Update please be kind

[TheOpalFox]

I had therapy this morning. I feel like I’m gonna put in so much hard work to try and deal with the ex leaving me
I’m also on a higher antdidepressent
it’s killing me he’s left but I’m trying to put in the hard work I really am.
i hate feeling this level of pain and hurt I really do :(
just to let you all know I’m trying xx

That’s good that you’re trying op. One step at a time. And stick with the therapy, it takes time.

That's wonderful news OP, onwards and upwards!❤️
This is a new start, make a list of things you'd like to do over the coming weeks and months so you have lots to look forward to.

You got this Opal. This time next year................
Xx

One thing to ask yourself. Does posting on here, checking for replies, reading them, responding help you.

I mean this kindly, but continually posting about it and how sad you are only reinforces that feeling of sadness

Well done you OP for putting in the work on your mental health.
The pain will ease over time .
Best wishes.

Was the relationship toxic/abusive OP? these are usually the hardest to get over, not because they are 'stronger' or 'the real thing' but because the 'push -pull' from the abuser/manipulator is very powerful and damaging.

Crikey I’m really impressed that you’ve done so much to help yourself. Give it time. Things will get better.

You see people do it all the time, and @TheOpalFox i feel for you when I see it because I know people are going to pile on you straight away, but I’ve also been in a place where something takes over your life so completely that there is no room for anything else.

I suspect you may have an issue similar to me, I have OCD and it often causes repeated behaviours, yours seems to be posting and seeking out feedback/validation. You need to try to find a workaround, another outlet for this, something that will give your mind something else to think about.

Just remember, as awful as it is now, you will come out of the other side of it stronger

Remember the best, hard work isn’t about him.
It is about you. When you work in therapy and understand that, you will make progress.
It won’t get you ‘over’ him.
It will help get you to a place where are stronger in yourself, like yourself and have healthier relationships.
I am no therapist but you hang a lot of your pain on the situation with this man. But what you really need to deal with is who you are.
Saying that as someone who has been there myself.
Most of all, WELL DONE on going to that first session. Lots of people cancel, so going and speaking and engaging is a big, first step for you.
Thanks for letting us know about your progress.

I dont know your story, but sending you a hug!

Well done, OP. Wishing you well. Xxx

Good luck OP well done on going to therapy. I know its been hard for you but you got this x

🥴

That's pretty unpleasant when OP has starred the thread to get some support for her mental health.
She is doing her best to help herself so why be so nasty?

This time next year you'll be ex who?! You got this opal.

Inappropriate considering this is a far better thread where op has actually seeked help.

I had years of therapy to give me the strength and insight to understand why I was attracted to men who rejected me and why I pined for them so much. It’s early stages but once you get better understanding of yourself you can deal with it so much better

If this is the poster I think it is, then this thread is actually the first positive step forward, so it seems a shame to have a go at her.

Well done. You're taking a positive step to help yourself.

Can I ask why you were?
I just don’t understand him leaving me has made me feel this low. I’m I’m sure it nearly gave me a break down!!!!

Well done @TheOpalFox, that sounds really positive.

I subconsciously modelled my relationships on my parents’ relationship, which was extremely unhealthy but was my comfort level, even though it was far from comfortable! My self worth was very low because I had a perfectionist father. I don’t blame them in the slightest but understanding helped me to explain to myself some of the seemingly odd choices I made.

@TheOpalFox Order yourself some adult colouring books and nice pens. It'll give you something positive to focus on and you'll have something beautiful when you finish.

That's a lovely suggestion. It can be a very relaxing, soothing way to pass the time OP.

Thankyou