MN's 10th Birthday Party competition - write a Haiku about MN and win a golden ticket. To be judged by the Poet Laureate. (Not kidding!)

[JustineMumsnet]

So... it's our tenth birthday and we're having a party to celebrate on March 2nd. And seeing as we can't possibly fit you all in, we thought it would be nice to have a competition to have 10 Mumsnetters (plus partners) come along. As part of the prize we'll put you up in a London hotel, dress you in Boden (natch) and send you out to dinner at Pizza Express too. Full details here.

All you've got to do is to write a haiku (and we know how good you are at those) which sums up Mumsnet. And the 10 best will win. Simples.

And lest you think we might not pick the right winners, we've got Carol-Ann Duffy, Poet Laureate, to judge them for us. So for all those of you who enjoy writing in verse, here's your chance to shine.

Good luck.

WTF is a haiku??

Damn you, Justine, I should be writing about Zola and his striking coal miners, not composing Haiku. I hope Carol Ann Duffy has set a couple of days aside for this. And have plenty of cold flannels on hand to cool her fevered brow.

Thought made electric
You buzz along the wires
Of our secret lives

Spring cleaning awaits
I need advice from Mumsnet
Where did the day go

Inspiration strikes
A moment too late for me
As it often does

Bugger, should have put this and it would all have been haiku.

Living overseas
Excludes me from this fun bash
Wish I could enter!

Running with babies
One day I found you all
Behind my screen.

Lonely mothers
Start to type and talk
Like happy ones.

My children sleep.
We all have little vices -
I snort Mumsnet.

I?ve gone cold turkey
Several times in ten years
It never lasts.

My children sleep.
I take a brief holiday
From real life.

Oil cleansing
Penguin bumsex
Flouncers, pedants
It's community!

Unreasonable Mad Old Bats
gather
day and night.
How they ROFL

(Pron: "roffle" - see what I did there? . Hmm - does it work if you have to explain the poem?)

Carol Ann Duffy
Writes Splendid Poems
Is she a Mumsnetter too?

Starts with one question
Becomes a grave addiction
Can end in flouncing

Thinking in haiku
Now seems quite normal to me.
Must go to bed now!

Pity tired Mouldies,
sucky lemon mouths all round,
No Laureates there!

Icy nights lead to
Warming, deep conversations -
Old ways, new customs.

Blushes. Hits refresh.
True, WotcherHoochieMomma,
For I am still here

I think we should all put an outfit together in case we win. Maybe Carol Ann could judge them.
I am going for:
this with this and this.

Mermaids, not maiden,
Swim in salty Net, to spawn --
Golden fishwife prose.

Parenting knowledge
Shared from all corners
Comes together

Oh, troll hunts we love.
Weeding them out as we go.
Lavenderrr was best.

Ponders new poems.
The World's Wife: already done.
The Mumsnet Husbands?

Blown roses now, staked
with love and duty, here seek
what we were and are.

Men welcome here too
Of course. Just don't talk at us.
(And no boob jokes please.)

if you have to ask
Of COURSE you're unreasonable
Or are you a troll?

Mumsnet has helped me
Breastfeed my baby at last
And buy a hoover