Desperate mum - 15 month old won’t self settle

[Bodear]

Hi all, my 15 month old has never been a good sleeper but it’s got worse and she won’t self settle at all. She’ll only go to sleep with me touching/ holding her. She wakes sometimes every hour and I need to get her self settle.
I don’t want to go down the cry it out route or co-sleeping.
What can I use as a distraction to get to sleep without screaming if I’m not touching her?

Single bed (well floor bed) was fine for DS from 15 mo @Nettleskeins as I stopped being able to successfully put him back down in the cot on the low setting as he was so heavy. Meant I could roll away for a bit of an evening, co sleep when needed etc.

He's in a 'normal' single bed now at 2.5. Room for me just about when needed, hasn't fallen out in months! We're on a very very gradual retreat process for bedtime now. How he settles in the night depends on a lot of things and sometimes he just needs a pat, or a drink. SOmetimes he grumbles enough to wake me on the monitor but doesn't need me.
Some nights he needs/ wants me in there with him.

But i'm really a far gentler parent than I ever imagined