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Sleep

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Original poster

Does anyone just put their DC in bed and walk out??

32 replies

grounddown · 27/08/2013 10:52

Really?
DS is 7 months, he needs rocking and feeding to sleep, people keep telling me to put him down and walk out but does anyone actually do that? I fed DD to sleep until she was 9 months old and it stopped working, luckily she learnt to self settle quickly. We have issues with her more now at 2.
DS is currently shattered in his cot shouting, I can't see sleep coming any time soon but DD won't leave me alone long enough to settle him.

OP posts:

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Mosschops30 · 27/08/2013 10:56

Yes I do, they're older now and we went through some dodgy phases but that was my aim.
I'm a self soothing believer

Original poster

grounddown · 27/08/2013 10:59

It's happened, hes asleep!!!! No crying, just shouting. Wow. Bet this never happens again.

OP posts:

wannabedomesticgoddess · 27/08/2013 11:01

Yes I do. It has served me well with DD1.

DD2 is a little different. She still feeds to sleep. But in breaking that habit now at 9months I am putting her down and walking out. She cries. I go in a while later and put her back down. My aim is to put down and walk out, its hard with a young baby though.

Original poster

grounddown · 27/08/2013 11:02

It is hard, hurts your heart.

OP posts:

MortifiedAdams · 27/08/2013 11:05

I do with DD. I work lates and knew DH would have to do half the bedtimes so her being reliant on me/my milk for bed would be a challenge on my return to work. I kept this in mind from the beginning.

Not saying we dont use any crutches - DD needs her soft toy and a couple of dummys to see her through the night, but she goes down awake for all sleep and naps and has done from day dot.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 27/08/2013 11:06

There are different cries. Hysterical and I have to go back in, its just cruel not to. But mostly its just tiredness and then I know there's nothing I could do anyway, if she needs to sleep she needs to sleep.

PattieOfurniture · 27/08/2013 11:08

With ds1 we stayed with him til he was asleep and we still do now as he won't sleep unless we're there and he's nearly 8!
We vowed not to do the same with ds2, unless he was upset or ill. Since birth we put him to bed and leave him, 95% of the time he goes to sleep on his own no fuss.
I wish we'd have done that with ds1.

Original poster

grounddown · 27/08/2013 11:12

I definitely agree on different cries, there is a definate 'I'm tired' whinge.

OP posts:

Safyre · 27/08/2013 11:14

DS is almost 1 and at nights gets a bottle (downstairs with us), gets bathed (if it's a bath night) and put into his pyjamas and then goes to bed with his dummy and his bear, and some lullabys playing. He's never been fed to sleep. He is the same during the day for his naps - gets put in his cot with his dummy and bear and left to go to sleep.

It would never have occurred to me to do it any differently. Yes, some nights he cries for a wee whle (rarely more than a few minutes) and some nights we have to go back up and resettle him because he's bouncing in the cot, but mostly it works.

Like wannabe said - if he's hysterical, we'll go and get him. If he's just tired, then getting him up just keeps him awake longer.

Vajazzler · 27/08/2013 11:24

Yes I do. Always have. I did the bath/feed/story thing from very early then into grobag, kiss goodnight pop them into bed and I was off! From birth I never did the rocking to sleep thing. Once they were fed and changed and snuggled they went into the Moses basket and didn't know any different.

brightonbythesea · 27/08/2013 14:30

I do. And I'm very glad I started doing it, it saves me a lot of time!

95% of the time she will chat/gently moan and then fall asleep within 10 minutes or so. Occassionally she goes crazy (usually when OT) in which case I will return to her, check nappy etc, give her a cuddle then put her back down.

She won't be rocked or fed to sleep if I try so there's no point, she just gets worked up when she is intefered with.

teacher123 · 27/08/2013 15:12

Yes since DS was four months old (16mo now). He stopped feeding to sleep and won't be rocked/cuddled to sleep etc. Sometimes he whinges for a few minutes, sometimes he goes silent immediately and just goes straight to sleep.

LittleMilla · 27/08/2013 16:16

I have a qu for the people that did it from birth. Did you babies just drift off without any crying?

I have an almost 6 week old that has been wired from day 1 it seems. Tried hard to just pop him down but he'll instantly start crying after a few mins. I'm now using a dummy and white noise as a way of not rocking him - he doesn't seem to like being fed to sleep! But even that is hit and miss.

