what's this PO stuff all about? I have just read some really vile stuff on here....

[Portofino]

Women presumably who don't have a certain sense of humour, or don't agree with certain (long standing) posters being described as beige admin workers who nag their ugly husbands, who were friendless at school, wear cheap clothes, have no fun in their sad little joyless lives etc etc Literally paragraphs and paragraphs of nastiness.

This is some of the most vile and misogynistic stuff I have ever read on MN from other women. These kind of comments normally come from trolls and MRA invasions. Is this really what MN has become? Does everyone think that this sort of shit should stand? What happened to the fucking sisterhood?

I am astounded to be quite honest.

I don't think the fact that some posters get called bullies etc means they actually are.
I don't get followed around or accused of bullying. I don't seem to get pounced on even though I know I am loathed by a chunk of people. I just think I am a harder target to hit. I am less out there than others
So I am not sure it is as simple as 'no smoke without fire' iyswim.
I think some personalities just create a stronger reaction than others and many of those stick to certain topics.
If posters who create a strong reaction are also prolific and often part of noisy chatty threads it is a recipe for disaster really. I can see how it might seem excluding even if it isn't.

It's just a bit sad to me, if that's not too lame. I just log on for a chat and a joke, to ask for or share advice. Yet the process seems to get more complicated all the time.
I genuinely wouldn't spend time with anyone who logs on to be a shit yet the accusations keep flying around. I get tired of being forced into artificial groupings of who I am supposed to like/side with and who I am trying to exclude/be mean to.

Surely "po" is just a name for "anyone who is not one of us and is not clamouring to join"

< hands TSC the bottle >

I will delurk just to grab one of those

As to the rest of it I keep typing posts then changing my mind so I think I'll follow my own instincts and just

I have chocolate eating to do anyway.

One of who?

at whole thread really. To liken it to school days (which MN of reminds me of) feels like a group of friends have fallen out and and you're left sort of bewildered about which end of the common room to sit in.

I thought LaQ's description was quite saddening. Not the lifestyle, the attitude. I can see where it came from. I can also see why it could be upsetting and offensive.

I can also see that no-one will give a stuff what I think.

I will pass on the wine,I have the hangover from hell.Any lucazade on offer?

I think we should all get slowly drunk, all being a bit pissed is a great leveller.

drink up!

Cestlesautres

That doesn't bear any relation to what I have understood by it. And it certainly wasn't what it meant when i was being called it.
But it seems now to be whatever anyone wants it to mean tbh. Depending on your particular angle.

Obviously there is a fine line between what is funny for one and offensive to another. Heck my FB wall pays testament to that. And I have been frustrated in the past by thread derailing, where sensible debate gets over run by talk of cake or something. I find it irritating. That's me though. I don't like sneering though, posters who think they are more important than everyone else and counter every argument with sentiments like this PO thing. I think many women have a hard enough time in RL making themselves heard and having their wants and needs seen as equal to those of say, their partners and children, without MNetters demeaning their equally valid opinion as PO or joyless or somesuch. You only need aVB thread to see the lack of solidarity. Everyone seems to HATE her though I can't what she can possibly have done.

for you usualsuspect.

I am starting at lunchtime and sweeping straight through supper at the moment so I m probably way head of everyone

Pag I have truly never seen you post anything that has made me 'prickle' in a bad way, - and I'm not fawning - just stating what I see.

I think sometimes posters get lumped together, tarred with the same brush if you will, - just because they happen to have appeared on a number of threads together.

Anyway I hope this blows over soon as I'm not quite feeling the same about posting here as I used to.

And Belle, - I agree with what you said about the common room thing - that is a bit how it seems (see, someone does give a stuff)

@LoopaDaLoopa

Rowan, could you please clarify my point above? I made absolutely certain there was nothing that could be construed as a personal attack in my post. It seems that either I am unable to ascertain your definition of a personal attack, or that MNHQ want to erase any posts where people point out that bullying does exist on this site.

Hi there

It was reported because you said 'the c&p quote showed a horrible side to that particular poster', which we did construe as a personal attack.

I will have wine please!

Coming up portofino. < dashes out to get more wine >

Good points IMO, Portofino.

Ta Fenton. I agree with Belle too.
The weird thing is seeing posters I like enormously on both threads being portrayed as one side or the other.

The key to the "sides" nonsense is to talk about the issues not the personalities.

Oh right, I

see, I'm going to take particular care to

only post a little bit at a time just in

case I lose a long and

carefully constructed post to the