Is this the norm for most sexual relationships?

[Is10]

I’m in my 40s and since my first few sexual experiences there’s always been some touching of the ‘back’ area. A little internally for foreplay. I’ve had six partners and they’ve all been into this. However, my most recent partner says that’s incredibly unusual and that whilst he’s happy to do it for me if I want that, he wouldn’t have suggested it and nor has it ever been something that happened in his previous relationships. Is my experience unusual?!

I really thought I was very normal in this way and that actually in not going the full way with penetration there and instead just fingers, that I was quite vanilla!

Its more common than you think!
Every man bar one that I've been with has quite openly admitted they like anal play of some description! Wouldn't admit it to their mates obviously 🙄

Your experience is totally subjective. Personally I’ve not particularly seeked after that…. But if that’s what you and your partners like it doesn’t matter if it’s usual or unusual to anybody else?

I've had a couple of partners explore back there but most haven't so not the usual in my experience.

Why don't you post this on the Sex forum?

I've only had one ex have any interest in that, on me and himself. My now long term partner and every other bf since teenage years have never shown any interest... Definitely not a usual thing from my experience.

Fairly adventurous youth and no, it’s never happened to me. I wouldn’t be comfortable if it did, either, I’d probably get very concerned about handwashing in between! Just no.
i’m 48.

@Needacalminginfluence sorry didn’t think! Happy to have it transferred over but there’s usually more traffic here!

You mean the guy puts fingers in your anus?

I wouldn't have thought that was normal and would not like it at all!

I know some guys like a finger in their anus but that is different, they have a prostate that is sensitive.

You will get more expert and knowledgeable answers in the sex topic. That's what it's supposed to be there for: to answer questions like yours that are purely about sex.

Very normal for me - most men I’ve slept with at one point have expressed interest in “back there” and some have expressed me doing things there - no big deal, we like what we like

I think men get a nice sensation from that due to the prostate. I've not had many partners but in my very limited experience yes men do like this. It's kind of something you build up to though I think.

Report your own post and ask for it to be moved the the sex forum, OP.

I love a fingertip inside. My husband likes being stroked on the outside but doesn’t want to be penetrated at all.

Hi, OP.
We've moved your thread to the Sex topic now.

I had zero interest in my youthful days and zero interest in my married days. My DW is the same

One ex with whom I was exploring kink-very much so. Only one “vanilla” bloke expressed an interest. That works out at 17% if you are compiling statistics.

Certainly not unusual in my experience, and l’ve had a few more than 6 (just a few you understand 🤭) but l think it’s better that a partner does not take it as a given without discussing.

You say he’s happy to do that, so surely there’s not a problem.

Yes have an Asperger’s partner who gets turned on by farting not porn, alone.
(before people come after me, my partner does not like the use of autism or on spectrum, preferring this old term) unable to hold down a job to unable to maintain an erection.

I ended up having to ask myself if I was his carer. He’d refuse to shower, shampoo his hair unless told and have they taken their medication, all hallmarks of genuine pip claim.

Not a normal thing for men to do in my many years on this planet, I am convinced it’s a result of today’s males watching pornography to learn about sex, before internet & video recorders were the norm I had not realised there was such a thing for normal people, more for perverts to get off on.

@Is10 you're either into it or you're not, i'm not personally a fan but when i first met my partner she suggested it so i did it just because she asked so i assumed that's what she wanted, i only found out later on down the line that she only offered it because she thought that's what men wanted...the irony of it.

I absolutely love giving and recieving it. Amazing feeling..