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Sleep

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Original poster

What would you say to neighbours complaining about your baby crying at night?

36 replies

zuzkah · 01/09/2008 10:10

Hi there. We moved recently in a private block of flats and put our ds, 9 months old, into his own room. So it was the change, teething, being ill and coping with no more bf at night (not all at once but within a month) that was disturbing our ds's sleep. He would wake up and cry 2-3x a night, we would go to him to calm him down. Mind you he is getting better and sleeps well some nights. He cried once 30 min. the longest. Then one day the secretary of the building knocked on our door to asked how is our ds doing. She was nice about it as she has a daughter. However, she came as some people were complaining to her about our baby crying at night. What would you say to these neighbours?

OP posts:

butterflybessie · 01/09/2008 10:12

babies cry and here are some earplugs

bethoo · 01/09/2008 10:14

just say there is nothing you can do. i can only imagine that the people who complained have never had a baby?!!

stripeymama · 01/09/2008 10:14

Fuck off?

LaTrucha · 01/09/2008 10:14

I would go round and explain the situation. A baby crying is a normal part of life and most peope would respond well to this, I think. Would take a bit of a 'gulp' on my part though.

In other words, I think they are being unreasonable to complain but probably could be made to be reasonable again.

If all else fails, ask them to babysit for the night and go and sleep at their house

LaTrucha · 01/09/2008 10:15

oh, yes bethoo - by 'explain' I mean say there's nothing to be done. Babies cry. Full stop.

KerryMum · 01/09/2008 10:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Oliveoil · 01/09/2008 10:20

well personally I wouldn't leave a child to cry for 30 mins in the night

a baby crying is REALLY ANNOYING when it is your own, can you imagine if you were young free and single and heard it in the middle of the night for 30 mins??

not that there is anything you can do as they don't come with an off/mute button...

we used to bring dd1/dd2 into our room and didn't leave them to cry as we knew it would annoy the neighbours

KerryMum · 01/09/2008 10:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nailpolish · 01/09/2008 10:22

i would go round and explain

but i wouldnt apologise

2point4kids · 01/09/2008 10:25

Olive - I dont leave my children to cry at night, but even so they did sometimes cry for 30 mins with me trying to comfort them anyway.
The OP didnt say she left her baby to cry, just that he had cried for 30 mins.

HereComeTheGirls · 01/09/2008 10:26

Babies sometimes can cry for 30 mins even if you are there trying to calm them down, if they are teething, in my experience.

welshdeb · 01/09/2008 10:26

They are being unreasonable. I am sure you would prefer undisturbed sleep too!!!!!

Tell them babies tend to cry. As I understand it noise control officers dont consider babies to be a nuisance. In a few months it will all be a memory, and in the meantime they can buy some earplugs and if they dont like it they can move.

HereComeTheGirls · 01/09/2008 10:26

snap, X-posted!

Oliveoil · 01/09/2008 10:26

not if you ram a bottle/boob in they don't (ime)

Becky77 · 01/09/2008 10:27

I agree with OliveOil... Plus people have jobs to go to and if they aren't used to interrupted sleep it can be extremely difficult to cope with.

I'd go round and apologise and explain the situation (ie teething, new room etc) so that they realised it is not an ongoing thing. It'll help them feel more in control of the situation and less stressed by it

ParCark · 01/09/2008 10:28

Message withdrawn

nailpolish · 01/09/2008 10:28

i would be annoyed with a baby crying next door but i certainly wouldnt make a complaint about it.

olive - i think your memory is hazy

nailpolish · 01/09/2008 10:29

people have jobs to go to - arf

thats flat living - so toughen up.

2point4kids · 01/09/2008 10:30

I would go round and say sorry that they are getting disturbed but that babies cry and it cant be helped. Ask them if they've tried ear plugs.

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 01/09/2008 10:30

ask them if they would like you to gag him! wtf? your neighbours sound lovely.

2point4kids · 01/09/2008 10:32

bottle/boob doesnt cure everything!
ds2 had colic for 4 months and nothing on this earth would stop him crying.
Now he is teething and same thing!

Basementbear · 01/09/2008 10:33

We live in a converted house, the walls and floors are paper thin and you can literally hear the people upstairs sneeze! During this time we have had 2 newborn DCs, who both cried ALOT. I know the neighbours must have found it really annoying since none of them have children. I couldn't deal with a face-to-face confrontation so I wrote a letter to them, explaining and asking for their understanding! (Like everyone else says, don't apologise - it's what babies do!).

Afterwards, when I did bump into the neighbours they were all ok about it. Don't feel threatened by it, afterall there is nothing that you or they can do about it, and it will pass!!

zippitippitoes · 01/09/2008 10:33

well i wouldsay im sorry obviously we have done our best to comfort the baby for his own sake too but sometimes he is hard to settle

i have had babies cry for hours tbh despite rocking feeding putting down picking up etc

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 01/09/2008 10:38

my neighbours had to cope with a crying dog on friday night. they asked dh the next if everything was okay and he explained that the dog was very ill but we are doing our best to help her and were up with all night trying to comfort her.

i thought they would be really annoyed as they hate my cats and are not really animal people. they brought around a big bone later that day for her and wished her well. some things cant be helped as long as you are not causing the upset with loud music etc. your neighbours if they are reasonable people should be inderstanding.

the only time i was ever bothered by noise in flats was when my upstairs neighbours' builders took to playing frank sinatra on repeat for hours at a time. its just one the things you have to put up with in flats.

teenymummy · 01/09/2008 10:38

I have the same problem at the moment, we have just moved and have got some fuddy duddy neighbours next door. I dont leave my little one to cry but when he wakes up in the night it still takes a bit of time to make the bottle etc and in that time he is screaming his little head off. I feel so guilty over it but my family and friends just keep reminding me that that is what babies do, and us parents have to live somewhere at the end of the day! I do feel bad still though and I have been round to explain that he is teething at the moment but I wasnt greeted/spoken to with any warmth. I'm just not going to bother worrying about it anymore! He will eventually grow out of it and the neighbours will just have to understand for the time being that I'm not letting him cry just to be malicious!

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