Calling all those whose babies have refused to be put down to sleep......

[CantSleepWontSleep]

Can you tell me at what age you finally could put them down and not have them sleep on top of you?

And did this happen because you found a new technique to try, or was there nothing in particular that you did to influence it?

Ds now 7 weeks and wakes within 2 mins of being put down virtually every single time. My arms would really like a rest, and I'd just love to look into ds' crib at night and see him sleeping there instead of in my arms/across my chest.

Same story day and night.

DD is currently back to this at 10 months however, we cracked her out of it once at about 4 months.

csws, i'm going to speak but i'm in no position to really as dd1 was a good sleeper. dd2's proving a bit different so far, though, but only insofar as she was so teeny when she was born that i couldn't really have put her anywhere but my chest. for a few weeks this deffo meant that she would only sleep on my chest, in the pram when it was moving or in the sling, and i was beginning to get a bit worried. she would not sleep in the hammock, and it had been such a success with dd1...

anyhoo, she has a dummy,i've found that cherry ones are better than the flat ones. being rolled up tight makes a difference but the main thing that's happened recently is that i've started putting her to sleep on her side rahter than her back. i figured i'd try this as she sleeps on her side or stomach when she's on us, iykwim? anyway, it's made a huge difference to her staying asleep and putting herself back to sleep. could be developmental or a coincidence, of course (corrected dd is the same age as your ds)but ive seen a big difference in the last week.

if you don't have a hammock i'd suggest swaddling and putting his waist in the middle of a rolled up towel so that he can't roll onto his tummy by mistake, of course.

PS CANNOT believe you've got another non-sleeper btw. my sympathies.

have u tried swaddling?

dd4 wont sleep apart from me (yet??!!), but loves to be swaddled and have had some success with saddling and bein in the pram during day. oh and a dummy (tonmmee tippee ones which i've known find ut are discontinued). but at night sleeps in my arms

yeh swaddling worked for DD - although beware that it may mean you HAVE to swaddle from them on. It took about a week for DD to get out of being swaddled.

We used to have huge problems with DD sleeping in her cot at night - would go to sleep but wake up within five minutes then take ages to settle then wake up within five minutes etc. Two things that made a huge difference were cranial osteopathy (think it took around four sessions) and me cutting out most dairy from my diet (exclusively breastfeeding her).

oh yes anglepoise, dd2's settling does seem to have also coincided with an appointment at the CS osteopath. it was she who recommended letting dd2 sleep on her alternate sides.

ummm. I could put dd down at about 12 months. She's 16 months now.

She progressed from sleeping with my nipple always in her mouth, to sleeping nestled into my side, to sleeping a few inches away from me, to being putdownable once fed / rocked to sleep. But as a rule she wakes after 40 minutes once put down. She still wakes many times a night. I counted her wakeups a few nights ago, for fun. Seven, and that was an average night, better than the recent teething experience. I haven't done anything, just let time take its course.

But it is progress. She was a complete velcro baby like yours and was utterly, utterly unputdownable. People with good sleepers do not believe that some babies are made like this.

I do sympathise.

yowza, vlc. i sympathise right back atcha.

A tip my mum read in a book somewhere was that it's the vertical distance that you transfer them through which wakes them up. DS was the same way at 2 months when she was visiting, and we had to rock/cuddle/pace around with him on the shoulder to get him off at that age. He was sleeping in a Fisher Price rocker in the reclined position (slightly refluxy and this helped) so we'd put that up on the bed to transfer him, then transfer him onto the floor in a separate movement. The book also said you have to hold them for 5-10 min after they nod off to make sure they're in a deep sleep before the transfer. HTH.

you know, that really does make sense to me about the vertical. because presumably it's affecting their balance internally... the more i think about it the more i think dd2 sleeps well in the hammock if she's more prone already, but rarely makes it from the sling to the hammock iykwim? really interesting, ches.

Aaaaaarrrrggggh - not quite the encouraging responses I was after. You were all supposed to say that you couldn't put yours down at 7 weeks, but that at 8 or 9 weeks it had just clicked and they'd gone down fine!

Anglepoise - ds is milk intolerant, so I'm dairy free already.

We've seen a CO already, and are now seeing a homeopath [desperate].

On the rare occasion that we've managed to get him down for more than a couple of mins, he has been swaddled, but even swaddled tightly he normally wakes.

He did sleep on his tummy for a couple of hours 3 or 4 times, but that was before we were totally dairy free, and I think it helped to ease his pain. He's not even interested in sleeping like that any more.