This is ds2. First one was left to whinge from about 9 weeks but I thought him not nodding off was perhaps me installing bad habits. We've tried to do things differently this time but it's not really working!

LittleMilla · 27/08/2013 16:19

Btw - my ds1 is now 2.4 and has been left to his own devices since about 12 weeks.

I just wondered if babies exist that don't have to be cajoled in any way to sleep. Dh thinks they're a myth and I get worked up for no reason trying to make ds2 one of them!

Vajazzler · 27/08/2013 23:19

TBH i did it from birth. All 5 of mine were swaddled. I dont know if it made a difference or not but once they were fed, changed, fed a bit more, winded etc, they were swaddled fairly tightly and popped into their moses basket. There was occasional fussing but no actual crying. Eventually as they grew older they could wiggle their arms out but for mine this wasnt until 4-5 months and they still started their naps swaddled. At some point they moved into grobags, think it was 6 months, but the routine didnt change. Even now they all hop into bed with a kiss and its lights out. They are 10/9/7/6/3.

poocatcherchampion · 27/08/2013 23:32

we do. only because she has always been fine with it. we don't leave her to cry on the rare occasions she has, but we just don't mess around - in bed, night night and off we go.

valiumredhead · 28/08/2013 00:19

Yes,I used to, he was good at settling down.woke in the night until he was 3 though

DioneTheDiabolist · 28/08/2013 00:25

Hahaha. I did this with my DS for 4 or 5 weeks when he was about 6months old. 'twas brilliant but it didn't last.

He was 3-4yo before my leaving him in bed, to sleep, was a done deal. Don't sweat it OP.

mumblechum1 · 28/08/2013 00:28

I always did it when mine were little and rarely had a problem. I've never got all this hanging around stroking them to sleep stuff.

MrsMinkBernardLundy · 28/08/2013 00:32

I did it with my twins too. i think teaching dcs to put themselves to sleep is for their own good in later life. Wish they still did it

chattychattyboomba · 28/08/2013 01:16

Yes. Well- we used to! Until we took the sides off her cot... She's still pretty good (only tries to get out of bed 3 times) Now she has to have (comforters) her entourage: gogo, florence, bunny, blankie, nigh nigh, night light, milk and books read... and sometimes peppa or night garden to complete the ritual! when she says 'but mummy... I want tuddles!' .....
OUCH! How can you say no to that? Well it was good while it lasted (2 years) but they are only little once as I am realising... The earlier days it was vital to my sanity to get that 'me' time after 7pm. Now it's easier day to day I don't mind her creeping into our bed at 5am and poking me with her chubby fingers... Slobbing me with a morning kiss and telling me 'want breakie mummy! Want toast!' Batting those long eyelashes with her duck down fuzzy morning hair... How could I say no to that? (Sorry... Bit carried away!)

kickassangel · 28/08/2013 01:20

Yep, until she was nearly three when the night terrors started ...

We did story time etc first, but once she was sleepy, just laid her down and that was it. If it makes you feel better, I had a horrible pregnancy and figure I earns the break.

StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 01:24

with ds1 I did it from day 1, also swaddled into his crib at 7pm after a feed. he just went to sleep and was consistently a brilliant sleeper 7-7 from about 12 weeks. he was put down awake and fell asleep on his own.

with ds2 I somehow forgot all this and seemed to be holding him all night long until he was about 16 months. I actually started co-sleeping as it was the only way I was getting any sleep.

big difference was that ds1 was formula fed from 7 weeks and ds2 was breastfed til 20 months.

if I was to have another I would do the swaddling, in crib awake at 7pm thing for sure and would try the BFing but wouldn't kick myself if I had to switch to FF to get some decent sleep.

StephenFrySaidSo · 28/08/2013 01:28

"Eventually as they grew older they could wiggle their arms out "

I have some brilliant photos of ds1 sleeping with one arm out of his swaddle shooting straight up past his head like a superman pose.

Cnix · 28/08/2013 07:10

I think some babies will just go to sleep themselves in their Moses basket and some just cry. Unfortunately dd was the latter. She does self settle now but always cries for a minute before she goes to sleep. With hindsight I wonder if I'd been a bit more in tune with her crying when she was little was she just crying from tiredness a d if I'd left her she'd have gone over. But with her being my first I never wanted to let her cry for a second. Think I'll be a little tougher if there's a DC2.

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