To preempt: I have some mental issues which are ongoing and which will probably always be a challenge for me. I got a lot better in the last few years but I still tend to make poor decisions.
I posted a while back about my ex having reached out to me and asking to come over and stay with me because he wasn't well, and I was worried about boundaries despite considering him a friend since our breakup.
The thing is that his visit has really thrown my head back into chaos which I had not expected and which makes no sense.
He didn't seem well and said that he had recently lost both his job and his relationship due to consistent inappropriate behavior, and that it was his own fault and that he had started seeking help but felt ashamed and like he couldn't talk to anyone but maybe me.
He confessed that he had consistently cheated in every relationship, and also on me several times during our relationship which stung, even though we broke up years ago. I broke up with him for entirely different reasons and I'm not sure why this still hurt to hear.
At the same time I felt like this was the first time that I had seen the real him, so I think he really has reached rock bottom and finally cracked.
I even understand why he reached out. He was with me through some of my worst MH challenges and he knows that I have experience with different therapy forms which he is now looking at. The problem is that I now feel an incredible connection again because I obviously still care for him and because he was undoubtedly the most caring partner I ever had. But I also know that this would probably a complete disaster in the long run.
Right now I really feel like giving him another chance because I was so happy to see him open up and trust someone for the first time.
I will probably get some harsh replies but please don't call me an idiot.