I used to be 'Memoo' but a few months ago I flounced
because, frankly, I am a big mard arse.
When I rejoined just a few minutes later I wasn't able to have the name 'Memoo' 
and I miss it, being 'iMemoo' just isn't the same. I feel empty and hollow. Like my whole identity has been striped from me and now I just wander aimlessly around the boards, lonely as a cloud.
So please my most loveliest, kindest, forgiving and compassionate Mumsnet people can I have my name back?
I promised to grow up and never flounce again. And if I do I will don a really awful name as punishment. Something like MrsSmellyFartyKnickersWithTheFaceLikeTheBackEndOfTheNumber7Bus
I have drunk wine so am not afraid to beg or tell you that I really really love you all so much and will love you a squillion times more if you let me have my name back.
I have layed myself bare now
I am here, on my knees
Begging you to please find it in your heart to grant me my one wish.
And I promise if you do I will be a good mumsnetter forever after.
And I'll send you cake