Where am I supposed to shop?

[Goingtobeawesome]

Just back from Bluewater after DH told me to go and buy some clothes. Haven't bought much for ages, completely rubbish at knowing what suits and no clue about what's in fashion. Not fussed about the latter though.

I wanted a bra, warm socks, trousers and maybe shoes.

I've come away with two bras and a woollen dress. I nearly passed out at the bras price but know they are worth it. I'd got into a size 12 pair of trousers in M&S - pure vanity sizing and the 14 was better but then I realised I didn't love them so back they went. Trousers in Next, too flared. Couldn't find any trousers in Dorothy Perkins. Too old for Forever 21, tried Zara, (no trousers to try), H&M (felt much too old and the 14 were too tight. No one to help so didn't bother with the 16), walked in and straight out of New Look and Top Shop. No welcoming assistants and looking at the clientele I felt too old and fat. Tried John Lewis. Could only see designer names and even then I looked but no trousers. House of Fraser, the same really, felt too old or couldn't find anything I liked. Bought the dress in River Island even though I felt too old but was still thinking about it so worth a try. Had to ask for a 16. Mortifying as I heard someone bringing "size six in the black?" and a teenager complaining she'd have to buy the ten.

I am fat, I am struggling to lose weight, I've never been on trend but I do want to look nice. I'm 43 and have a tight budget at present and no idea where to shop.

Any advice would be lovely.

I'm 43 and a size 16/18. People tell me I have a 'style' but I really don't know what it is. I'm awful at shopping. I have shopping 'blindness' often.

Anyway, I shop a lot online. I use Very, Joules, House of Fraser, Next and EBay. At shops I find lots of things I like at Fatface, Phase Eight and Coast. Sometimes pricey but this is where eBay is handy! I like high waisted skinny jeans and high waisted cigarette jeans. I find they hold in my tummy and tops look better.

I love to look of places like Lush but my body shape just isn't right.

Sorry bit too much help there!

Oh and I have a few pencil skirts in thick slightly stretchy fabric in different colours. I like black tops often and a colored skirt jazzes things up with nice shoes.

My favorite one is a red one from eBay with a pretend zip all the way down the back. It holds in all the love handles but looks stylish.

I meant NOT too much help. Looks like I'm blowing my own trumpet otherwise! I'll stop posting now.

I'm 45 and size 14. I find work clothes from Jigsaw, Me and Em and Phase 8; casual clothes from Fatface, White Stuff and Howies (online, unless you're in Exeter).

I went in Fat Face as I have a lovely two year old skirt from there. It was all pyjamas and jumpers .

I mainly live in jeans but atm they aren't suitable. I just want to be warm and comfy but I'm always such a scruff.

Thank you replying .

What's your lifestyle? I must admit that I've pretty much moved over to the idea of a 'uniform' and repeat buy the same sort of things anyway, so now I'm just upgrading them to better versions.

SO - in Autumn/Winter I pretty much live in black skinny jeans, boots and either a black or grey t-shirt, black turtle neck or black or grey jumper. So I've upgraded to M&S Autograph black skinnies, and to cashmere jumpers (bought in sales). I have a couple of nice 'going out' tops, generally in black, and nice heeled boots to dress the skinnies up. I rarely go anywhere that needs anything dressier than jeans and a 'nice' top, but have a couple of LBDs for if I do.

For work, I do similar - live in either black slim trousers and a black jacket, or a black or grey pencil skirt and jacket or black or grey jersey dress and jacket. I tend to wear scarves or herringbone or lacy tights if I want to feel as if I'm not always wearing the same thing but, tbh, I'm caring less and less if people think I'm rotating the same things.

Unless you're looking for party wear or Christmas jumpers it's not the best time to shop. You may be better off in February after the sales.

I'm your age and shop in a variety of places-gap, johns lewis, jigsaw, Fatface, white stuff, zara etc.

If you can afford the initial outlay you may be best to do a big online order of trousers and try in your home. John Lewis will have lots of different brands to try. Or if you have a next directory you can order and return and then just pay for what you keep. That way you could try a variety of shapes and sizes.

I'm currently wearing the same stuff over again as I have put weight on and have lots of clothes which don't go with anything else.

I'm a SAHM but three times a week I volunteer and while I can wear jeans I sometimes wish I could feel smarter.

I'm feeling a bit low tbh and today's shop just made me feel worse.

I'd love to wear more dresses but have awful legs but after today I'm looking at dresses with thick tights and knee high boots. Money is tight at the moment so I need to make the right choices.

The problem is your confidence more than anything.

Try dressipi website. It's free and it's asks you lots of questions about your body shape and style and then it finds current items that will suit you.

Thank you chanie44, that sounds like something that could help me.

Please trust me on this.
Order this and this

Forget about the trousers. I know they look weird, but trust me, order them and try them on.

Oh, get the medium in both. :)

I've just filled it in. It looks like a good site but it shows ££££ choices!! Will be good for getting me out of a rut, thank you.

I get lots of my clothes from Wallis. I buy the youngest, most fashionable things in the shop I think, most of it is frumpy, but 1/4 is nice. Sizing is a full size out (generous). It's all cut for not 19 yr olds which makes the whole experience a bit less depressing.

I quite like the first one, Agb. It's reminded me I have a tunic top/dress from Wallis that I haven't worn for ages as I need some leggings to go under it.

RJ - I went into Wallis today. Looked like a jumble sale and I couldn't see any order at all. Didn't see a single pair of normal trousers. I'm really wanting to go down the dresses with thick tights and boot look though. Easy to wear and more flattering. I need to get some thicker tights.

I've just joined dressipi. I'm liking it. Similar problems to you op except nothing at all fits post dc3

I'm really hating myself at the moment. The scales say I'm a lot fatter than the mirror but I guess scales don't lie.

I just don't have any motivation. The last few months have been stress after stress and I can't get myself back to normal.

Don't be silly, you're just tired and overstretched by the sound of it. Be kind to yourself.
Can you get a haircut, that also helps :)

I so need a hair cut. It was done in August but before that not for about a year. I don't have anyone I use at the moment but it's on the list of things to do..

I love Cos. Als

I don't have favourite shops but I go onto websites and sort clothes by colour and buy the best things I can afford in them. So I only buy three colours. Mu accessories are those same three colours and sometimes have a completely different colour pattern on them, if you know what I mean!

I own a few great, fairly expensive bags. A dozen great scarves that go with everything. Shoes that go with everything. I only wear midi and maxi skirts. And a wardrobe of clothes that all 'go'. Make sure the hair nails and make up is good too

I don't care what anyone says about having lots of interesting and colourful clothes - I have a palette and I stick to it and look ok I think!

ps you aren't fat

According to the nurse's chart I'm obese.

At a size 12-14?!!!!

I'm 43 and a size 16/18 too. I shop at the same places as harry.

You need to work on that positive attitude and figure out what is going to flatter you. Otherwise everything is going to look rubbish to you however it really looks.

I've had a a seriously shit year with ongoing health problems and stress but I have lost 3 stone from it and had to buy a new wardrobe. To me, a size 14 is not fat. Yes, it's not thin but it's not enormous I promise.