Please share your funniest family holiday moments!!

[GeraldineMumsnet]

What with far, far too much weather, January going on and on etc, we thought it would be cheering to ask for your funniest family hol highlights.

Whether home or abroad, sun or snow, we want your most guffaw-making memories.

Thanks everybody!!

[ThatVikRinA22]

we hired a cottage in the cotswolds. DS has aspergers, takes things very literally. while relaxing in the garden one afternoon a wasp landed in DS drink, he panicked, so i said

"chuck it on the floor"

so he lobbed the entire glass. it missed the conservatory by about an inch.

he also managed to walk into the patio doors on that holiday too.

[Hassled]

My funniest moment was when my very cool and together older brother fell out of a raft at Aqualand last Summer. I laughed like a drain, even when he said it really really hurt. I laughed some more when this big lump appeared on his shoulder - it was that sort of uncontrollable, hysterical, inappropriate laughter you just can't control.

Anyway - he's back being cool in New York and is still having physio. It still hurts. He may need surgery. He sends me regular and detailed updates because he hasn't forgiven me for the inappropriate laughter.

[theagedparent]

We were on the beach in Turkey when dd aged 1 needed her nappy changing. My dh did this and placed the stinking nappy on the floor while he finished dressing dd. Within seconds a pack of stray dogs appeared and snatched the nappy, ripping it apart and shaking it around all over the other holiday makers. People were trying to escape, lots were gagging and one poor woman was actually sick. Was awful at the time but can't help but snigger about all those terrified faces and at least the dogs got a tasty meal.

[LynetteScavo]

We'd just arrived in Cornwall, and decided to go to the beach at Padstow to kick a ball around before going for fish and chips. DS1 and DS2 were 3 and 7 and were running quickly to the waters edge. DH and I called tpo them to take off thier socks and shoes if they were going in, which they obediantly did. We had thought they would paddle in the cool water. Not my boys, they were up to their necks and sqeeling with delight in seconds. Nutters.

On a slightly groser note, I had bad morning sickness when pg with DS1. DH and I took a boat from Lanzerote to another island (I can't remember which). DH kindly bought me a drink in a pint glass, and we were both suprised that I wasn't feeling sea sick, as the boat was rolling around considerably. Then suddenly I threw up, re-filling the pint glass with sick. My morning sickness had managed to mask the sea sickness.

A boy of a bout 10 was sitting next to me, and was most facinated.

[CrossAunt]

going on a very serious coach tour around robben island, hearing about the terrible conditions nelson mandela and his fellow prisoners were kept it - suddenly my brother takes a sip of his can of drink and spits out the mouthful so hard it sprays over half the coach.

heads turn

a wasp had fallen in the can

[Boco]

A family holiday to Sheringham when I was about 9. We always went out of season so it was gale force winds and rain. My dad got drenched by a large wave crashing over the sea wall - when we got back to holiday cottage he found he had no other trousers and it was freezing so had to put on my mum's tight pink cords. He's 6'4, my mum is 5'5 so they were skin tight and half way to his ankles. As we had no food and my brother had an ear infection so we couldn't eat out, he nipped out under cover of darkness to get fish adn chips but was followed all teh way there and back by a policeman obviously suspicious of the peculiar transvestite type.

[HallelujahHeisBorntoMary]

We, as a family, were on a flight to Prague, as were several stag/hen parties - although they were well behaved on the flight, so no issues there.

I took DD to the toilet, and we were in there a little while, when there was a knock on the door - it was the stewardess "Is everything alright in there?". I replied, "yes we're fine, its just there's not a lot of room in here for two".

When we came out, the stewardess couldn't apologise enough. Some man with a GSOH on the front row had told her he'd seen 2 people go into the toilet, and they'd been in there a while and hadn't come out. She'd assumed it was a couple joining the mile high club, and hence she'd knocked on the door. God knows what she made of my reply! She was STILL apologising when we got off the aircraft!

[jeee]

As a child we went on a canal boat holiday. All was going swimmingly, until such time as the boat sunk.

[GrimmaTheNome]

As a child we went on a canal boat holiday. All was going swimmingly, until such time as the boat sunk.

and then it went really swimmingly?

[prettybird]

Isn't it funny how most of these "funny" stories would not have been funny for those involved at the time!

.... the benefits of hindsight!

[PrettyCandles]

Ds and I went camping with a friend and her ds, who were camping virgins. "Don't worry" said I, "I'll bring everything - we've got all the kit."

We got to the campsite and unloaded. Then I left them there while I drove all the way back home to fetch...

...the tent.

[driedapricots]

Geraldine forgive me using this thread to contact you. I'm a recentish convert to MN - newly pregnant for 2nd time and enjoying the support from the Aug antenatal thread. I work in PR and this holiday memories thread is hugely relevant for a campaign i'm starting to work on now. I wondered if you would be interested in talking to me about potentially doing a little bit of joint activity. I appreciate MN is more than brilliant at its own self promotion, if you are interested in hearing my proposition though pls can you let me know and we can find a way to talk offline...?
Loving all these holiday memories btw
thanks!

[TheWorldFamousKewcumber]

This isn't technically a holiday story but in 2006 a few friends and I were stuck in Almaty (Kazakhstan) with our babies for Christmas whist waiting for paperwork to be sorted. We'd been there 2 months by this point and were pretty desparate for any hint of home at Xmas...

