My bf and I are in our late 20s and have been in a relationship for 2 years and living together for 1 year. Because marriage is important to me, we talked about early on. I said that I generally wouldn't want to date someone longer than 2.5 years without getting married or engaged at least. He then said that while he never considered marriage or saw much value in it, because it was important for me he would be open to it. He would say he doesn't understand why the government should know about our relationship. I interpreted those initial conversations as us being somewhat on the same page or at least being willing to compromise.
Fast forward to now, I have started to feel uneasy about the future of our relationship. We first started discussing us getting married 10-11 months ago and he would always dodge the conversation, saying "I already told you we'd get married". Last time when I specifically asked about when he'd want to get married he said that we already discussed it and couldn't afford it. It might be true but I said multiple times, I don't want an extravagant wedding and it could literally be a courthouse ceremony for immediate family. What hurt me the most is that the conversation basically died after it, there wasn't any follow up - no "we can't afford it now but let's have a plan for X time etc". There was nothing. Me constantly being the only one to start these conversations made me feel unchosen and undesired. I almost feel embarrassed cuz I never thought I would end up begging a man to choose me and marry me. Ultimately I want to be married to someone who actively chooses me.
I stated to consider leaving this relationship. 2.5 years is not an arbitrary number but I believe you'd know early on you want a future with someone. And what's hurting me he is not actively planning our life together or taking any action towards it. Another layer of complexity is me being an international in the US. I wanna make it straight - I have a good career and life outside of this relationship so I am not looking to be saved and neither do I think he owes me marriage for the immigration benefits. But my partner knows how much stress I've been under with the volatile environment and he knows he could secure our future if he wanted too. But I never pressured him into it.
What stops me is the fact that the relationship is not bad. We support each other, live together, and have good compatibility overall. Being in my late 20s, I am also scared of going back into the dating market and potentially risking not finding anyone at all. But I started to wonder if, by staying, I give up on one of my core values because I want to be married and have a family of my own one day. Maybe he is comfortable with where things are at the moment - like c'mon we live together, he's literally getting the wife benefits.
So the question I wanted to ask folks who might've been in the same situation, how did you know it's time to walk away or what made you stay? How did you know your partner was worth waiting for?
TLDR: My bf dodges every conversation about future and doesn't take any steps to plan a life together, I am considering walking away