We've tried putting him on his side a few times, but again never lasted more than a couple of mins.

I wouldn't mind so much if he was a pfb, but poor dd is being neglected as well as the house, and dh has to start going away for work again tomorrow, so there won't even be anyone to share the holding.

I know aitch - I definitely ordered a good sleeper who could tolerate milk this time, but something obv went awry with my paperwork!

I think I'll wait until his cold has totally cleared, and then get tough and consistent with the swaddling.
[knows will cave at first whimper from ds]

I keep banging on about my brilliant battery-operated swing but it was fantastic. It gave me a rest from my newborn in the early evening so that I could cook and put the toddler to bed. Sometimes I could even eat my own dinner, too! She'd wake up within an hour or hour and a half in the swing and I'd put her to bed properly (or try to) but it provided respite at a bad time of the day.

Oh, you poor thing CSWS. I have a poor sleeper who has finally at 14 months learnt to go to sleep in his cot after a lot of work. It's putting me off having another one at the mo, as he still wakes several times a night. I have found, though, that white noise has saved us on many an occasion. It doesn't always work, but sometimes it does. We either use the crackle on the radio or we bought a CD of washing machine noises. We put it on louder than you would think was comfortable initially to send him off, then turn it down to a gentle hum after a while.

Also agree with holding them for a while whilst their lying down, but know the answer will not be that simple.

Chin up. x

Mine got better after her 2nd set of injections made her sleepy and she slept in her cot for more than 20 minutes for the first time ever - as if she realised it wasn't that bad actually. She suddenly slept for 3 hours at a time in there, bliss!

Saying that, we only managed between 5.30 and 7.30 in the cot last night and she's been on me all day so far. So it isn't consistent!

Oh and she's 4 months old now.

Small tip that i stumbled upon. I only discovered at about 3 months that when I put ds in his cot, if he startled, holding his arms against his side whilst putting my forearms over his legs acted like swaddling and would often get him through the intial couple or minutes when he tends to wake himself up. I count to 50 breaths and if all seems still back away. Doesn't work 100% of the time but might be worth a try.

Lots of sympathy though, I am still struggling: DS will go down at night but not in the day. He is sleeping on me as I type this!

Dummy & swaddle? Currently trying this for first time today with my 7 week old and it does seem to work. He has always slept on his tummy in the cot as that's how he's always fallen asleep on me so easy just to slide him accross like that and in the night I'm afraid he still goes down like that after feeds. He's a big chap and can lift and turn his head from side to side so my instinct says he's safe. Having said that it doesn't really seem to work in the day for some reason and as I have a toddler and he is big and carrying him around in the sling is killing me, I've just had to try and get him to nap somewhere else apart from me and sling. So far, am pleased with dummy and swaddle although it has taken me over an hour to get him to nap for 30 mins.. My DD loved her dummy and it worked like a dream so hoping DS will take to it equally well. Took it away at 7 mths with no problem.

I always wished I'd been a better swaddler.

I had the sense that what was waking mine up sometimes was flinging their arms out and startling themselves.

are you trying a dummy, csws? it's not the loveliest thing but i do find that when dd2 wakes up five mins into a nap popping one in makes her settle again. cherry a must, imo, much less like work to keep it in there.

Tried one Aitch and he was less than enamoured. Bought another today, but still not cherry I don't think. Dummies are a whole new world for me to discover .

Another friend swears by this to induce sleep. Anyone else claim success with anything similar?

dd2 doesn't like silicone and flat, she likes latex and cherry. not my heart's desire to give her a dummy but it has helped enormously with that transition off the breast and into bed.

At 3 weeks I learnt to feed lying down and we coslept, saved having to transfer my ds after a feed as he always woke if I moved him. At 8 weeks we managed to get him into a bedside cot with me continuing to feed lying down half in his cot half in my bed. This fooled him for a week or so but then he stopped sleeping after a feed and would lie there wide awake until he got bored and started crying this is when we discovered he would sleep better on his tummy. So I now do all the feeds sat upright in bed and then transfer him into the cot once he is in a deep sleep. If he wakes up dh holds himover his shoulder while bouncing on a gym ball.

He's 3mo now and we just discovered he was waking up every hour because he was too hot. So heating off and no more blankets over the grobag.

Well after spending 5 hours trying to settle ds last night (he wouldn't even sleep over my arm) I have been out this morning and bought cherry soothers and the vtech lullaby machine. Now if I was only awake enough to focus to put batteries in...