One of the people with us has a sister (H) whose friend (X) had announced to H that she was flying to Almaty for Christmas with her family and would bring some stuff out for us.

This was a big topic of conversation for us for several days...

"Why would anyone come to Almaty for Christmas?"

"They don't celebrate Christmas here!"

"I didn't know anyone else knew where Almaty was?!"

It was explained that they go somewhere different for Christmas every year - perhaps a bit like the Wombles picking their names, they just stuck a pin in a map. After the initial disbelief wore off, we began to see distinct possibilities, as thoughts of Red Cross parcels crossed our minds and we started petitioning H to send various things out with X. H's family duly shopped themselves to a standstill and with a thought to said friend's baggage allowance put together a parcel for her to bring out with her. They packed and repacked it to make it all possible.

H received a phone call after all this activity and X's small voice whispered -

"I've checked the tickets and we're going to Alicante not Almaty".

[TheWorldFamousKewcumber]

and there is a postscript - two days afetr Xmas an unexpected parcel was received from a lovely bunch of mumsnetters with Xmas cards, crackers, tinsel, minepies, DVD's and various presents and food stuffs.

Lovely people they were/are.

[bran]

We used to drive to Kerry from Dublin for our holidays. One very wet journey we came to a dip in a country road that was a huge puddle, probably a good 4 metres from one edge to the other. Mum stopped the car and suggested that Dad put his wellies on and check the depth. Dad didn't want to get out of the car in the rain and was sure it couldn't be that deep, he told Mum to drive through slowly.

The car filled with water to just below seat level. As Mum drove uphill out of the puddle all the water moved to the back of the car and soaked the back seat. Dad told Mum it was her fault and if she had gone through quickly the water wouldn't have had time to seep in.

Not long after that I was car sick, twice.

[Hullygully]

I agree with Bran

[solo]

When I was about 12, my Dad borrowed a caravan and took Mum, me and my brother to the New Forrest. Unfortunately, Dads car kept overheating and we eventually stopped for good in a kind of layby that bordered on a wooded area. My brother and I needed a poo desperately and Mum told us to go and 'dig a hole' in the wood and go there(no facilities in the caravan)so we did...unfortunately, we chose an old fox hole and came back stinking of fox. Mum was green at the gills!

[ppeatfruit]

on holiday in cannes (we had rented a flat). there was a knock on the door and our ds of 12 stood in the doorway accompanied by 2 burly french policeman. he had been seen graffiting and the police had been sent for.
thank the lord my husband can speak good french and they all went to the police station where the little 'rosbif' had been let off as long as the offending marks were removed. Ds and i scrubbed hard on the wall which was in full view of a clinic.
to finish it all on our way home through security at the airport 4 bottles of spray paint were removed from ds's hand luggage!!he never indulged in graffitti again!!blush

[Saker]

In France we were playing with the children by a stream with a bank on one side and trees all around. Dh was down in the water with the kids and I was on the bank about to go back to the car for something. Dh tossed me the car keys which miraculously looped themselves over a high branch of the tree.... and we spent the next half an hour aiming sticks and stones at them to knock them back down.

[Saker]

Another one, when I was a child in Rouen with my parents and brother. My mum suddenly disappeared and we were looking all around for her. The next thing we saw her reversing someone's car into a parking space. Apparently a total stranger had asked her to park her car since it was new and she was worried about reversing it .

[liahgenisuptheduff]

Went to France last year, dd3, ds1 and myself flew, dh drove with MIL, dd1, 2 and ds2

Lovely holiday etc etc, except Dh got pulled over on Way in and had to explain his relationship with dd1, (he's her stapfather),

No worries, on way home, it was very nicely pointed out to Dh that ds's passport was in fact 3 moths out of date!!

Could have been Very Unfunny, just as well spotted on way home.

[lal123]

We were in Rhodes a few years ago and went to an open air concert one night in an old amphitheatre place. We were stepping down the steps leaving and I stepped off the last step - thinking it was about the same height as the rest (it was very dark), but it wasn't - it was about 3 ft high. DP says I was like Mrs Doyle in Father Ted - of course I jumped up pretending to be fine "nothing to see here" - and habbled home...

When we were in Poland we were walking out of train station with rahter heavy backpacks - I toppled backwards and couldn't get up - bit like a turtle. DP just walked on until he realised I wasn't beside him and then killed himself laughing at me...

[Beauregard]

Family holiday in Devon a few years ago with my parents.We had lovely weather and despite my mom nagging dad to apply his sun cream noone could figure out why my dad was getting redder and redder in the face.Until i looked at the 'sun cream' my mom had been giving him.
Turns out it was after sun and boy was he burned peed myself laughing all the way to the chemist.
Also same holiday and on the last day we went to the nearest pebbly beach and took some fold up chairs.Dad sat down on his and went straight back onto the pebbles like a dying fly.
Gotta love my dad bless him.

[GrimmaTheNome]

That reminds me of when we went to the Carribean and burned ourselves (insufficient suncream, underestimated the power of the sun at that latitude). Fortunately I'd noticed earlier that the hotel supplied after-sun. Unfortunately, as DH discovered when I was attempting to soothe his skin, in the same packaging as their hair conditioner. Which was the reverse of soothing.