How do I move on when he says I am difficult?

[Hippychickbbbb]

He said im imtolerable im difficult im a pain in the ass i keep dreaming about him i miss us being close he blames me for everything he dosent love me i cant let go of all the bad things that have happened im trapped in the past ive got a counclor ive got a social worker trying to help me

I didnt talk non stop for 12 hours

Im not hard work! My only thing is i talk alot theres nothing wrong with that hes intolerant of me ive always talked alot i repeate my self sometimes i dont want to move out but it looks like i have no choice

Your posts don’t make any sense?!

Well, you dont have a choice but to accept he doesnt want to be in a relationship with you any more. Who would even want to be with someone who doesnt want them?

The house is different. Do you own it / rent it together?

OP you need to hear what is being said to you. Your ex doesn’t want to be with you and you need to find somewhere else to live. It doesn’t matter if it’s you or him that has been the problem - you still need to move out.

Im not hard work! You are. You do not listen.

My only thing is i talk alot theres nothing wrong with that He has ended the relationship and it was a factor.

hes intolerant of me He's decided that the relationship is over.

ive always talked alot i repeate my self sometimes So you've said - more than once.

i dont want to move out but it looks like i have no choice Move out then.

Genuine question because to me it seems to be the core of your problem. Why won’t you accept that he doesn’t want to be with you anymore and that the relationship is over?

Until you can be honest with yourself about that everything else is irrelevant.

OP here might say she is well but sadly isn’t and my heart goes out to her.
She needs to move out and access supported living.
Resources are so stretched now that people go without the help they need.
It is easy for us to just judge from disjointed posts but at the other end is a lady who is in real distress which she clearly cannot move on from.
MN isn’t the place for her.

and I can’t just move out just cause I have feelings and express them

No, you should move out because you're in a toxic relationship.

And by the way, you are hard work.

I know that everyone on MN deserves a voice and a space, but PPs, OP is not listening and we do not have enough info to know why.

OP most probably has MH issues. OP is in an abusive relationship. OP will not / cannot leave this man.

Sporadic, rambling, self absorbed posts. No engagement with PPs responses. It is worrying.

I have nowhere to go I do accept the relationship is over I’m sorry your all frustrated at me I’m traumatised by him ending the marriage but I will end up not coping if I live alone I’ve only ever spent 4 days by myself he said he wouldn’t let me have my daughter I’m not mentally ill I’ve been discharged from mental health services

@Hippychickbbbb , I'd try the Mental health board because the posters there might be more knowledgeable about where you might get support.

If you AS this poster you will realise she has a lot of support from the MH crisis team and support workers in real life but doesn't seem to be taking that help. Unfortunately this OP is fixated on her ex who has divorced her and who needs to sell the marital home as he has lost his job. It's a very bad situation for all concerned tbh.

OP, I thought you had someone helping you to find somewhere else to live?

OP it doesn’t matter whether it’s you or him. It’s not working.

You can’t make someone stay married to you against their will.

You can’t insist that a person should like or love you. It doesn’t work like that.

Your feelings are not anyone else’s responsibility to fix or resolve.

Your need to express your feelings doesn’t oblige anyone else to listen if they don’t want to hear it.

You are not the only person whose desires and preferences matter. That’s the whole thing about relationships - they have to work for both people.

@LittleGreenDragons , I'm aware that she starts similar threads regularly but feel she'd probably be better off posting there.

Yes, you are probably right.

Have you just started a new thread under a different name?

Can someone link to the first thread?

iirc, from a previous thread, OP’s mum paid £20k towards the house deposit and has asked for it back if they split. I assume that’s adding to stress and complications.