Am I unreasonable to mind my husband putting dates with his mistress on the calendar

[Adviceseeker35]

I'm separated from my husband after he left me in February. I then found out in June that he'd been having an affair since April 2025. We still live together. He's now started putting their dates on the family calendar with their initials clear for our son to see. He's claiming that I asked him to tell me when He's seeing her, and can't see that he's doing anything wrong. He thinks I'm overreacting. I feel like his rubbing his relationship in my face. They only good thing that it reminds me that I'm well shot of him.

What an absolute pig. I'm sorry.

What a horror! I hope that one of you can move out soon. Maybe you should accidentally drop in on one of his date afternoons and say oh since it was on the calendar I thought I was invited too!

He is an arsehole.

Well he’s a monumental shithead isn’t he

You are not unreasonable but you are definitely well rid ! 🫂 x

New policy, you both just start putting “unavailable” on the shared calendar and keep a second calendar with the details elsewhere. You don’t need to share your private info with him either, even if it’s benign.

He is being a dick. Are there any plans for either of you to move out?

Why are you still living together? It must be so awkward. Tell him to go to live with his mistress.

What an awful awful garbage!!!

I've asked why he wont live with her all I get is they aren't like that. I suspect it's more that she lives hundreds of miles away.

When I confronted him about the calendar last night he went into martyr mode and said he'd sleep in the car.

Can you add some initials to the calendar too, when he asks what it is just say you thought that's what you did when you had dates with someone. Play him at his own game

Good! I hope the gear stick digs right into his left kidney.

Can’t you create a shared calendar that just blocks out time as ‘busy’? Neither of you need to know what busy means, it could be a hairdresser appt or a date or going to the gym - it’s none of the other person’s business. Then have your own separate private calendars with your actual schedule with info that each other can’t see?

Tell him I said he's a fucking twat.

What a cunt!!! I’d be changing the initials to “husband and his whore” each time 😂

He couldn't even see that it was wrong that our son can see his plans with her. And he wonders why he's distant with him.

Why is he living with you and why on earth have you got a shared calendar! You need to get rid of both

I would ignore. He's doing it to get a reaction.

That's nice dear

Totally out of order. Passive aggressive. Why put them in the family calendar? I sympathise with you x

Fucking let him! Hope it gets very cold very quickly!!

He's a total arsehole. I can't bear how these base men have no sense of decency the moment their sordid little affairs are out in the open. It is almost as if the affair isn't bad enough in itself they have to act like total fucking cunts once they've been found out just to ram the message home that they are lower than pond life.

Do you really need to ask?

They had no sense of decency before their affairs were discovered, that's why they were cheating.

OP, it's not OK, and I hope his son tells him that one day.

My ex husband did this on our shared calendar so I just deleted them as soon as they came in. One was for a wedding they were invited to and I took great delight in deleting that one. He soon took the hint and started using his own calendar.

Ideal. Shame it's a warm night.