Please share your funniest family holiday moments!!

[GeraldineMumsnet]

What with far, far too much weather, January going on and on etc, we thought it would be cheering to ask for your funniest family hol highlights.

Whether home or abroad, sun or snow, we want your most guffaw-making memories.

Thanks everybody!!

A few years ago we drove to France with fingers crossed for a stress- and vomit-free journey. The ferry crossing was mercifully calm. Audio books distracted the DC on the long drive. After several long hours on the road, we pulled into the campsite reception. As DH switched off the engine and we congratulated each other on surviving the journey, an almighty retching sound came from the back seat as DS2's motion sickness finally bore fruit.

Seeing my ds's face as he came out from an Ayurvedic massage he had insisted on having when we were in India. He was 10. None of knew you had them naked.

Second funniest was seeing my dd's face (9)when she came out of hers. We had picked a head massage figuring she'd be safe after ds's. Naked again.

Girly weekend in Paris, sat at long communal benches in a lovely cafe for breakfast. Friend reaches over for some nutella for her croissant. Yum yum chat chat. 5 minutes later we realised it was not communal nutella, but she had just casually helped herself to someone else's breakfast order...

Holidaying on the Scillies with our 2 yr old DD we were very much aware of the lack of other children round and trying to not let DD create a nuisance to the other guests, especially during dinner in the (posh) hotel.

We thought we'd cracked it one night when we took our delicious puddings back to our room to have on the balcony whilst DD could run riot in our room, not the dining room. We left the balcony for one instant to look inside the room, only to turn back to find seagulls had flown off with our puddings. We were gutted!

Our first family holiday when DD1 was around 2 was spent in a holiday camp in Great Yarmouth.

As well as the three of us we also had the ridiculous idea that it would be nice if my mum and 14 year old stroppy sister came along with us in a more the merrier type of thing.

My mother, in her wisdom, decided it would be a great idea to have our names printed on t-shirts (in case we got lost?)

The family photo's of us all in a row with said t-shirts on with our names in huge letters can still 30 odd years later make me cringe with embarrassment.

Total strangers would call our names, even if we weren't wearing the damn things, every day of that god awful holiday.

Waving to our friends as we reversed out of the driveway of their Suffolk cottage only to realise we had left child no. 3 strapped into his car seat on the dining room table.

Weekend away at the coast - sunny day with with a sea breeze and zero suntan lotion, I suffered a very sore chest. The British weather turned foul the following day but I was so sore I couldn't stand to wear a bra underneath my t-shirt, tight fitting fleece and then coat and scarf (!). Went for lunch at the Magpie in Whitby. I was really glowing by this point, so removed my fleece over my head without holding onto my t-shirt. Every layer came away at once, thereby flashing my knockers to the entire top floor of the restaurant. Fewer people would have noticed if DP hadn't shrieked "What are you doing!!!!" at the top of his voice, thereby drawing everyone's attention to my exposed norks.
Sadly this didn't even qualify us for free chips!

We once went to scarborough for a long weekend .....it was truly the longest weekend of my life .....as dh unloaded the car hailstones the size of golf balls were hitting us on the head .....the caravan stank to high heaven - the roof it would appear had leaked.....ds1 went to the loo to do a number 2 and then we discovered it wasnt rainwater the toilet pipe was unfastened .........what Id been soaking up with beach towels wasn't water .....still it was our holiday and they came and water sucked the floors whilst we were out .......whilst were out in torrential rain ....the swimming pool was only open for short periods and everyone wanted to go in so you had no place to swim just to wiggle a bit the water chute was closed due to the lifeguard being unable to use it (he was 25 stone ) we came home a day early when ds2 burnt his hand on the heater panel and as we tried to hold it under the cold tap the tap came off in our hands .......

Park resorts apologised and offered us a discount off our next holiday and a£5 food and drink voucher

Excitedly going to collect our photos after an amazing holiday in the Highlands and finding that the first 4 of them were close-ups of sheep droppings, apparently a new interest for ds1

Belly laughs at JetLi

We went to Greece and I, pregnant with DD2, fell asleep and left DH in charge of DD1.

She spent the next hour filling the bases of the parasol stands (large immovable blocks of pebbly concrete) with tiny rocks, and as I stirred, I opened my eyes to see her stride naked to the surf, and in front of a startled Finnish family do a grand arching pee into the waves.

I've rarely felt such pride.

The parasol guy wasn't best chuffed.

We went to primrose valley in scarborough to the water parky bit and it was heaving - only room to wiggle there too - we were all dry and walked to toddler splash area where in middle was this big tower ds age 2 pointed at so dh carried him to it with dd and i close behind - lots of people sat round side watching inwards - seems this massive vat on top of tower filled with water then when full tips out over the idiots under the tower - it was really quite a force and almost knocked us over - me and dh were hysterical laughing as it was so unbelievable and put tin hat on a completely shoyte holidsy and the kids were hysterical in shock crying. We didnt stick around.

