzania, and b) play monopoly. I have succumbed on point a, but told him to bugger off for a while re point b.

Had a remarkably brisk session of xmas shopping yesterday with DP. Got to Westfield at 9.30, had sustaining huevos rancheros for breakfast, attacked a toy shop, Foyles, Lakeland and John Lewis (some apart, some together) and reconvened at 12 for a cuppa. Done.

Good to hear so many glimmers of light and fortitude through the foulness that has been 2016. I too feel so very lucky to have found my people on the inter web, and think you are all just fantastic. Thank you for all the support and laffs, and I know where to come if I want a pair of cords.