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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I told my bitch sis what i thought of her today and....

43 replies

donbean · 04/04/2008 20:35

OMG OMG was shaking but the opportunity came up so i told her.
was a bit hairy for a moment but then she kind of agreed then we were ok.....
vvvvvery surprised!She asked if she could take my son out with her son over the half term and i said no because i dont trust her with him.
she was absolutely gobsmacked by this.

OP posts:
BeMyLilBaby · 04/04/2008 20:37

can u give some history? otherwise i just dont get why you would tell her this?

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:43

ahhh sorry,
yes, she claims to "hate kids"
whenever my son walks in the room she scowls at him...like you do when you have stepped in dog poo.
She told me he needs to see a Dr because he has got that "attention deficit disease"!!!!!She calls him a "cretin"

She has a 5 year old and you would never know she had a child because he isnt allowed any toys out at all.
she takes any noisy/messy toys that SHE doesnt like (that are given to her son as a present) to the charity shop..packaging intact.
Her only explanation is that she hates kids.

i dont agree that gives you license to be completely evil with any child that you come into contact with...therefore, i will not leave her alone with my son, will not take him to her home and have her son over to play like normal kids do.......
I have bitten my tongue for a very very long time.

any clearer??

OP posts:
CarGirl · 04/04/2008 20:44

It's coming back to me donbean, do you think your sister is actually going to change and be any better towards your dn?

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:44

Basically she is a clone of our mother who should never of had children....we all agree with this, even she agrees with it...yet there she is mini me of my mother.

OP posts:
warthog · 04/04/2008 20:45

so why did she want to take him over half term?

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:46

Probably will be better for a short term but then she slips back into her old ways.
My other sis had the vey same conversation with her...except that one was very heated, this was more a sane discussion tbh.

OP posts:
Broodybabywannabe · 04/04/2008 20:47

hmm i think this was fair to you to of said, but i think her behaviour towards her child is vile, can u not help your nephew in anyway?

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:47

because her son is "lonely" and loves my boy.
so i suggested that her son comes over to us to play.

OP posts:
Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:48

oh i do....he comes to ours and has an absolute riot!
He is my little darling

OP posts:
Broodybabywannabe · 04/04/2008 20:48

she sounds a very mean lady, and her son sounds like he must be suffering?

DoodleToYou · 04/04/2008 20:48

Message withdrawn

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:49

im right arent i....it isnt acceptable to just say "i dont like kids" and that be acceptable as an excuse to be down right nasty.

OP posts:
CarGirl · 04/04/2008 20:49

any chance sis would let dn come live with you/stay over frequently?

warthog · 04/04/2008 20:50

she sounds poisonous. you must be that kid's lifeline.

LyraSilvertongue · 04/04/2008 20:50

Why did she have a child if she hates children? Is she mean to her own son?
I'd never put up with anyone being mean to my DSs, sister or not.
Well done for telling her what you thought.

hecate · 04/04/2008 20:51

You are right. You are also very restrained. If someone called my child a cretin I'd rip their head off and shit down their neck. Congrats on not killing her!

LyraSilvertongue · 04/04/2008 20:51

No, it's not an excuse. Sounds like she might need counselling. Her attitude could be a result of her childhood if your mother was cold.

brimfull · 04/04/2008 20:54

I'm feeling for your dn

Broodybabywannabe · 04/04/2008 20:56

is there a specific reason she is cold and cruel? does she act this way to DN?

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:56

Its a mystery to us all why she had a child. She does love him but doesnt tolerate mess or noise, takes no responsibility for him in school hols, palms him off on my mother and has never had a birthday party for him....i have done 3 parties for him and his granny on his dads side has done 2.

he gets loads of love and attention from surrounding family and he is a happy little soul, however he is turning out like her about other children.
he does not tolerate my little niece at all, but loves my son.

OP posts:
NotABanana · 04/04/2008 20:57

Crap. Blaming her childhood is an excuse. She could make a choice to give her child a good life.

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 20:57

Our mother was not a very loving mother, shouldnt have had children...she is the very same.

OP posts:
Broodybabywannabe · 04/04/2008 20:58

donbean is DN dad loving enough to cmpensate?

Lulumama · 04/04/2008 20:58

your sister clearly has serious issues

maybe she is severly depressed?

it is not normal behaviour

well done for saying something, and great you have good times with your DN

Original poster
donbean · 04/04/2008 21:01

Actually that is one of the things i said to her during our "debate".
I said after our childhood, i would have thought that she would not want to be like our mother.
She agreed that she hates that she is like her.
I also said that these 3 children (mine, neice and nephew) are OUR children and that they are precious and should never ever be made to feel the way that we were made to feel as kids.
Again she agreed.

Think i struck a nerve with her and hopefully gave her some thing to think seriously about.

OP posts:
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