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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

How do you bring up someone's hygiene

53 replies

HMum19 · 21/11/2022 13:47

So, I need help broaching something with my boyfriend.
How do I politely ask him to shower/ wash himself before he have "intimate" time? I've never noticed an issue with his hygiene before, he isn't necessarily smelly or anything or that matter, but I have been having issues down below on and off and I am worried he is causing them, I know he doesn't always shower after we have sex and has admitted to going a day or day without showering after he have sex... And then will have sex with me again!
I have just finished a course of antibiotics after getting a urine infection and I just don't want to take any risks anymore. It always infuriates me that as a woman I'm always freshly clean and presented for him, for him to not make the effort to even shower for me! I can tell when it's freshly washed and when its not...
Such an awkward thing to even discuss because I love him to bits, but I can't risk another infection down below!!! How do I bring this up to him

OP posts:
ErniesGhostlyGoldTops · 15/07/2023 07:16

Did I actually read that you have sex, you then have sex again much later and he still hasn't showered?

I could go back and read the OP but I can't. There's only so much homage to fromage one can take in a day - sorry.

PaigeMatthews · 15/07/2023 07:19

HMum19 · 21/11/2022 15:12

Also, he was going out with his mates today for the footy, and last night he said "I need to get home early tomorrow so I can have a shower and head out" the cheek!!! Can shower for them but not me 😂
do I bring it up the next time he initiates sex or bring it up before?

so you know now it isnt an ignorance thing. It absolutely is a lack of respect.

RantyAnty · 15/07/2023 08:32

Just dump him.

This will never get any better.
Imagine living with or married to him and he just stopped washing, as that's exactly what would happen.

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