MN's 10th Birthday Party competition - write a Haiku about MN and win a golden ticket. To be judged by the Poet Laureate. (Not kidding!)

[JustineMumsnet]

So... it's our tenth birthday and we're having a party to celebrate on March 2nd. And seeing as we can't possibly fit you all in, we thought it would be nice to have a competition to have 10 Mumsnetters (plus partners) come along. As part of the prize we'll put you up in a London hotel, dress you in Boden (natch) and send you out to dinner at Pizza Express too. Full details here.

All you've got to do is to write a haiku (and we know how good you are at those) which sums up Mumsnet. And the 10 best will win. Simples.

And lest you think we might not pick the right winners, we've got Carol-Ann Duffy, Poet Laureate, to judge them for us. So for all those of you who enjoy writing in verse, here's your chance to shine.

Good luck.

Mumsnetters light up
pathways parents trip along
honeycombed beacons

Never even heard of a haiku but here's my attempts!

For me:

Mumsnet friends, my life...
...line virtual for six long years
Advice, support, laughs

OR
For us:

Mumsnet friends. Our life...
....line virtual for ten long years
Advice, support, laughs

And a little extra one with a seasonal reference!!

In wintertime Mums
turn to virtual warmth and help
from friendly Mumsnet

Millions of viewpoints
raining my parade, bursting
my lonely bubble

I have learned much here
Don't google dragon butter
Or date a penguin

cows bark, no, lambs moo
toys strewn & thoughts askew
oooo mumsnet stew

Blinking, mewling, scared
Mother born into new world
Thanks god for mumsnet.

From TTC till UNI
Chat on Tots Bots Cots and NOT's!!
Mumsnet FYI

I'd rather be on Mums-
net than watching kids football, yes I would, if
I could, I surely would

From Pregnancy I
Need help and Style and Beauty
A new path to walk

The garden fence now
Consists of keyboards and screens.
We are web neighbours .

Hello. Just a little announcement to say that, after a leetle protest from non-UK-resident MNers, we have decided that this competition should be thrown open to all MNers, regardless of where you live.

BUT, obviously, if you win, you will have to get yourself from Timbuktu (or wherever) to London in time for the party. (They may be Golden Tickets but they don't include airfares!)

Because of this last-minute change, we're extending the closing date till midnight on Wednesday Feb 17th.

So, hurry, hurry: you have two more days to get those haikus in - wherever in the world you are.

The child watches CBBC.
Mum is on Mumsnet and types
on sex and food and work

sixteen pages now,
i can't be arsed to enter;
bumper's village wins

Jimjams must away
To the farking Mumsnet ball
To the vax threads she is all

give her a ticket give her a ticket give her a ticket

Gwan you must do it
Disent tous "Il faut le faire"
C'est plein necessaire.

That was two by the way. I know what's what

Mumsnet speaks, leaders
Tremble. Their untruths crumble
Like biscuits in tea.

hurrah, thank you MNHQ!!

(I posted anyway, as I cant resist any writing challenge, but now they are proper entries)

I'm new here, you know
But I thought I'd have a go
Hi, Mumsnet and co

Mumsnet is so nice
For fun chat and top advice
You shouldn't think twice

Stay here and make friends
On whom you truly depend
From start til the end

Mm, Pizza Express
And a nice Boden new dress
I must try my best

I'm cute and fluffy
I love Carol Ann Duffy
Win: Cheer Lose:Huffy

Aw thrifty, glad I've got your vote at least

In internet times
Mumsnetters are the neighbours
I no longer know.

A life abroad cold
and lonely until mumsnet -
new friends imaginary

bumper, you know it
you may as well start picking
out your boden dress

These haiku are an
Intellectual exercise
Strangely pervasive

DH now wonders
Why my speech is so rhythmic
I dare not tell him

Apologies for
The multitude of haiku
They come with each breath!

Politics, gossip....
The UK is far away.
Mumsnet updates me!

Friends say they will write
A new day, still no letters.
Mumsnet keeps in touch

For everyone else
I put on a brave facade.
On Mumsnet I?m me

Grammar: important
Thick skin: indispensible
Real life: put on hold

Every post deepens
Our tentative new friendship
But we?ll never meet.

Your posts set me straight.
Threads of life interweaving
On the world wide web

Ok, here are my entries. And yes, I realise they don't all follow 5 - 7- 5, but according to Wiki definition of haiku, modern english haiku doesn't have to follow this.

Mumsnet evokes:
Strangers with kindness
Nurture, support, campaign

Conflict, controversy?
Oh contrary:
Discussion, debate, friendship

Mums Dads and others:
Encouragement, support
Night no obstacle

When I have questions -
The all knowing Mumsnet mind
Now comes to my aid

Where can we all find
Advice support trivia?
We know the answer

Community here:
Assistance to those in need
We help those like us

Pieces of patchwork
We stitch ourselves together
Bound by common threads.