Is a 9 to 10pm bedtime suitable for a four month old?

[sweetbabyangel]

Hi everyone, forgive the probably very stupid FTM question, but looking for some advice about bedtime please. My LO is 4 months old and I currently put her to bed between 9-10pm. I know this is significantly later than many others, but it suits my partner and I for her to wake up slightly later (8-9am) as my partner works very late nights so we have never transitioned away from our newborn schedule of late nights.
My question is whether this is likely to harm her sleep? Do babies naturally want to go to sleep earlier and are we therefore working against her natural body clock by keeping her up late? Or do most parents just enjoy getting their children to be nice and early to make the most of their evenings? The other consideration is that, in about a year, she will be starting a couple of mornings ay nursery, and so we will have to look at adjusting the schedule then, so that she’s able to wake up earlier for nursery. Thank so much in advance for your advice.

Do what works best for you, especially at 4 months old!
there is no right or wrong way to do it. I honestly don’t think it will make much difference to her sleep patterns, there is plenty of time to adjust it if needs be.

I did read once that a later bedtime is detrimental to their development, so I wouldn’t do it.

If it were me, however, and I was at my wit’s end stressed to all hell with an eg 7pm bedtime, then maybe I would justify it to myself as “my stress is more harmful to my baby than a developmental disadvantage”

All the aside above, you’re going to have to get on with an earlier bedtime at some point as you point out, so may as well get it solidified now (albeit the four month regression is likely just around the corner)

My 4 months old all went to sleep when they feel asleep. In the evenings that was on us in the couch as we watched telly. We then put them into the cot/bedside thingy when we went to bed.

They now (15,12 &7) go to bed at 9 pm. Even when we aren't they they will take themselves off to bed.

My DS1 slept 9.30-8.30 all the way through as a baby in the summer (Feb born), this became 8.30-7.30 in the winter, and then was easier to move to 7.30/8pm when he started at nursery. If it works for you, then don't worry.

Do what works for you. I doubt any kids in the "siesta" countries have been harmed by late bedtimes!

When you say keeping her up, do you mean you're stopping her napping? We were honedtly still just feeding, napping, waking up in their routine and then when we we t to bed, the babies came with us given they shouldn't be put down in a room without yo ust that age. Is she actually eeping through til that time or do you mean her morning wake up is that time?

4 month olds can go to bed whenever, they haven't got to get up for work in the morning and are free to nap as they see fit too!

Oh, just do what works and gets you all some good sleep!

Alot of babies have later bedtimes, no harm whatsoever, poppycock to say otherwise

We kept DS with us in the evenings until he was 6 months and then did bedtime whenever we went to bed. Sometimes he slept on us, sometimes he was awake. I don’t think it really matters at that age.

At this stage they often keep changing/waking at different times, but if something is working for you and them, do it as long as you can.

You do what suits you and your baby. I never had any set bed time with mine and he grew up fine.

Are you keeping her up / stopping her from sleeping?

No, not as such, just encouraging a later schedule by allowing her to nap until 7/7:30 and not doing bedtime routine until gone 9. She seems okay with it… maybe a little overtired by bedtime some nights, but she’s still getting the recommended number of daytime and nighttime hours.

DD1 was a midnight-to-bed baby until about 2 years old. I received a ton of criticism about it, but would then ask the person what time their child went to bed/woke up. The same sleep time, but I didn't have to wake up at 5am.

I think a lot of people think that the adults need the evening to themselves, but we agreed we'd much rather have a lie in.

Do what's right for you, your family, and your baby.

This. I couldn't have coped with 5am wake ups.

We did bath about 6.30 then bed/story at 7 worked for us till school then everything went out of the window lol

Do what works for you. Mine went to bed later, well adjusted adults now

Well that's very late really and the whole point of putting to bed earlier is so they can get the longer hours of sleep needed. So, 7pm to bed and waking at 5am is 10 hours hopefully asleep and any later is a bonus. Bed at midnight, does this mean they woke up about 10am? Was this your 'lie in' every day?

This is very unusual as most parents have to be up and out to go to work by 7.30am/9am so the earlier bedtime routine is necessary.

This was how sleeping through the night at 12 weeks was achieved when 12 weeks was the goal. Absolutely the way to go. Does not stop you introducing earlier bed times as they get older and the days shorten in the autumn.

Personally, we did a lot earlier, 7pm, so they could get a longer sleep, which is what babies need. They were tired by this point anyway so being in bed was best for them.

Also, we had to be up early for work so 5am waking up would've just been an hour earlier anyway, more time to take morning routine slowly, take dog out for longer walk etc.

I couldn't justify putting to bed later, it would mean waking up to change nappy, put on bedsuit, just for the sake of an extra hour in bed.

Sounds like she’s sleeping 11 hrs
at only 4 months old. Don’t change anything if that’s the case!
Save the earlier nights for when they have to get up for school. Right now, do what works for you. Happy parents = happy baby.

Do whatever suits you. Routines change all the time at this age and basically if you can get baby to sleep then that’s what you with.

Whatever works is just fine.

Babies don’t know the difference between night and day, just go with the flow while she is this age and establish a routine as she gets older

How long is she sleeping in the night? Does she still wake for feeds? What time does she wake if she's going for longer sleeps?

I think my baby (now 13) was still pretty much waking every 3 hours for feeds night and day at 4 months. While "daytime" feeds he'd often stay up after and "night-time" feeds we'd try to get him back to sleep, it was pretty patchy so when the last "day-time" feed or first "night-time" feed was didn't really matter.

If she is actually sleeping for long chunks at night, and has a "nightime" after the midnight feed, I might try to move it back to prepare for when she needs to get up for childcare etc.