My favourite was going on our honeymoon - DH had taken his family off to the airport and come back, we were just checking the car over before leaving when I noticed an oil leak coming from just in front of the rear offside wheel. COuldn't work out where it was coming from but clearly not a good idea to take it to Bruges in that condition!
It was early Sunday morning so waited a bit until my friend (mechanic) was likely to be awake then went round to his with car. He tasted the stuff leaking (which was clean, btw) and said it was definitely brake fluid. boo etc.

SOooo - I noticed DH had left the parcel shelf on the back seat, went to replace it - opened the boot and spotted my 5L bottle of Castrol lying on its side with the lid off....

I've never felt quite such a rush of rage and relief at the same time (Although no doubt I will in future with DS ) but at least it was problem solved and we could go on honeymoon after all. We still laugh at my friend - brake fluid indeed!

On the scarborough holiday dh got chucked out of the swimming pool sitting area - for taking fotos of a woman in the pool - it was me and i pretended i didnt know him .

we went to the same caravan park every year.
On the first day of one holiday i had been up playing with friends and returned "home" to get my dinner.
i walked into the caravan, sat at the table and asked mum what was for dinner.

a strange woman looked at me like i was mad and said " i dont think this is your caravan darling"

i was 14

On holiday in the Canaries when dd1 was not much past 1 she and her cousins (not a lot older) spotted a tiny spider on the floor. They all crouched down around it to have a good look and watched it for a while, quite fascinated. Then dd stood up and promptly stepped on said spider and toddled off leaving everyone else staring at just the floor - the spider was now squashed on the bottom of her little cotton peep-toe sandals!

As a child on our family camping holiday, pulling up at the camp site and being greeted by the owner, only for the dog to jump out of the window and chase the owners cat. He wasn't happy - the owner that is, though I suppose the cat wasn't either. Dog was, he loved a good chase.

Mum pouring cornflakes into the teapot sticks in the memory too, she's never lived it down.

DH having his pasty pinched by a seagull in St.Ives had me doubled up with laughter, it was so quick DH was stunned.

I remember being on the beach with my parents when we were younger. Dad was trying with all his might to get a kite flying for us. He was running as fast as he could holding onto the string, managed to get it in the air, cue lots of cheering from us.....as he disappeared into a DEEP hole somebody had dug earlier in the day!!

Just remembered that we used to take our cat, yes our bloody cat, on holiday with us. And not in a cat box, oh no. She used to roam around the car pissing and shitting while we whizzed up the M6 to Scotland.

It's not like she was a lovely obedient, friendly cat either. She was a grumpy mare that used to disappear and then we'd spend the last day walking around shaking a box of cat biscuits shouting, "Soooooooookie!! Sooooooooooookie!!"

WTF???

Driving for miles and miles in Scotland to find a destination DH remembered as a 'lovely spot' from his childhood.

Eventually after much 'are we nearly there yet' whining from the children, we arrived.

Unfortunately DH's memory had not served him well; we found ourselves on the shoreline of a lake. It was covered, in fact encrusted with what can only be described as the debris of human waste.

The whole event has been immortalised in family history as 'the day we went to Loch Toilet Paper.'

This thread is so sweet. Very noticeable that everybody has the worst time when they try really, really hard to have a good time

Mylifemykids I have spat tea all over my keyboard, thanks!

It reminded me of a boat trip my family took years ago in the States - we had to moor the boat pointy end in to the shore, and once we'd grounded the boat 2 foot from the shore my dad jumped overboard clutching an enormous anchor, complete with pipe in his mouth. And yes, he did jump into a hidden underwater hole, not the 6 inches of water he'd anticipated.

He went entirely underwater yet bounced back up complete with smouldering pipe in his mouth.

This didn't happen to me, but a friend of mine:

She (lets call her J) and her dh were fairly new to camping. They drove from SW London to Durdle Door in Dorset (3 and a half+ hours drive) to meet other mutual friends, a couple with two very young children.

They find their pitch on the campsite, all very excited, mutual friends are already there busily pitching their cosy family tent.

So, J's dh opens the boot of their car and ...

he's forgotten to pack their tent!!!!!!!!!!

And the consequence was that they all cosied up together in the mutual friends' tent (4 adults and two toddlers) for the night .

We took a tortoise camping in the Lake District once.

When I was about 11 we visited some caves in Yugoslavia (as it was then!) with a little train that whizzed at a fair speed through some rather low stone archways at times. As we approached each one my Dad shouted "Geese!" from the back of the train (rather than Duck!). By the time we got to the end of the train-ride every other tourist, none of them English, was also shouting "Geese!" at every approach to a low archway. We were so glad that nobody asked us what Geese meant...